"I'm married, but I'm afraid I'm irresponsible?" Girls stick to the bottom line, how to see through men's shrewd calculations?

What is decency? In fact, it is a bit tacky to save face, but it is much more complicated to elaborate. Decent is a person's first words, an external evaluation of a person, and this is external decent; Dignity also represents a person's principles and bottom line. Whether a person can stick to his true heart and himself is a kind of inner dignity. Is to cherish feathers and wings. To put it bluntly, we should know how to cherish and love ourselves.

Women's dignity is closely related to happiness. Without dignity, a woman is afraid that she will never get married and live the life she wants. Lin Xiaoniang and her four daughters in the play are a typical example. Lin Xiaoniang was still repeating a sentence before she died. "I'll leave the big lady outside to be your concubine." She thinks men owe her, but in fact she doesn't know how to cherish herself.

Lin Xiaoniang indulged and instigated her daughter's four daughters to climb the dragon and attach themselves to the phoenix. In order to marry into the rich and powerful earl's family, she taught her daughter that "the dignity of the family is the most important thing, and her own dignity is the most important thing." In order to achieve her goal, she made her daughter have a private meeting with a foreign man by any means, and won the opportunity to marry into a rich family by getting pregnant before marriage. Lin Xiaoniang and four girls thought they were fighting for their dignity, but in fact they lost their dignity, but they didn't know how to love themselves.

Among the four girls who married into the rich family, she was the most disgraceful of the sisters, and Lin Xiaoniang didn't come to a good end, which was the result of not maintaining her dignity. Some people may say that this time is different from the past, but now is completely different from the past. Indeed, in ancient times, etiquette was strict, but in this world, it is more free and unrestrained. Although those dogmas in the past still exist, they are not as binding as in the past and become empty shelves.

Nowadays, the prejudice against women is getting weaker and weaker, and the rules of these old calendars have long lost their original binding force. This is a good thing for women, but Yan Fang still wants to warn everyone that self-respect and self-love are still important. Xiaoman didn't understand these truths before. After all, she is still young and has no life experience and social experience. Her idea is as simple as a blank sheet of paper.

If it weren't for her mother's strict requirements and timely awakening at the critical moment, she saved her daughter's happiness all her life. Xiaoman has already fallen into the tiger's nest at this moment, and it is difficult to get out again. Even if she is desperate to leave, she can't get away with it.

Looking back on the past and present, Xiaoman is really scared: "If this matter is put on others, I will only sigh at most, but this matter can be put on myself. I have a special sense of substitution. I took a wrong step, and now the fate of that woman is my fate. I'm really scared. I once accused my mother of being too old-fashioned and ruining my marriage. Now it seems.

Xiaoman's mother is an accountant. She usually works in a rigid way and is very strict. She has been very strict with her only daughter Xiaoman since she was a child. When I was five or six years old, I was severely beaten by my mother for stealing candy from a small shop, but it was only a dime. Even if her grandparents begged and her father stopped her, she would never be soft.

To this end, Xiaoman was afraid of his mother since he was a child, and he became more unfamiliar with his mother and son. However, Xiaoman still knows that although her mother is strict with her, she still loves her. Whatever her mother does is good for her. She never doubted it.

She remembers that her mother blamed her for punishing her. She also remembers that when her mother was bullied by her classmates at school, she was bullied by her classmates. Her mother rushed to school and killed everyone. I still remember that when she got chronic appendicitis as a child, although her mother showed her pain, she stayed up all night to observe herself and was always on standby.

"My mother is sometimes very strict, but it's not exactly like that. She doesn't care much about my homework and grades at school. She always says I work hard, which is good. But in my ideological and moral aspects, she is particularly strict. I used to think that she had mental control over me and wanted to keep me as a little pet, so that I could listen to her. It was not until later that I realized that those who only care about whether I will become a man and don't care about whether I have a future are the people who really love me. "

Xiaoman is growing up. Xiaoman's mother has always been strict about her communication with boys. She is not allowed to get too close to boys, nor is she forbidden to fall in love. But she only needs to know everything, report to Xiaoman from time to time, and investigate each other's personality and details, so that Xiaoman feels that her privacy has been violated, and she is very painful.

"I'm just in love, not looking for a husband, as for? This is ridiculous. I feel like I've been being watched. What are you talking about? " It was not until Xiaoman graduated from college that Xiaoman's mother relaxed a little, but she also made various demands.

"Before getting married, girls must not confess to boys without reservation. They must keep their dignity before marriage. Even if they are engaged, they must keep their bottom line and know how to respect and love themselves, but they must never lose their minds. " Xiaoman later talked about several times of love, with good family conditions and ordinary conditions. His mother was noncommittal, did not ask too much about family conditions, mainly the boy's personality, and warned Xiaoman.

"Your father and I still have some ability. We've been busy for half our lives. You are a girl. We can keep them for life. Family conditions are not too bad and not too good. We don't have any opinions. You mainly look at the personalities of boys and husbands. As long as he passes the test, he really treats you and can be good to you all his life, and his parents support you. "

Xiaoman once asked his mother why it was understandable that it was not too bad, but not too good. Mom smiled and replied, "You are too good to cherish you. He will think that you have conquered him. Even if he doesn't, his husband will look down on you. Our family doesn't want money. Such a husband wants you to marry and suffer? "

Later, Xiaoman met a boy, Hu Li. The boy is very kind to Xiaoman, with a good temper and a good personality, but his family conditions are really poor. The boy's job is average, and his parents' education is not high. Xiaoman's mother knows that her daughter doesn't like to interfere too much in her love affairs. After a rough consideration of the boy's personality, she didn't ask any more questions.

However, Xiaoman did not forget his mother's teachings, always kept them in mind, treated each other politely, kept the communication distance between men and women, and never crossed the line. Hu Li is also very supportive of Xiaoman, and there is no conflict or unpleasantness with Xiaoman. On the contrary, he also praised Xiaoman as a rare good girl today.

Two young people have been in love for a year and a half. At the urging of the boy's family, they got engaged. But even so, Xiaoman's mother kept nagging what she had said before in Xiaoman's ear, but she was interrupted by Xiaoman before she said a few words. "Mom, are you bored? You can memorize all your daughters by heart. Stop talking, I should throw up. "

Xiaoman's mother is still smiling. She is old and much softer than before. If Xiaoman had spoken like this before, she would have scolded her, but now she just looks at her daughter with affectionate and gentle eyes.

"Mom knows you know everything, but when she is old, she just has a broken mouth. Don't be angry. Mom has seen many things. At the moment before marriage, everything may change. Nothing is certain. Don't think too simply. Remember what mom said, and don't forget it for a moment. "

Xiaoman felt that his mother was thinking too much at that time, but on the third day after the engagement, the boy asked Xiaoman out in the name of eating supper. At twelve o'clock, Xiaoman looked at the time to pack up and go back, and Hu Li began to delay. "I play for a while. I have two friends coming later. They said they want to sing together. Everyone was disappointed when you were away. "

Xiaoman refused: "It's too late. I won't go back for a moment. My mother can't sleep for a moment. How can I let my mother go back so worried? "

Hu Li looked a little unhappy: "We are all engaged. What does your mother have to worry about? Even if we are together, it is reasonable not to go back tonight. What's wrong? "

Or you don't love me at all, so you make excuses to shirk it? If you really love me, you shouldn't refuse me. You are engaged. Are you afraid of my irresponsibility? I don't think you trust me at all. "

Xiaoman didn't think so much at that time, and was in a hurry to explain, so he blurted out: "It's not that I don't trust you, nor that I don't love you. After all, we are not married. It is not good to go out together, and it is even worse if we are pregnant. "

Hu Li replied, "What's not good to hear? Everyone is like this. Anyway, you are my wife who has never been to the door. What can you say? " What should I do if I am pregnant? I will definitely be responsible for the pregnancy. I'll get married right away and marry you in the door. This is a double happiness. "

However, no matter how hard Hu Li lobbied, Xiaoman finally left, and her heart was tangled, so she hesitated and almost agreed, but her mother's words lingered in her mind, eventually pulling her reason back and sticking to the bottom line.

After this incident passed, Xiaoman obviously felt that Hu Li was becoming more and more indifferent and indifferent to himself. At first, Hu Li called several times a day, but later only Xiaoman called and he didn't answer. Xiaoman asked him out on a date, and he also shirked that he was tired and refused to come out.

Later, I simply showdown with Xiaoman, and even confidently said that I blame Xiaoman: "I have understood that you don't love me at all and don't have any trust in me, so why should I marry you?" We can't break up because of your behavior. "

Xiaoman was very sad and cried many times to stay, but the boy quickly told Xiaoman that he had found the love of his life and was ready to get married, which completely killed Xiaoman. But Xiaoman still feels very sad and can't walk out. What if she agrees to the boy's request? She lost her love and marriage, and even blamed her mother. If it weren't for her, she wouldn't be so rigid and the boy wouldn't leave her.

But after Xiaoman's mother comforted Xiaoman, she only said one sentence: "It is not necessarily a blessing or a curse for you to break up with him. You won't listen to me anyway, just wait and see. " Xiaoman didn't understand at the moment. She thought her mother was bluffing and mystifying, but it turned out that her mother was right. Hu Li and that girl got married less than four months ago. It is said that the girl was pregnant for three months when she got married, so she had to get married so soon.

Needless to say, Hu Li naturally coaxed the girl with sweet words, just like Xiaoman at the beginning, but when it comes to marriage, Hu Li's family began to show its true colors. I didn't give the agreed bride price, and my stomach also stood out. The girl's family had no choice but to marry Hu Lijia naked, saying that she had brought a dowry, decorated the wedding room and bought a car for Hu Li. The girl's family just hopes that the girl will not be looked down upon by her husband's family.

After the child is born, it is a girl, and the girl's life is even more difficult. Her mother-in-law gave her little shoes to wear, and Hu Li didn't like her. Soon their relationship broke down and their marriage came to an end.

When she left, the girl left with her daughter, and the dowry was also posted to her husband's family. Hu Li's family also claimed that they married a fierce wife and were driven out of the house. Now they are planning a new marriage for their son. There are still a few people who know the inside story like Xiaoman's family. People who don't know really believe the story of the man's family. Some people really want to marry Hu Li's family and their daughter. Xiaoman watched the whole process, and he was frightened. Almost, the girl's fate is her own. It is this girl who replaced her, and their lives have changed dramatically.

Perhaps it is this Hu Li family that hides it so well that the girls are puzzled by it again and again. It seems that their personalities are not bad and their in-laws are friendly. However, they were only exposed after marriage. Xiaoman can see through a man's shrewd calculation and gratitude to his mother. People's words are terrible, and people's hearts are sinister. You may not care about gossip, but you have to be wary of people's hearts.

Dignity is also self-protection. If you throw it away easily, it will expose yourself to danger, and injury is inevitable. But if girls can respect themselves and protect their dignity, even if this man's knowledge is unbreakable, he can't beat this girl who knows how to stick to principles and the bottom line anyway. A girl who sticks to principles, sticks to decency and loves herself, her fate has always been in her own hands.