What are the classic funny jokes?

What are the classic funny jokes? These jokes are especially popular in real life. Many people will share them on social networks, and some of them can bring people a good mood. What classic jokes will I share for you?

What are the classic funny jokes? 1 1. The strong wind roared like a crazy lion, making a deafening sound. The trees were shaken violently by the wind and whined.

I angered my girlfriend again. It's no use apologizing She turned around the house angrily: Hum! I want to buy an expensive thing! As soon as I heard it, it turned around Spend money to eliminate disasters! Immediately say: OK! I will go shopping with you. Then we went to the commodity market and bought a washboard.

Sleep is an art, and no one can stop me from pursuing art!

When you grow up, marry Tang Yan as your husband, play if you can, and eat him if you can't.

5. Doing well in the exam depends on sitting at the same table.

6, breaking up is boring, we have the ability to play divorce!

7, I am small-minded, but not lacking, I have a good temper, but not lacking!

8, you also let me kneel and rub the washboard, I can't stand the electric heating!

9. Women like two kinds of flowers best in their life: one is to spend money, and the other is to spend as much money as possible!

10, two birds with the same life, a pair of poor butterflies.

1 1. Who do you think you are? You are overflowing water. I don't even want a basin.

12, my grandmother said that I was born from my knee, and when my mother bent her leg, I squeezed out from my knee.

13, as the saying goes: laugh and the whole world laughs with you; You cried. You are the only one crying in the world.

14, the so-called holiday, family members are suspected, have no money to go out, and every day is extra leisure.

15, people have lived all their lives. Don't be too cold in winter, too hot in summer, don't pretend to be poor if you have money, and don't show off if you have no money. Smiling is better than frowning. Friends often remember that they are happy all their lives!

16, stupid man+stupid woman = get married; Stupid man+smart woman = divorce; Smart man+stupid woman = extramarital affairs; Smart man+smart woman = romantic love.

17, God said there should be light, I said I opposed it, and the world was dark.

18, I am a civilized person, and all swearing words are disinfected by saliva.

19, the face is a thing outside the body. Whether it is necessary or not, money is a necessary thing, and it must be there.

20. The geography teacher asked: What are the four oceans? I replied: pleasant goat, beautiful goat, lazy goat, boiling goat.

2 1, so tired, I want to cut a knife on the back of my head, and then I collapsed on the ground to install the piggy bank.

22. When I see a beautiful woman, I first touch my pocket to see if there is any money!

If I were a princess, I would save a frog, but all I met were toads.

There are two reasons why inviting girls out to play failed. One is that she is too lazy to wash her hair, and the other is that your invitation is not worth washing her hair.

25, poor Nike, Fuadi, rogue Armani.

When you put on the wedding dress of love, I also put on the monk's cassock. ...

I go to bed like a wild animal, especially like a koala. I slept 18 hours.

28. Mozzie, you have hands and feet. Why don't you get a job and live a good life?

29. I will be good friends with anyone who says I am white, thin and beautiful.

30. The teacher said that you can't eat snacks in class. Fortunately, I brought hot pot today.

3 1. If I don't love you, I won't be bored enough to care about you.

32. It's a pity that we didn't have time to say it.

33. Sometimes, things are simple, and the complicated thing is your own head.

34. I may not love you, because owning is the beginning of losing.

35. Say to those women who love me: If you have the ability, you will love me all your life.

36. You are my belief, which makes me very firm and inseparable from you!

37, people can't take money into the grave. But money can take people to the grave.

38. It is better to forget you happily than to be in a world you don't want.

You need to forget what you have lost, be grateful for what you have and look forward to what is coming.

40. It's not that I don't want to play computer in the morning, but it's already noon as soon as I get up.

4 1. People's eyes are black and their hearts are red. Once jealous, the heart is black.

42. The person I trust most taught me not to trust anyone easily.

You said you could dance with me even if there is a cliff ahead, but that's just talk.

44. It takes thousands of years to change from a monkey to a human, but it only takes a bottle of wine to change from a human to a monkey.

45. I once picked up a candy and showed it to my father. He said he would taste it first to see if it was poisonous, but I didn't!

46. Without existence, who will witness your shameless happiness?

47. "Beijing Love Story" Lin Xia said to the madman: I love you has nothing to do with you.

48. The night gave me a pair of black eyes, but I rolled my eyes with them.

49. Lies are sweet words when told, and disgusting when poked!

If you forget how to move forward, think about why you came here in the first place.

5 1, turn you into my bad habit, it is better to turn me into your good mood!

52. I have a dream since I was a child, that is, everyone in China will give me a dollar!

53. The person who can board my number is either someone I trust or someone I love.

There is no moon in Mid-Autumn Festival. Is there a clear night sky like your heart?

55. There will always be a moment when you feel too powerful to need anything.

56. There is no distance between points in the world, only the distance between hearts.

57. When I was a child, my parents always believed that when a girl changed eighteen times, the ugly duckling would turn into a white swan, and then marry a rich man and become a rich woman. One day when I grew up, my father looked at me intently and said earnestly, "son, you should study hard."

58. Someone taught you how to love, but he doesn't love you anymore.

59. Our English teacher and math teacher can form an invincible alliance.

60, people are not embarrassed, standing instability! People are not damaged, not standardized!

6 1, people are grouped, which is why my list is so beautiful.

I have been single for a long time, let alone unscrewing the bottle cap. I can unscrew the fire hydrant.

63. Other girls can be gummy bears, angel babies and sweetheart babies. I can't. I must be an aunt and a living ancestor.

Don't smile at me with your pirated Mona Lisa smile. My stomach is not as strong as you think.

65. Many things are between not being wronged and being melodramatic.

66. One of the people I hate most is those who are good at flattery and proficient in rhetoric, because being with them will make me look like I don't know how to behave.

67. After coming home from college holiday, my mother cooked me a good dish. My father: Stop eating and don't mention it!

68. Two couples are chatting. The woman asked, honey, people say that women in love will become stupid. Do you think I'm stupid? Male affectionate style: fool, you are so stupid, how can I think you are stupid?

69. Don't mess around if you don't look good. Some people spend a lot of money to burn exquisite princess rolls, but they look like Newton instead of a princess.

70. When I have money, I will buy two lollipops, one for you to eat and the other for you to eat.

7 1. A few months ago, I found the place where my wife put her money. After that, I always reach out and touch one or two pieces of change every month. Until yesterday, I reached out and grabbed a cactus, and I knew it was time to stop.

72. The great thing about science is that you can't understand the answers, and the great thing about liberal arts is that you don't want to copy the answers after reading them.

I will give you a pair of scissors when your hair reaches your waist.

74. Life with food is like a train. To sum up: shopping, shopping, shopping.

75. Don't panic when your life is not smooth. Look at your wallet and savings, just cry.

If you can appreciate my strangeness, you will be as lovely as me.

77. I have returned the heavy rain I missed in those years to you these days.

78. Smart girls are usually fatter, because the latest scientific research proves that women use adipose tissue to store IQ. The thicker the fat layer, the higher the IQ.

79. Experts say, don't stare at your mobile phone for a long time, so it will be dead.

80. The first thing to wake up every day is to want to sleep.

What are the classic funny jokes? What are the two best humorous jokes?

1, eating is to survive, so eating food is just a person with a strong desire to survive.

2. Edible food is: whenever you know a new plant, you should also check its medicinal value and edible value.

3. Why do fools call themselves foodies?

As a foodie, the most terrible thing is not hunger, but you always feel that you have to eat something to be practical when you are not hungry.

I lose weight, the less I lose, the fatter I get.

6. I always take snacks with me when I eat, because I am afraid that I will starve to death at any time.

7, once the sea was difficult for water, fish-flavored shredded pork with chicken legs.

8, people are iron, rice is steel, and eating goods is better than stupid goods.

No one has died since ancient times. Eat as soon as possible.

10, Chihuo, come on, let me go, I want to lose weight.

1 1. Do you know why you lost weight? Losing weight means eating again.

12, others are full after eating two bites, and I can still eat two bites when I am full.

13, there are only three things that others can never take away: the knowledge you have learned, the dream in your heart and the food you have eaten. Therefore, I want to be a knowledgeable and ambitious gourmet.

14, eating life is like a train. In a word, it is: shopping, shopping, shopping, shopping, shopping, shopping. In the eyes of foodies, only food can wake her up.

15, eat by skill, eat by tactics!

16, the so-called eating goods, massive when hungry, embarrassed when not hungry!

17, eating means that others are full after eating two bites, and you can still eat two bites when you are full.

18, for all foodies: I'm not hungry, but my tongue is too lonely.

19, drying the house, drying the car, drying the food, drying the love, that's nothing, you have the ability to go out in the sun at noon.

20. If your female partner is a foodie, marry her. As the saying goes: eating goods is good for feeding.

2 1, the real foodies dare to face the thick thighs and dare to challenge the bulging abdomen.

I have a heart to lose weight and a stomach to eat food. They PK every day, and today Emma's stomach won again.

23. If you can only choose one person and your favorite food, how can you choose food? Eat food: eat the person you like!

24. Some friends in the circle of friends bask in objects, some bask in babies, some bask in beautiful scenery, and some bask in food, all of which are full of happiness. I can only bask in the sun, but I am also very happy!

25. There is another way to eat in the world, either eating or eating backwards.

26, the real food, never say: I am full.

27. People are born to die, either starving or dying.

28. It is said that eating food will not fail because it is too heavy, and the high number will not hang.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not eating, I'm just on my way to eat.

30. No matter how busy you are, you can't delay eating!

3 1, evil Monday is coming again. As a foodie, besides eating something good, how can I comfort my broken heart?

32. I just don't want my mouth to be lonely. I'm a gourmet. I speak for myself?

33. If you think that eating is the whole life of eating goods, it is wrong, and there is sleeping!

There are two things that others can't take away. One is the food you eat in your stomach, and the other is the dream you hide in your heart. So, be a dreamy foodie and you will be invincible!

35. Come to my arms, or let me live in your belly, wake up the sleeping taste buds and absorb food.

36. Food doesn't have to be on the table!

37. Eat food, enjoy it in your mouth, and remember being thin in your heart.

38. Mention a city. Think about the food there. This is the meaning of gourmet travel.

As long as you are alive, you will meet delicious food.

40, picky eaters are not worthy of eating.

4 1. There are two me in the world, one is eating delicious food, and the other is really trying to lose weight.

42. Finding food to cook and enjoy is a great pleasure in life. Where can I find the joy of life without food?

43, find a wife to eat, eat after eating, easy to enjoy.

44. Don't dislike the food around you. Because they are the simplest, as long as they have good food, they will have a good mood and will not care about everything. Don't always care.

45. Every eater probably has untold sufferings in his heart. Blocking his mouth with food just avoids his own mouth.

46. I have a heart to lose weight, but I have a mouth to eat.

47. Dry your baby, house, car, things and food. You said I looked noisy, but I didn't. You think I should tan this. Bask in the quilt, bask in the sun. If you are in a good mood, you can get more fucking faces!

48. You can be a foodie, but don't be a foodie with only food in your mind. There are steamed buns for dinner, pillows at night, a dry head at work and an end at night.

49. I always wander between full and full.

50. If these two feelings are long-lasting, they are pork and pork.

5 1, there is no love if you don't eat. If you don't believe me, please have an uninvited love affair.

52. Who said that eating food can't do anything but eat? They also know that they are hungry.

53. Which is more important, food or figure? Eat food: What's your figure? Can I eat?

54. Eating goods can always treat the blackboard eraser as a buttered bread.

The biggest worry about eating food is not that there is nothing to eat, but that there are many delicious foods in front of you, but it is sad to find that your stomach can't hold it.

56. The highest level of eating goods is eating goods.

57. Be a carefree eater and an idle eater.

58. When you eat, you can always finish what is not delicious.

59, small chaos, small head, thin skin, as long as you scoop it into boiling water, you can put it in a bowl and take a bite, it's delicious!

60, drink soup first, Dont Ask For Help prescription.