I am writing this paper to talk about my own experience, especially the influence of bad teacher-student relationship on teaching effect.

The psychological development of middle school students is easily influenced by interpersonal relationships around them because of their physiological and psychological characteristics. Different types of teacher-student relationships have great influence on the healthy psychological development of students. Although Dignity for Teachers has withdrawn from the historical stage and become a pedantic old calendar, it advocates the establishment of a new relationship between teachers and students. However, some educators still consciously or unconsciously face their students with a condescending attitude. Even regard students as containers and products, which leads to the situation that students dare to think and dare not say anything. There is a lack of communication and understanding between teachers and students, and students are afraid of teachers, afraid or unwilling to talk to them. Teachers can't understand their inner needs, nor do they know their inner joys and sorrows. This spiritual gap between teachers and students not only affects the effect of education and teaching. It also affects the healthy development of students' psychology. Suhomlinski said: "If students don't want to tell their teachers their joys and sorrows, and don't want to meet them honestly, then it is ridiculous to talk about any education, and any education is impossible." This shows how important it is to establish a good relationship between teachers and students.

In fact, every teacher who loves his work is willing to be a friend of his students, eager to know his students and hope that they can grow up healthily and happily. If he is the head teacher, this idea will be stronger. I have been a teacher for seven years and a head teacher for four years. I've been thinking and exploring ways to be friends with students, how to know their hearts as soon as possible, and let them know that you care about their hearts. In these years of exploration, I have learned.

There are many ways to build a colorful bridge of mind. I use the "weekly diary communication method". Students communicate with me through weekly diaries. It is in this exchange that many students and I have become close friends. This is a shortcut for me to cultivate the feelings between teachers and students.

Because I am the head teacher, I really want to know every student in my class as soon as possible. So I asked each student to prepare a notebook to communicate with me. I asked them to go home and write a weekly diary every weekend, including the class, themselves, classmates, family members, teachers and so on. There is no limit to the number of words. The only requirement is neat handwriting and clear expression. After they give it to me, I will read it as soon as possible and try my best to solve the difficulties they raised. Seriously consider their ideas and suggestions. At first, the students wrote an article every week. Later, some students encountered problems at school and wrote them in the weekly diary. After writing it, they put it on my desk and wanted to communicate with me at any time. According to the changes of their needs, I also made adjustments: after writing it, you can give it to me at any time, not limited to articles, but at least once a week. In this way, my classmates communicated with me.

After the successful construction, I will make good use of it. The original purpose is: I can use her to understand their ideas and requirements when arranging seats; When arranging dormitories and beds for students on campus, we can use it to understand their needs; When selecting class cadres, you can use it to listen to everyone's voices; Suggestions for teachers can also be written on it. As long as their demands are reasonable, I will try my best to coordinate. If it can't be solved well, I will explain the reasons in detail in their notebooks. Through these little things, the trust between us has been greatly enhanced. I know them and they can understand me. Slowly, they are also willing to tell me more psychological words, and our communication is gradually deepening, and its use is becoming more and more important. Can let me help those students with family difficulties and sensitive and fragile hearts; Can let me coordinate their previous contradictions; It can also avoid some wars ... Another girl said in her weekly diary that she hated her mother's preaching and was extremely disgusted. In fact, she knows that her mother is good for her, but she can't change that idea in her heart. We discussed this problem in the weekly diary. I asked her to try to feel her mother's feelings and let her try to "enjoy" her mother's love and change slowly. Try to have a grateful heart. This process is very long. I don't know whether her mother felt the change of her daughter, but I know that the title of an award-winning composition of this classmate is "Motherly Love". I also met a classmate who is extremely introverted. There is a new teacher in the class. Because of a little thing, he mistakenly thought that the new teacher hated him. He never dared to look up at the teacher in this class. He didn't take the initiative to answer the question. The teacher just thinks he is introverted and uneasy. Later he mentioned it in his weekly diary, which surprised me. I learned the whole story as soon as possible, and it turned out to be just a knot in his own department. I communicated with this teacher, and we went to help him untie this knot. He didn't exclude the class, nor was he afraid of the teacher. There is a classmate's father. My mother is also sick, but she is afraid that her classmates will look down on her. After he told me in his weekly diary, I tried my best to help him: apply for partial tuition waiver for him, buy medicine for him when he was ill, and prepare some daily necessities for him. There are many examples of this and that. I think the "color bridge of the soul" has made great contributions to my classmates' favorite teacher and trustworthy friend.

Tagore said: "It is not the hammer that strikes, but the song and dance of water that forms beautiful pebbles." Only when teachers call on students with love, enlighten students with wisdom, respect each student, and communicate with each student with people who are completely equal to themselves, can students "learn from their way and believe in it". As educators, we should let the educated people listen to our correct teaching and be willing to accept our opinions and even criticisms. We must communicate with them with love, gain their trust and become real tutors, so as to establish a friend-like teacher-student relationship under the new situation, which will also be a new beginning for our successful educational practice.