What are the characteristics of pre-Qin marriage etiquette?

Category: culture/art >> Historical topics

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Analysis:

In the pre-Qin period, there were five kinds (including accepting gifts, asking names, concubinage, accepting gifts and inviting parties), and later generations gradually evolved into ritual festivals such as urging makeup, sending makeup and vacating houses.

Weddings, ancient and modern, Chinese and foreign, are considered as great gifts in life ceremonies. But from ancient times to modern times, the understanding of it is quite different. The ancients believed that it was an unshirkable task for the younger generation to carry on the family line, that is, the so-called "unfilial three, no heirs." Therefore, the marriage ceremony of men and women mating and having children is placed in a very important position. Wedding is closely related to the marriage system, which reflects people's civilization from one side. The ancestors of the Chinese nation, with the Han nationality as the main body, like all nationalities in the world, experienced the stage of disorderly marriage and group marriage in primitive times, and basically adopted the form of monogamous marriage after entering civilized society.

The initial wedding form began at the end of primitive society, from the engagement ceremony in Fuxi era, gradually evolved into "welcoming guests in the hall" in Xia and Shang dynasties, and then to the complete "six ceremonies" in Zhou Dynasty, which initially laid the foundation for the traditional wedding in China. After several generations of development, various wedding ceremonies have become more complicated and enthusiastic.

Generally speaking, traditional weddings in China can be divided into three stages: pre-wedding ceremony, formal wedding ceremony and post-wedding ceremony. Prenuptial ceremonies are some ceremonies held in the planning and preparation stage of marriage.

In ancient feudal society, marriage depended on "parents' orders and matchmakers' words". Therefore, all the ceremonies of the pre-marital ceremony, including a series of links from choosing a spouse to preparing for the formal wedding, are almost arranged by both parents, excluding the parties to the real marriage.

Because men's social status is more noble than women's, most marriage proposals are initiated by men. If a man's parents want to marry his son, they must first ask the media to propose marriage to the woman's family (called "marriage"). If the woman accepts this marriage, they will begin to accept gifts, ask names and a series of ceremonies.

Nacai: It is the first step for a man to formally propose to a woman.

On the day when the two sides agreed to hold the ceremony of "accepting talents", the media sent by the man's family held a live wild goose as a gift (at first, the live wild goose was taken as a gift, that is, the wild goose was taken as a migratory bird, flying south in autumn and returning north in spring, coming and going from time to time, never breaking his word, as a symbol of loyalty between men and women; The reason why geese are used to stop is to make it clear that marriage must be orderly and insurmountable. Later, mutton, white goose, acacia and glue paint were used. Come to the woman's door as a gift. He said to the person who refused the woman's house (the person who assisted in the salute): "Your host is very kind and gave XXX (husband's name) a wife. XXX (husband or brother) asked me to ask your master to hold a ceremony in your home to choose a lady according to the regulations left by his ancestors.

After learning that, the hostess went out to greet her, and after the guests and the host bowed to each other, the media envoy once again expressed to the hostess the meaning of coming to accept the ceremony. The host reciprocated, accepted the live geese, and made some humility. When the matchmaker saw that the marriage was officially agreed by the woman's parents, he left and came back to me.

Make-up and make-up shop: These three ceremonies were not recorded in the pre-Qin literature, but developed by later generations in the evolution of weddings.

Makeup reminder is a musical instrument festival in which men send people with gifts to urge women to make up for the bride as soon as possible. In the Song Dynasty, three days before the wedding, the male family would give the female family ornaments, gold hijabs and flower fans, and the female family would use gold and silver to win over the royal family, Hualuopu heads, green robes and boots.

Send make-up, a few days before the wedding, the bride's family sent someone to send the dowry to the man's house. Dowry is often packed in boxes. Some people put Yao's dowry on the square table and send it to the man's house in a row. Dowry usually includes boxes, bedding, jewelry, clothes, silks and satins, Four Treasures of the Study and gold and silver utensils, as well as fields, houses, shops and pawn shops. In Zhejiang, there is a kind of dowry called "Tong Tong" (there is a big lid on the bucket for the bride to have a baby). The bucket contains red eggs and happy fruit, which is called "giving away children" and means blessing. In Shaoxing area, there is "daughter wine" as a dowry, that is, after the daughter is full moon or a few years old, that is, several winemaking jars are buried in the ground and taken out as dowry gifts for the man's family on the day of her marriage.

Laying a house is a ceremony in which the woman sends someone to the man's house to lay a new house, sometimes at the same time as sending makeup. In the Song Dynasty, the day before the wedding ceremony, the woman's family would send people to the new house, spread curtains, bedding and other utensils in the room, and prepare gifts to warm the room. Then use a trusted woman or a married woman to guard the room, and no outsiders are allowed to enter, waiting for the new person. The shopkeeper must be a "good woman" with a long life and a well-off family to get good luck. This custom is still popular in some modern places.

Kissing: It is a ceremony for the groom to marry the bride at the bride's house, and it is also the most complicated and grand ceremony in ancient and modern weddings.

According to the book Yili's Wedding. Stone ",on the wedding night, the bride put on her wedding dress-pure dress with light red lace (silk dress) and wore a" second "(braided wig) on her head. In the room of Xiangnan station, the nanny stood on her right, and the bride's female attendant stood behind in a white and black coat. When the groom wears a dress and leads a team of ink carts (the groom rides), floats (the bride rides with curtains), slave carts, servants, etc. Arriving at the bride's door, the hostess came out to meet him in person. After some ceremony, the two sides came to the class, and the groom bowed to his father-in-law (the heaviest bow-down ceremony in ancient times, which took a long time to kowtow). Give her a dress as a warning at the same time. Then, the bride came to her mother on the west steps. Her mother tied a belt around her waist and put on a scarf, and then warned her, "Be diligent and respectful, and do all the housework your parents-in-law tell you to do." Later, the bride and groom walked to the gate together. The bride put on a dust-proof coat, boarded the float and took the drive belt from the groom. So the groom drove the float forward. The wheel turned for three weeks, and the groom gave the car to the driver. He took the ink car first because he had to pick up the bride at home.

Wedding banquets spread to later generations, including sedan chairs, happy cars and floats. The bride's wedding dresses are mostly crested with dragon and phoenix patterns and colorful ornaments, with silk tassels hanging down to cover her face, and some are covered with red scarves and paper fans. When the groom arrives at the woman's house, the bride often cries and refuses to get on the sedan chair, so the bride's relatives and friends have to try it in public-ask the groom to write a poem, and the bride will get on the sedan chair only after the groom recites the "make-up poem" on the spot. Before getting on the sedan chair, the woman's family first asks a woman to take a lamp or mirror to shine in the sedan chair, which is called "taking a photo inside the sedan chair", thinking that this can suppress evil spirits. In modern times, after the sedan chair is lifted, the woman pours a pot of water at the door. The original intention is that water can cleanse pollution, and of course it can cure evil spirits and ghosts. Later, it evolved into "the water spilled by the married daughter"-I wish my daughter a harmonious relationship with her husband's family after marriage and will not be rejected.

On the way to the wedding reception, the sedan chair is very imposing: the front is to clear the way, followed by deacons, lanterns, drum music, and then the bride's sedan chair. Blowing along the road presents a festive scene. Sedan chairs greet the man's house and neighbors ask for lucky money, which is called "blocking the door": the farewell party scatters copper coins into the air and the children scramble to grab them, which is called "stars all over the sky" Another man took a flower bucket and scattered his food, beans, money, fruit and other things at the door, allegedly to avoid the evil spirits that prevented the bride from entering the door. The bride is going to get off the sedan chair, but her feet can't touch the ground. She can only wear green cloth strips, felt mats or sacks. Because the ancients believed that the earth and the sky were sacred and inviolable, once the bride's feet touched the land, they would inevitably offend the land god, so they had to cover them with blankets or mats to avoid it. This custom is recorded in Bai Juyi's poem "Marrying a Woman in Spring" in Tang Dynasty: "Tsing Yi becomes a felt mattress, which is beautiful and oblique." In the Song Dynasty, seats were changed to seats, which were called "passing seats" or "passing bags". Impromptu or sacks were passed around until the bridal chamber, and the homophonic words "rest" (that is, children and descendants) and "generation" all meant to carry on the family line. Later, some strong relatives of the woman's family carried the bride off the sedan chair and got on the bed. So far, he has become the bride's brother-in-law, carrying the bride on and off the sedan chair.

When the bride comes to the front of the new house, she should cross the saddle to show peace, and some cross the fire to suppress evil.

Visiting the church: it is a ceremony for the bride to worship God, father, relatives and husband after entering the door.

In the pre-Qin period, the bride met her in-laws in the early morning of the second day of marriage. After bathing, the bride was led by her praise to see her in-laws. The bride walked to her father-in-law's table with a bamboo board full of dates and chestnuts in her hand, bowed to the east, then knelt down, put the bamboo board on the table, touched it with her father-in-law's hand, stood up and bowed back, and the bride bowed again, then went down to class, took the bamboo board full of dried meat from the waitress, and went to her mother-in-law's table, paying the same ceremony as before.

Then, instead of her parents-in-law, the editor gave the bride a ceremony and gave her sweet wine. Then, the bride gives her parents-in-law a "feeding gift" with the food prepared according to the regulations to show that her parents-in-law will take care of her life in the future. On the third day, the parents-in-law returned the gift to their daughter-in-law.

After the parents-in-law and daughter-in-law toasted each other, the parents-in-law stepped down from the west stage and the new daughter-in-law stepped down from the east stage. This is the position of the host, indicating that the new daughter-in-law has obtained the qualification to succeed her mother-in-law as a housewife. On an auspicious day in the third month after meeting her in-laws, the new wife will go to the ancestral hall of her husband's family to hold a "temple fair"-that is, to meet her ancestors and comfort them. After this series of ceremonies, the new wife officially became a member of the in-laws family.

From the Han and Wei Dynasties to the Tang Dynasty, in the northern region, church visits were held in "Lu Qing". The so-called "Lu Qing" is to set up a tent in the open air in the southwest corner of Jidi's home. The bride stepped into Lu Qing from the specially prepared felt mat, and her parents-in-law followed in the footsteps of the bride, suppressing the spirit of her daughter-in-law. After the bride gets started, she worships the pigsty and the stove first, then the husband and wife worship, and then meet her in-laws and relatives the next day.

Later, the ceremony was gradually changed to the wedding night. After the groom marries the bride, he stands in front of the hall with a red and green satin knot at one end and asks the man's wife to take off the bride's masked towel with a weighing beam or a machine comb.

The bride and groom worship heaven and earth first, and then meet their in-laws and relatives in turn. At this time, worshippers and worshippers often give gifts to each other. Finally, the couple paid homage. After the ceremony, the couple were sent to the new house by relatives and friends.

Combination of booze and wine: Throughout the ages, booze is almost an essential ceremony for every newlywed. Nowadays, "Eating Wedding Banquet" has become the abbreviation of folk wedding.

Of course, the scale of the feast is different, but the main significance is that the marriage of the bride and groom has been recognized by relatives and friends. Therefore, booze is also the most social part of the wedding. In the pre-Qin era, the bride and groom held a banquet not with everyone, but in a new house. Under the command of the master of ceremonies, the bride and groom sat opposite each other, took some food and drank according to certain procedures, and then walked out for a short time. At the banquet, the most meaningful ceremony is "mixing wine".

"Combining wine" is a ceremony in which the bride and groom hold hands and drink each other. The glass is divided into two, which symbolizes that couples are originally two bodies; Connect the handle with a thread, symbolizing that the two people are connected through marriage; One of them symbolizes that although the couple are still United. The newlyweds eat the dishes prepared by tripod and drink a cup at the banquet, which symbolizes the mutual respect, love and intimacy between husband and wife. Because of the profound significance of this ceremony, this program is essential for the subsequent wedding. Of course, with the changes of the times, the names are different ("drinking a glass of wine"), the utensils are also changing, and the forms of drinking are also different.

After the Qin and Han Dynasties, before and after the wedding banquet, ceremonies such as "spreading accounts" and tying the knot were added. When the groom welcomes the bride into the new house, they sit opposite each other in the wedding bed, and then the female guests or emcee who come to attend the wedding sing and throw money and colorful fruits into the account, which is called "throwing the account". Then, give the bride some hair removed from the groom's head in advance and let her comb it with her own hair. This is called "knotting".

After that, the groom got out of bed, went to the outer room to receive congratulations from relatives and friends, and hosted everyone to attend the banquet, while the bride continued to sit in her tent until the banquet was over and the groom went back to the room again.

Harassment: In modern times, this is a ceremony for newlyweds to accept congratulations on their wedding night and frolic in the new house. There is a folk saying that "it doesn't matter if you get married for three days" and "it's too funny, the more noisy, the happier you are".

In the pre-Qin era, the end of the bride and groom's banquet marked the basic end of the wedding ceremony, and then the bride and groom went to bed.

About the Han Dynasty, the guests and friends attending the wedding were reluctant, so they had the practice of "listening to the room": on the wedding night, people who like to watch the excitement quietly came to the window of the new house and eavesdropped on the words and deeds of the bride and groom, making them laugh.

Spread to the Jin Dynasty, there was a folk custom of teasing the bride: before it was made public, all kinds of strange questions were used to make things difficult for the bride, and even practical jokes were played on the bride.