Participation process and matters needing attention in Zhangye City, Gansu Province

Engaged? It was called "Naji" in ancient times. After the housekeeping is satisfied, both men and women will choose an auspicious day to hold the engagement ceremony, and the date is generally chosen on bimonthly and bimonthly. If men and women belong to the same genus or one of them has a bad birthday, there is also a single date.

The man's family should prepare clothes for the woman and carry a certain amount of cash, two pork "gifts", cigarettes, wine and so on. And the woman's family will cook one of the pork gifts and return it to the man's family, which means that the marriage has been completed. The woman's family should also entertain guests to create an atmosphere and announce their engagement to relatives and friends.

Extended data:

Gansu marriage custom culture;

First, matchmaking

The basic steps of matchmaking are: after the man's family obtains the woman's birthday through the matchmaker, please ask the Yin and Yang teacher to calculate. If the personalities of men and women match, marriage will be concluded.

Then the man invited the matchmaker to the woman's house as a matchmaker, commonly known as "matchmaker". After the woman's parents get the girl's consent, the young men go to the woman's house to "see the daughter-in-law" and meet the young women to exchange blind dates.

Some young women will pay a return visit to the man's house, which is called "looking at the house (home)". Of course, the man's parents are indispensable when meeting. Some young men and women can freely fall in love and get engaged for life, and then ask someone to tell their parents and get approval before they can formally get engaged.

Second, engagement.

Engagement is called "rack lock" in Gansu. The introducer decided, the two sides agreed, and then the engagement ceremony was held on another day. The man's father (or agent) and the introducer went to the woman's house with generous gifts.

Gift money generally includes wedding wine, wedding buns 12 (commonly known as "big steamed bread"), wedding money (called "lock lock"), wedding silk (cloth), clothes and so on. The woman's family will gather elders and close relatives to accompany them and hold a banquet.

The girl is accompanied by her sister and sister-in-law, and the man's parents will tie a red rope with coins around the girl's neck, which is called "tying the daughter-in-law". Legend has it that this tie connects the girl with the man's family.

After resigning, the woman's mother also gave gifts to her new son-in-law and bought two steamed buns, which were called "counter-offer". Afterwards, the woman distributed the steamed bread to close relatives and announced the marriage. There is an important link in betrothal, that is, the two sides discuss the bride price money. Sometimes, it will be red in the face, but under the mediation of the introducer, we finally reach an agreement and everyone is happy.

Third, salute

Also called "gift giving". This is a more cautious link, mostly held in the first half of the wedding. The man's family chose the auspicious day of marriage, and his father would make an appointment with an introducer to bring the original bride price, wedding banquet and makeup clothes to the woman's family.

Daughter-in-law is bound to hold a banquet and invite her elders to accompany her. During the dinner, the wedding time and ceremony were agreed. The children and in-laws of both sides toasted each other, apologized to each other and said something auspicious and happy.

Fourth, talk about

According to the traditional practice, the man's family is the active party in the marriage, parents should choose an auspicious day to get married, and the matchmaker should inform the other party to get married.

Call it "mentioning words" or "sending the day". Speaking is usually done in the month before an auspicious day, which is called "not talking every other month". For example, this month, at least ten days in advance.

V. Getting married

Commonly known as "introducing a new wife". As the auspicious day is approaching, the man cleans the courtyard, washes the doors and windows, asks for calligraphy and painting, arranges the new house and informs relatives and friends. Near the 23rd, the man slaughtered pigs and sheep, bought supplies and took care of relatives, invited the "general manager", invited chefs, invited guests, invited family members and posted wedding invitations. ...

Busy as a bee.

On the day before the auspicious day, ancestors were invited, genealogy was invited, sacrifices were made and incense was burned. On an auspicious morning, buy wine, raise rice and bid farewell to married people. Generally, there are 3 to 5 people attending the wedding, including matchmaker, matchmaker, suitcase carrier, etc.

Bring the wedding banquet, wedding dress, windbreaker cloak and wedding money (including "unpacking money", "dowry money" and wedding invitations). Arrive at the woman's house at the chosen auspicious time.

Relatives and in-laws of the woman's family go to the woman's house the day before the wedding to discuss important matters. The number of people who decide to send the bride is usually eight or ten, which can be more or less, and must be an even number. Generally pay attention to "using phase" and "avoiding phase". Relatives and friends and unmarried girls in the village brought gifts or gifts to the woman's house the day before to "add boxes" (congratulations).

When the bride arrives, she simply eats and drinks a little, then goes to the boudoir, puts down a box of money first, and then puts the hijab on the bride's head, commonly known as "stopping the head". At this time, the container holder returns first. After the bride is fully dressed, she carries the little red book (the "marriage book"), burns incense in front of the ancestral tablet, and then kowtows to your relatives. Have brothers and sisters to guide you out and start with married people.

When the bride goes out, the bride's family will distribute a pair of red chopsticks among the married people, and at the same time, the man will distribute the "money with the woman" to the seven aunts and eight bitches of the bride's family. At this point, the girl had already cried into tears. It is said that when a girl leaves her family, the more tears she shed, the better. Every tear is her family's "Jin Doudou".

Although it is a happy event for a female university to get married, it can't be fired. In the old days, if the wedding procession ran into a rolling table, a road wheel, a big tree or a cliff head of a cellar well, a red note with a "bonus cover" was put on the intersection, which was called "road post" or covered with a red carpet, which was called "white tiger cover".

Sixth, pick up new people

Everyone will be at the intersection when waiting for the wedding procession. When the wedding procession is approaching the man's house, there is a notice that the "manager" is responsible for watching. The "manager" told everyone to wait in front of the gate to meet the "distinguished guest" (the person who saw the wedding off) and would arrange for the distinguished guest to enter the hospital first.

At this time, some young people are hugging wedding cars, others are spreading flowers and spraying foam ribbons. Of course, there is also an important link here, that is, when the bride gets off the bus, she must give money to the accompanying "riding doll" before the bride can get off the bus. It should be noted here that in some places in Gansu, the bride can't land and needs to be carried to the new house by the groom.

As soon as the distinguished guests entered the yard, they bowed to each other and welcomed them into the house; Some even set up a wine table in front of the gate and put a few simple dishes (called dismounting seats) to welcome guests. Then, the "big officials" poured wine and respected each other one by one, each with three cups, which was called the "Phoenix Bell", and then the welcoming room kowtowed and held incense in front of the ancestral tablet.

After the ceremony, when invited to take a seat, the "general officer" instructs the person occupying the seat to drink tea first, and then rinse his mouth with tea. The food is generally "four pots and one plate". After dinner, the neighbors arranged in advance ask them to have a rest and eat soup (noodles), and then invite them to another restaurant to entertain them in the evening. This is called "moving seats".

Gansu customs are very kind to guests, and the banquet includes thirteen flowers, twelve spirits, perfect people and nine guests, accompanied by relatives and friends. During the dinner, the groom's parents and brothers took turns toasting to say hello.

On the wedding day, the same VIP as the VIP is aunt (the bride and groom's family), and the reception scene and etiquette are basically similar to those of the VIP.

After dinner, each neighbor gets one person and arranges to sleep at night. The next day, our family still set the seats and "sent away" the distinguished guests and aunts in turn. At this time, the man will send a pair of leather shoes to the "introducer" to show his gratitude.

Seven, bed, new house

In the evening, the bed is made, and men and women who like each other (folk call them "wearers") "change cups" for the bride and groom, that is, find a red ruler with a copper coin at each end and put it in two cups full of wine. The bride and groom drank half each, and then exchanged drinks, because "a thousand miles of marriage"

Then the female leader began to make the bed for the bride and groom, took out the walnuts and jujubes that had been prepared long ago, sang auspicious words: "A handful of walnuts and jujubes, with dolls running all over the kang ..." Finally, "sweeping the kang" and chatting while sweeping. During the period, of course, the onlookers will play funny games, and the young couple will be invited to play some embarrassing games, which is called "making trouble in the bridal chamber"

In fact, the trouble of the new house has already begun. During the day, as soon as the new wife enters the door, women ask questions to test the bride's cleverness. The restless boys tease and ask the couple to light a cigarette and propose a toast for them. The new house is full of laughter and excitement all day.

After I got into bed, I closed the doors and windows and lit a lamp in my new house. I should have stayed until dawn. At this time, there are fellow busybodies lurking outside the bridal chamber to eavesdrop on the whispers of the young couple, which is called "listening to the room."

The old custom holds that people don't listen to ghosts, so if no one listens, set up a broom to scare ghosts. Since ancient times, this custom has been designed for joking.

Eight, to be close to the house (clan)

The next day, the distinguished guests were sent away, and aunts, uncles and relatives were seated in turn by the host, and sometimes dozens of tables were set. During the dinner, the groom's father (who can also be replaced by other elders) poured wine for the villagers.

Accompanied by one person, the bride and groom kowtowed one by one to recognize their relatives. The bride's mouth sweetly calls out various names to offer cigarettes and drinks. Of course, the called person has to give a red envelope to his new wife. The whole wedding ended in such a lively atmosphere.

Nine, Huimen

Huimen is an essential part of Gansu's marriage customs. Three to seven days after the wedding, the groom should prepare gifts, take his new wife back to her mother's house, and come back that day, so she can't stay at her mother's house.

When you go back in the first month of the New Year, you can stay for a few more days. All relatives of your husband's family travel, which is called "wave relatives".

References:

Baidu Encyclopedia-Naji