Recalling the Traditional Marriage Prose in Southwest Shandong Province

Every National Day, the city is always immersed in joy. The streets are full of red flags and heavy traffic. Some people travel to scenic spots by car, some people visit relatives and friends by light rail and bus, and some people "stay at home" to have a "family reunion dinner" and enjoy the fun of "family photos". But the most striking thing is marriage and celebration.

"Eleventh" at noon, my son and daughter-in-law brought their grandchildren home for reunion, and my son accompanied me to drink old wine. After three rounds of wine, I suddenly heard firecrackers ringing downstairs, mixed with the deafening sound of "kicking two feet". I looked out of the window, ah! What a nice style. I saw eight brand cars lined up in the driveway. The groom is wearing a suit and tie, holding flowers, and the bride is elegant in a white wedding dress with a peach face. Busy people blocked the road. Looking at this luxurious wedding scene, my mind was rolling and my thoughts kept rolling, and I immediately recalled the wedding scene of my hometown in southwestern Shandong decades ago.

In the past, as in other parts of the country, the marriage of young men and women was mostly arranged by feudalism, and "the words of parents and matchmakers" became an iron law. It is natural that men should get married and women should get married. Generally, the matchmaker takes the needle first, and then the parents ask each other; Then quietly ask the yin and yang teacher to measure the eight characters; If both men and women agree, the man will give the bride price to the woman; Choose an auspicious day of the zodiac to determine the wedding date; Then, according to custom, the wedding was organized in full swing. The most important thing for the man is to prepare the wedding room and buy the main furniture, while the woman prepares the dowry, including clothes, quilts and individual women's furniture. At that time, sewing wedding quilts was very particular, and a woman with two children was needed to sew them. It is said that it is unlucky for widows to absolutely pull over. When sewing a quilt, put red dates and peanuts in the four corners, which means "premature birth" and "peanuts" for both men and women; Finally, marry a new daughter-in-law into the house.

As soon as the auspicious day arrived, the man's wedding procession immediately came to the door. The scale and complexity of the scene depends on the specific situation of the man's family. Rich people drive wagons and bring "sounding instruments" (suona team), while ordinary people ride ox carts and lead donkeys. The arrangement of the wedding team is also very particular. At the front is the beating team, followed by the bride and groom in a carriage or ox cart, or the bride riding a donkey, the groom holding the rope, and then the bride sending a dowry. Generally there should be a chest of drawers, a dresser and a pair of wooden boxes. No matter cabinets, tables and boxes, they should be painted in red and solid colors, which means happiness. There are clothes and quilts in the box. Rich people want to buy more than a dozen new quilts, and they drive or pick them up alone, showing off all the way. Walking at the end of the team is the boy who resists the door curtain, demanding correct facial features and lively behavior. I was only six or seven years old at that time, and I was lucky enough to win these roles three times. Every time, you not only eat happily, but also drink happily, and you can get a red envelope of "love money".

There is also a special custom in southwestern Shandong-"crying for marriage". When the wedding procession arrived, the bride had already turned her face, dressed and dressed up, and had to "wail" in front of her mother and all her neighbors before leaving, crying, talking and crying. Some high-level girls can cry into an opera with content and rhythm. According to the old man, this is "tears of joy" and "tears of gratitude". I thank my parents for their kindness and the care of my neighbors. The more you cry, the deeper your feelings; The more painful you cry, the more grateful you are. Therefore, although the daughter cried "in the dark" and "all over the world", only the mother shed tears, and others were either indifferent or snickered.

In the old society before marriage, no matter men or women, they have never seen anyone's "true face". There is a custom in southwest Shandong, which is very strict with girls at ordinary times. You must never show your face in front of strangers, and your aunt and sister-in-law are much more relaxed. Every time I walk into the village head, I will see a bunch of women doing needlework while enjoying the cool in the shade. Those who are topless must be Cheng Bang's aunt and sister-in-law. They put their jackets in the sewing basket and put on their coats as soon as they saw a man coming to the intersection. But for elderly women and children, they are inevitable. Girls who are together should dress neatly and wear a big scarf around their necks. When someone comes, cover your face with a scarf and walk quickly into the house.

When getting married, the bride will wear a red hat. Unlike a scarf, "Meng Touhong" is made of red cloth, which has no light inside and outside. Therefore, only by worshiping heaven and earth, entering the bridal chamber, and the groom taking off the bride's "hood red", can they really meet for the first time.

For the bride and groom, "making trouble in the bridal chamber" is "disaster". According to the custom, this evening, in addition to the elders and brothers, brothers of the same generation and grandnephews of the younger generation are eligible to make a scene in the new house. Some people peek at enough paper, some eavesdrop on the windowsill, and some people bark like cats and dogs to make trouble. Everything outside the house makes the couple nervous.

What's more, a group of buddies will never let you go home unless you are drunk. At this time, the bride can only face the lonely lamp and live alone. Therefore, the miracle of taking the opportunity to "occupy the nest" and "impersonate" also happens from time to time. I heard such a true story when I was a child. When I was in the first grade of primary school, the brother of a classmate in my class got married. In the evening, a group of "girlfriends" invited him to have a wedding reception at home, and then dragged him to Gua Tian to invite everyone to eat watermelon. It was still in the wild until eleven o'clock at night. At this time, a bachelor "buddy" quickly sneaked back to the village unnoticed, gently pushed open the door of the bridal chamber and came up to hug the bride tightly: "Dear, I love you." The bride was so inexplicably slept by others. Then, the bachelor slipped out in the name of going to the toilet. Soon, when the groom comes back, he will take off his clothes and sleep with the bride. The bride said, "You are committing suicide! Just a few times. Now? " The groom was dubious and asked in detail why. The groom was shocked and knew that he had suffered a "dumb loss", but he was afraid to tell anyone, otherwise he would lose his wife and face and be unable to be a man.

In the early days of liberation, although the marriage law was promulgated, the bad habits left over from thousands of years are still operating imperceptibly. The "matchmaker" has been changed to "introducer", and the parents have the final say in the engagement, and the bride price is sent and received. When I went to the relevant department to get a marriage certificate, although both men and women were present, the woman was veiled and could only see two eyes. So the true face of the bride can only be known when she enters the bridal chamber.

With the deepening of reform and opening up and social progress, rural areas, like cities, have fully and thoroughly realized the marriage of free love. Men and women love each other, they are childhood friends, they get along with each other day and night, and they know each other well. No one can live without anyone, and no one can get along well. The arrival of auspicious day, beautiful wedding room, beautiful wedding, inseparable feelings, people envy. Feudal arranged marriage was completely thrown into the garbage dump of history.

The firecrackers outside the house interrupted my thoughts of recalling the past, and I was wishing the couple a happy time!