I want to go shopping when I go to Harbin at Christmas.

Christmas, a month ago, the smell of Christmas has permeated every corner of this city. Every shop passing by is playing songs about Christmas. A few steps away, you can see a stall selling Christmas decorations. Even the salespeople in convenience stores are wearing red and white Christmas hats. Every year around Christmas, the news received on WeChat is overwhelming. In the circle of friends, there are various screenshots of red envelope transfer, Christmas gifts sent by the object and so on. Single friends always have a good place to go, KTV singing, disco dancing in bars, just as chic. But I don't know if many people are as afraid of festivals as I am. In fact, there are very few friends, and several friends are not around and busy in the same city. So every holiday, my normal state is to stay at home and hold the ipad to catch up with the drama, and brush for a minute to update a few lively friends circle. A person doesn't want to go out. When he goes out, he is either abused by a couple or accompanied by three or five groups of good friends. A person is always lonely. For example, at the moment, the coffee shop that often comes is always full, but today it is empty. Waiters wear Christmas hats and say hello to every guest who comes in, but the sentence "Merry Christmas" sounds a little harsh. It doesn't snow in my city. I didn't eat jiaozi on the winter solstice, nor did I eat apples on Christmas Eve. There is no Santa Claus in the dream, and there is no gift when you wake up. My wish didn't come true. I haven't seen the person I want to see. I received a lot of "Merry Christmas", but I was not happy at all. I don't like Christmas. I have no family around me. All the wonderful things belong to others. I only have myself. So Eason Chan sang in "Christmas Knot": "Lonely people are most afraid of festivals."

/02/ I still remember that when I was in junior high school, everyone just had the concept of Christmas Eve, and giving apples became popular in my class. At that time, I didn't know where it came from. It is said that as long as 24 dimes are collected on February 24th, 65438, those who receive this apple will be safe and happy in the new year. It was really stupid and cute at that time. Everyone asked, "Do you have a dime?" A dime that is usually inconspicuous becomes particularly valuable on Christmas Eve. I finally collected 24 small coins and put them in my pocket carefully. As soon as the bell rang, I happily went to the fruit stand and bought a round red apple, then exchanged it with my neighbor or deskmate, or gave it to someone I liked. At that time, an apple was not so expensive, and my aunt who sold fruit at the school gate insisted on giving me one more. I insist on spending only two dollars and forty cents on one. Before leaving, menstruation also said, "Why are you children so strange? Usually no one buys apples. What happened today? " I smiled and told my aunt, "Because today is Christmas Eve, you should eat the fruit of peace!" " ~"? Later, the wind of sending apples on Christmas Eve became more and more fierce. Two dollars and forty cents can't buy an apple. After some merchants touted the packaging, an apple actually sold for 10 yuan and 20 yuan. Although beautifully packaged, it is not sweet at all. Now let me buy another apple. I don't know who to give it to. And those of us who collected 24 coins religiously in those days can't get them back.

/03/ Actually, I really don't like festivals at all. The more lively the festive atmosphere, the more lonely I feel. I always feel that I am out of place with this excitement. I always feel that people in the street seem to be laughing at me: "Hey, look at that man as lonely as a dog." Although I have been alone for many years, every festival will end abnormally. I chatted with my friend last night. My friend was working overtime. He didn't have any food, let alone apples, let alone Christmas Eve. Working overtime continuously made him want to have a good sleep. I suddenly feel a little sad. When did these rituals get forgotten by this damn life? What is safe, not Christmas Eve? You don't have to give gifts for birthdays and holidays. Everything with a sense of ceremony seems to be getting farther and farther away from us. As we grow older, we don't seem to value these things more. I can't say that I don't care at all, but I often compromise in my life and work, and no one around me remembers me. Over time, one gets used to it. But when I see happy faces in my circle of friends, I will still envy them. It's good to be young. I really envy you, there are people around you, there are relatives around you, you can hold hands, you can hug, you can laugh so happily, and no matter how busy you are, you can take time out for the holidays and create small surprises for each other on this dull day. On the other hand, I can't even go to the movies on a date. I envy you, really.

/04/ My friend said that I was so bored. In fact, I also want to be interesting and make some new friends. But I can't seem to socialize, and it's hard to spend time with new friends. Any relationship that needs to be actively maintained makes me exhausted. Life is already so hard. I just want to meet a friend who really understands me. Needless to say, when the new movie is released, she will take the initiative to ask me, "Are there any good movies released recently? Do you have time to watch together? " I am waiting for you. "A new restaurant has opened, and she will ask me," I heard that a new restaurant has opened in that shopping mall. Do you want to try it together? "On weekends, she will ask me out shopping to buy clothes and drink milk tea. I don't know, it's not that kind of relationship, but that she will really remember me, know that I live alone outside, have no friends, often come to my house to see me, take pictures of me when she sees something novel, and say that we will go together next time. In fact, I know that the world of adults is like this. Many relationships are getting more and more alienated. Everyone should take care of work and family. I also know that friends have their own friends and social circles. No one will be unique. However, I still feel that it is really good and happy to have such a friend who can be remembered and remembered. In fact, I really don't like Christmas at all, because my loneliness will be infinitely amplified every holiday. So I hope I can receive apples next Christmas Eve. Next Christmas, I will be accompanied. Next New Year's Eve, someone will accompany me to wait for countdown to zero. I hope it's you. Merry Christmas. -End-

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