This is a joke. It can adjust the atmosphere.

1, the tree will die if it is not peeled; People are shameless and invincible in the world. 2. Sao belongs to Sao, and Sao has Sao Zhen; Cheap to cheap, cheap to dignified, 3 or 0 years old, 10 years old makes progress every day. 20-year-old dream, 30-year-old effort. At the age of 40, he is basically oriented, and at the age of 50, he is popular everywhere. Playing mahjong at the age of 60 and wandering around at the age of 70. 80-year-old lesbians are very common, and 90-year-old lesbians are hanging on the wall! When you were born, you cried and everyone laughed. When you leave, you are smiling and everyone is crying. 5. Stand higher and pee farther. 6. In a few decades, we will meet again, send them to the crematorium and burn them all to ashes. You are a pile, I am a pile, and no one knows anyone. They will all be sent to the countryside to make fertilizer. 7. I met a MM personality signature: I can't play chess and draw, and I am tired of washing and cooking. 8. I met a GG signature: Give me a girl and I can create a nation. 9. I met an old Shaanxi personality signature: ugly women are more troublesome, and black buns are more vegetables. 10, met our teacher's signature: I tell you, the teacher is very angry now, and the consequences are very serious (after his nth blind date failed). 1 1, met a writer's signature: it may look like it, but it may not. 12, I met a lover's signature: I can keep my word, and the person I like has to change every day. 13, met the sleeping king in the class. Personality signature: full at three o'clock in the morning, full at three o'clock in the evening and full at six o'clock before and after meals. We want to fly in heaven, two birds are one, and I want to be a pig in the same circle! 15, don't worry, I see you don't even have an appetite, let alone talk about sexual desire! 16, chopped-do you want a piece? 17. I think I would like it if I came later in the morning. 18, I can't give you happiness, but I can comfort you! 19, life is so fucking fun, because life always fucking plays with me. 20. Buddha said, "Looking back 500 times in the past life, you can only pass once in this life." I would rather pass the world by 500 times in my life. 2 1, I want to puppy love, but it's already late ... 22, my god! My clothes have lost weight again. 23. Don't speak English in front of me in the future, ok? 24, how far is the thought, how far do you roll for me 25, hooligans are not terrible, I am afraid that hooligans have culture. 26, guest officer, please respect yourself, the little girl only sells herself, not an entertainer. 27. A man's lies can lie to a woman for one night, and a woman's lies can lie to a man for a lifetime! 28, water can carry a boat, but also can cook porridge! 29. Zi said in Sichuan, "How nice it is to have a boat!" 30, want a small MM, * * * with irrigation; I irrigate the head of the Yangtze River and you irrigate the tail of the Yangtze River. 3 1, love at first sight, then decline, three points exhausted. 32. A person is not alone, but when he misses someone. 33. Life is simple. Live, relax. Life is not easy. 34, work QQ, decline to chat, talk about strength, every word is hairy; Punctuation marks, half price, 1000 words or more, 20% off; Yan Wen, ten-month subscription, audio and video, not yet provided; Pay first and then chat, chat as soon as the payment arrives, pay online and provide invoices; Free monthly rent, single charge, weekend, business as usual; Looking for an agent, 35. If there is a problem, look for the reason from yourself first. Don't blame the earth for its lack of gravity when you are constipated. 36. Knit me a scarf, and I will repay you with my lifelong care. Otherwise, you can strangle me with a scarf! 37. Men pretend to understand if they don't understand, while women are just the opposite. In order to cooperate with the successful completion of family planning work in China this year, I decided not to contact friends of the opposite sex for the time being. Thank you for your cooperation. 39. Spring can't be caged, so I pulled an apricot out of the wall. 40. Do you think I will watch you die? I will close my eyes 4 1. I thought I was decadent, and I didn't know that my morning paper was scrapped until today. 42. I drown my sorrows in wine, but this damn pain taught me to swim. 43. Everyone else is pretending to be serious, so I have to pretend not to be serious. 44. An elephant asked the camel, "Why do your breasts grow on your back?" The camel said,' Stay away from death, I won't talk to anything with a penis on my face! 45. You should do three important things for the people of the whole country: install an elevator for Mount Everest, tile the Great Wall and put the plane into reverse gear. Three little things: mosquitoes wear masks, flies wear gloves and cockroaches wear condoms. 46. Wife is an operating system, but it is very troublesome to install and uninstall; The little secret is the desktop, you can change it every day as long as you are interested; Lover is the internet, the scenery is infinite, and money is constantly spent; Miss is pirated software, remember to kill virus first when using it! 47. Have you heard? It took 5000 times to look back in my last life before I passed by in this life. In this life, good friends like us, in our last life ... did nothing but turn around! 48. I am 20 years old, everyone loves me, flowers bloom and flowers fall, and the car has a flat tire! I know everything about astronomy and geography above, but I know little about it below. Every time I walk outside, I often bring beautiful women back, and handsome guys jump off buildings! 49. I want to send you roses, but the price is too expensive; I want to comfort you, but I haven't learned it yet; I want to kneel down to you, but the ring is still in the safe. 50. Love is empty, and I wander in the street; People are empty of money, and a single evil cause is troublesome; Things are people, non-industry is empty, and it is crazy to think of it; Life is not easy when the mobile phone is empty and there is no money to charge it; Anyway, all four are empty. 60, fart, bad heart; Do not fart, exercise; I'm going to fart, everyone. Clap your hands when the fart rings! Yan Zhenyu (33261126)15: 32: 49 61,copying books, making sentences and writing compositions-children's affairs are adults' affairs. Love boating as a bosom friend ―― adult's business, children's business. Perm your hair and wear strange clothes ―― a woman's business is a man's business. 62. The early bird catches the worm, and the early worm is eaten by the bird! 63. I argued with MM about whether a whale is a fish. Finally, I said, "I also have a personal word." She agreed that a whale is not a fish. 64. It is said that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. Looking back, I actually streaked in Too Many Cooks for 20 years! 65. Wear other people's shoes, go your own way and let them take a taxi to find it. 66. There is an old legend that people who can see beautiful women on XX campus will live forever ... 67. They are not afraid of enemies like tigers, but teammates like pigs! 68. If the water is clear, there will be no fish, and if people are cheap, they will be invincible! 69. I am not a casual person. I am not a casual person. 70. Today, a group of Japanese came to visit our school-to be honest, this is the first time I have seen a Japanese in clothes! 7 1, I am poor, my servant is poor, my gardener is poor, my driver is poor ... 72, when the bank charges, it says, "This is in line with international practice!" When he was in service, he said: "We must consider China's national conditions!" 73, riding a white horse is not necessarily a prince, he may be a Tang priest; The one with wings is not necessarily an angel, he may be a bird. 74. Being pregnant is like being pregnant. It takes a long time for people to see it. 79. I swallowed an aphrodisiac and the world immediately became sexy ~ 80. If falling in love is falling in love, isn't that hooliganism? 8 1, the sentence "Japanese are human" belongs to: a. metaphor; B. exaggeration; C. metonymy; D. personification 82. Grandpa is from his grandson ... 85. Why do you pretend to be alcohol when you are covered in water? Why do you pretend to be sheep when you are all perverts! 86. All unforgettable love is the moment when the soul is free in bed ~ 87. The Teenage Ninja Turtle said, "If you want to live decently, you have to bring some green on your back!" 88. I sleep on my stomach, which makes me strong on the earth. I sleep on my stomach, which makes me strong in the whole universe! 90. When the night is turned on again during the day, the sun is born ... 9 1. There are only two kinds of men: one is lascivious and the other is very lascivious! 9 1, ① Teacher, just follow the old woman ... ② The old woman is rude, it's your turn ~ ③ Teacher, please spare the old woman! (4) Anitopher, I can't shoot the old woman -_-b 94. Life raped me, I castrated my life ... 95. According to the time law of hormone activity, I came to the conclusion that morning exercises are not as good as morning exercises! 96. God, did you share a room in summer and winter? Give birth to this damn weather! 97. Don't hang yourself on a tree, try to die several times in nearby trees ~ 98. Ma Hua Teng said privately: "It's not good to learn Chinese for ten years and not talk about QQ for half a year!" 99. Leave half when defecating to avoid getting hungry soon ~ 102. About what romantic fairy tales men tell women, there is only one word: bed.