Is it suspected to be poison?

Nothing in the world is difficult for one who sets his mind to it. Suspicion, for example, often causes some inexplicable troubles for no reason. Suspicion confuses people, confuses people's minds, and sometimes even confuses the faces of friends and enemies, and confuses the boundaries between right and wrong, causing losses to your family and leading to career failure.

Think about it, we used to have disputes, quarrels, misunderstandings and even many unjust, false and wrong cases. What has nothing to do with doubt?

In our traditional culture, there are many teachings about suspicion, such as "suspicious people steal axes", "people leave their stomachs", "knowing people's faces without knowing their hearts" and "hurting people's hearts to prevent people".

Suspicious people, not only blindly speculate and doubt others, but also often wonder about themselves. daydreaming is worried about disaster.

Doubt is the cancer of self-worry. My pulse jumped and I suspected that there was something wrong with my heart. Some people have polio, and their necks are a little stiff and scared to death; If you are a little hot, you will pull a long face. Fortunately, most people's worries don't last. But truly suspicious people are always worried that they are sick. They seek medical treatment everywhere and have repeated various physical examinations. Although the examination results don't support the diagnosis of any physical diseases, they don't believe this disease-free report, and still insist on taking the self-feeling of their physical symptoms as evidence of illness. I even bought some medicines that I thought were symptomatic at random and swallowed them in large quantities, which made me feel at ease.

This idiom is used to satirize people who are suspicious. In ancient times, there was a man in the state of Qi who was always worried that the sky would fall and the stars would fall on his head when he walked at night. So I'm always nervous and afraid to go out at night. A group of Muslims in Mecca, the holy land of Africa, always suspected that Star Wars was about to break out and the destruction of mankind was imminent. In order to avoid hearing and seeing the cruel "unwarranted" scene in the future, they fled to the mountains to commit suicide collectively. Doubting everything and believing everything has entered an extremely absolute situation here, and it is extremely easy to confuse the real with the fake, so that such a ridiculous joke is made without rhyme or reason.

A university once conducted a questionnaire survey on 3200 male and female students. One of the questions is: "What are you most afraid of in life?" More than 2,800 students replied: "I am afraid that others will talk about myself behind my back." Such a high proportion shows that most young people always doubt what others think of them. In fact, on the other hand, young people always doubt others in social interaction.

Let's take another look. If two children fight outside in life, two mothers will come out, one is from China and the other is a foreigner. China's mother will probably point at each other and ask, "Why did you hit my child?" A foreign mother may say, "What? Are you unfriendly? "

This shows that two mothers with different cultures will say two different things. It can also be seen that doubt has a great influence on each of us in China, which is the inferiority of our national psychology. If our "long live understanding" is based on doubt, it will never be understood, so long live. Because each of us has been educated and influenced by doubt since childhood, it can be said that everyone has doubts.

To get rid of doubt, we must have a deep understanding of doubt. What is doubt?

Suspicion is based on a subjective imagination that does not trust others and does not conform to the facts, and it is a stumbling block in the process of interpersonal communication. Doubt is the suspicion that all kinds of inaccurate signals converge in a specific life background. Sometimes it can help and finish things, and sometimes it can delay and do bad things. A little doubt about some things that are difficult to grasp, so that you can be psychologically prepared for some sudden disasters in your life, can often avoid some blind and reckless behaviors.

But the serious problem is that some people look nervous, always doubt others, doubt many people and things that should not be doubted, believe many people and things that should not be believed, absolutely doubt everything, believe everything, and fall into the psychological misunderstanding of getting involved in society. Falling into these misunderstandings is also likely to fall into failure in life.

As a complex social psychology, doubt has many reasons.

First of all, because there is no healthy and normal psychological development, no optimistic attitude towards life and strong self-confidence, I am worried, introverted step by step, and often in a state of self-isolation. He doesn't know that everyone has an independent and complete personality world. Where does everyone have leisure to gossip about you? He always uses his narrow prejudice as a yardstick to measure everyone, that is, he thinks everyone thinks the same as him.

Secondly, "selfishness leads to doubt." The "private" here mainly refers to self-awareness, sensitivity to the comments of people around you, and fear that others will say things against them behind their backs, so they are suspicious and fall into a self-defense of self-fear. Longing for respect and evaluation, but afraid of not getting it, suffering from loss and unreasonable suspicion.

Once again, this is a misunderstanding. Everything in the world is complicated, even if the feelings and friendship between the two sides are deep, it is inevitable that misunderstandings will sometimes occur. Therefore, people misunderstand other people's words and deeds, believe gossip, arouse suspicion and form cracks.

In short, ignorance and lack of judgment about people and the world are the main reasons for suspicion, tension, misjudgment and misunderstanding.

A great man once said, "Doubt is like a bat, it always takes off in the dark." People who have doubts often catch some phenomena that can't reflect the essence when interacting with people, use their subjective imagination to doubt, misunderstand others, or have a certain impression on someone before interacting, and use this stereotype to contact each other everywhere in communication. As soon as the other party moves, they will confirm the original prejudice. Although there are various manifestations of doubt, we can find that it has a common feature, that is, it has no factual basis and only relies on its own subjective imagination; Grasping the "fur", ignoring the essence and making one-sided guesses; Don't doubt your own judgment, just believe in yourself, doubt others and criticize others. People who have doubts put themselves in a distressed state of mind, take a distrustful attitude towards others and even doubt their feelings.

Doubt often leads to paranoia. Such people are often sensitive, stubborn, cautious, and demand perfection in everything. This not only harms oneself, but also harms others.

People used to have a good impression on you, or used to be good friends, but you suspect that others are playing tricks on you, talking about you, and speaking ill of you, so you are prejudiced against him, interrupting his contacts, or cutting off his friendship. You can also regard a normal relationship between men and women as an affair.

You can doubt that all letters written by women to their husbands are love letters, and you can also doubt that all letters written by men to their wives are love letters. If there is no handle, it is suspected that it is a spiritual love. Therefore, for a family, suspicion is often one of the reasons leading to marital discord and family division. Because of the husband's unwarranted suspicion of his wife or wife's suspicion of her husband, something happened when there was nothing, and things that were loyal because of being suspected of being unfaithful often happened later. Or, because one side can't stand the long-term unwarranted suspicion of the other side, it produces disgust and trouble, so that the final break often happens.

Few people want to associate with a suspicious person. Most of them avoid you for fear of causing some unreasonable troubles. Therefore, most suspicious people are lonely, but your loneliness is not the elegant loneliness of philosophers-if you want to find a new life and ideas outside the secular world, you are lonely without the help of others, a humble loneliness. You will find it difficult to go everywhere, the energy of life will not be exerted, your intelligence will not be developed, and it will be difficult to achieve anything in your career.

People who are suspicious and bold are extremely rare. Bacon once said that henry vii was such a person. Suspicious people are often accompanied by timid character, which is even more fatal. If you don't overcome this character defect, you can only run your life in a tragic way.

We must realize that doubt is a psychological evil. Doubt runs through the veins of each of us. If we don't take detoxification measures, the consequences will push our whole nation into a tragic abyss like drugs. Where did you get the energy to develop? Suspicion is the bane of "infighting"; Suspicion is an obstacle to turning friends into enemies; Suspected to be a drug that leads to suicide and murder!

The skeptic's way of thinking is self-evident, because he lost something. Judging from his recent abnormal behavior, he must have stolen it.

Therefore, it is extremely important to adjust your way of thinking, whether you are adjusting yourself or treating suspicious friends.

If you doubt someone or something, the easiest way is to talk to that person, exchange your views with him frankly and friendly, and get a real understanding, so as to achieve understanding. Once you understand, you won't hate that person any more.

The way to eliminate misunderstanding is face-to-face communication. This is more convenient and effective than any innuendo, circuitous understanding and indirect hearsay. Suspicious people are often short-sighted, without lofty goals and sincere and kind hearts. Adjust your mentality and get along with skeptics as follows: First, cultivate love. From love for small animals to love for people, suspicion always guesses from the bad side, which is a sign of no love.

Secondly, cultivate the psychological quality of tolerance. Tolerance means acknowledging differences and reducing demands on others. Being able to tolerate others is the first condition to get along honestly with others, because tolerance is a thoughtful cultivation and a magic weapon to remove thorns from the heart.