What is EQ, and where does EQ come from?

The word EQ was put forward as a psychological concept.

1990, two American psychologists, Peter Serawi and John Meyer, first put forward the concept of emotional intelligence. Since then, the word EQ has set off an innovation of human intelligence in the world, and caused a lasting discussion. 1995 10 The New York Times columnist Daniel Gorman published a book, Emotional IQ, which passed the theory of emotional IQ to the public and quickly became a worldwide bestseller.

Americans believe that in the fierce modern competition, the level of emotional intelligence has now become a crucial link. George W. Bush, the former president of the United States, is a guy with a particularly high emotional intelligence. He has a famous saying: "If you can mobilize your emotions, you can mobilize everything!" "

So, what is EQ? Why is there so much energy?

EQ English is EQ, which translates directly into mental wisdom. However, such an answer is obviously too simple to satisfy our thirst for knowledge.

In order to better understand EQ, it is necessary to understand the relationship between EQ and IQ, because to some extent, the concept of EQ is put forward as the opposite of IQ.

So, before we understand EQ, let's take a look at IQ.

Before EQ was put forward, IQ was the primary index to measure a person's ability. As we all know, Einstein has a high IQ, so he became a world-famous scientist. In the nearly 100 years after Einstein, researchers planned a variety of IQ test methods, hoping to cultivate another Einstein.

In the process of discussion, hundreds of millions of people accepted various inspections. Although the seminar is so large and takes so long, many people still ask: Are people with high IQ really more capable than the average person?

In other words, do you only need natural intelligence to achieve outstanding results?

After all, many examples and experiments have proved that people with high IQ may not be successful. In other words, IQ has nothing to do with a person's effectiveness.

In our country, there has always been a child prodigy plot. The so-called prodigy is a child with extremely high IQ. Their intelligence seems to develop rapidly, and their learning effect is always far ahead, and they are even admitted to universities at an early age.

Young college students used to be the existence that China's parents longed for.

The United States also has "prodigies" and is keen on cultivating "prodigies". There was a man named William Binder in his early years. When he was born, his father used various means to develop his intelligence. At the age of 3, he was able to read and write freely in his mother tongue. At the age of 4, he wrote three articles of 500 words, and at the age of 6, he wrote an anatomical paper. On the morning of primary school entrance, he was enrolled as a first-year student. A month later, when his mother came to pick him up again, he was already a third-grade student.

That doesn't count. Binder entered middle school at the age of 8 and entered the university campus at the age of 1 1. When everyone thinks that Binder's brain is smart enough and his IQ is not high, the future effect will be infinite. But to everyone's surprise, after graduating from Binder University, there is nothing special. On the contrary, because I entered the workplace too early, I didn't know how to get along with others, and I was made difficult by my colleagues. Later, he ran away from home and worked as a shop assistant. He was incompetent all his life.

There are countless examples of this. In ancient China, there were also stories about Shang Zhong Yong. When you are young, you are smart, but when you are old, you will eventually disappear from the world. Most of the so-called prodigies are fleeting.

At the same time, people with high IQ will do wrong things, do bad things, and even break the law. For example, the bear throwing incident in Liu Haiyang, Gao Fei and Tsinghua, many students from famous universities committed suicide by jumping off buildings under various pressures, and hacked their classmates to death angrily because of a trivial matter? The words and deeds of too many favored people are shocking.

Aren't these students clever? Don't know how to deal with the problem?

In fact, the source of the problem is not their IQ, but that they don't know how to control their emotions and adjust their psychological conditions, so when faced with various problems and difficulties, they choose the most extreme approach.

With the myth of high IQ shattered, people can't help wondering: Why do people with high IQ fail and break the law? Shouldn't they be the smartest and most successful people among mankind?

When people began to question IQ extensively, EQ came out. Emotion, emotion and other non-intellectual factors were initially ignored in the field of psychology, but later they became the focus of psychological research.

The discussion about self-control and how to face the ups and downs of life has unveiled the mystery of emotional intelligence for us.

On the basis of traditional intelligence, people put forward emotional intelligence quotient, which is a subversive break. Emotional quotient (EQ) involves people's stability, cheerfulness, excitement, constancy, courage, sensitivity, doubt, fantasy, sophistication, anxiety, independence, self-discipline, anxiety, etc. It is an exploration of the connotation and strength of life.

Emotional intelligence has therefore entered people's field of vision, and people's discussion of emotional intelligence is like opening a hidden treasure house of the human body.

It has been found that the tragic dramas of those people with high IQ could have been avoided, and maybe they could have achieved better results in the future, but because of their low EQ, they finally got a job that makes people feel sad.

Emotional quotient (EQ) is closely related to each of us in life and work. A person with high emotional intelligence is easy to succeed in work, be happy in marriage and be in interpersonal communication?

Learn to read between the lines and learn to read what you say.

China people don't like to speak frankly, but they like to beat around the bush. Sometimes they are sarcastic, sometimes they sound very concerned about you, but they are actually criticizing you euphemistically. This is really a great test of a person's emotional intelligence.

In communication, people often evaluate a person as "unable to understand others' words", "unable to understand others' words" or "having no eyesight". No matter what kind of comments, they are all saying that this person's emotional intelligence is too low. A person who doesn't know how to read between the lines will never know where he is wrong even if he makes a big mistake.

There was a county magistrate in Qing Dynasty, who was sent to Shandong Province, and I met Jun Fu for the first time. According to the convention, it is necessary to wear embroidered robes when meeting officials, even on a hot day (the so-called embroidered robes are the official uniforms of Qing officials, made of satin, usually with a sandwich, depending on the size of the official rank, ranging from five pythons to nine pythons. The supplementary service is a plug-in added to the embroidered robe. As it was a hot summer, the county magistrate just sat down in the hall of Fu County, sweating and unbearable, so he picked up the round fan he carried with him and waved it wildly. Jun Fu thought he couldn't stand the heat, so he said, "You are so afraid of the heat, why don't you take off the plug-in?"

The county magistrate said, "Yes, yes." So he asked his servant to help him remove the plug-in. After a while, Jun Fu waved his fan as usual and said with a smile, "Why don't you understand the bandwidth robe?" Fu Jun's implication is that the county magistrate is to blame for fanning the flames in front of him. Unfortunately, the county magistrate still said, "Yes, yes." So get out of your seat and take off your robes one by one. Back to his seat, the county magistrate laughed and laughed in front of Fu Jun, unconsciously switched the electric fan to his right hand, and from his right hand to his left hand, constantly switching back and forth, making the electric fan rustle. Jun Fu was angry at his impudence, so he narrowed his eyes and sarcastically teased him and said, "Why don't you take off your shirt? This is even cooler. " The magistrate took off his shirt as soon as he answered. Seeing that he was so ignorant and rude, Jun Fu immediately handed it over and said, "Please have tea." Jun Fu or so immediately paged "Fujian".

Due to the adaptation of the Qing dynasty officialdom, the subordinates met the chief executive, and the chief executive did not want to continue talking, so he signaled with "tea". At one end of the tea bowl, the attendants shouted "Fujian" and asked the guests to resign immediately. When the county magistrate heard "Fujian", he was too anxious to put it on. He hurriedly took a hat and put it on his head, with a robe under his left arm, a rosary on his right elbow and a jacket, and stumbled out, just like playing a clown in a zaju. Your honour in the military department giggled and bent down. As soon as the county magistrate returned to the mansion, the signboard that the government instructed him to go back to his hometown to study was now hanging high outside the door.

This county magistrate ended up like this because he was "stupid" and could not accurately understand the real purpose of the speaker. This is the lack of ability to identify other people's moods, and it is the embodiment of low emotional intelligence. Some people say that the county magistrate can't understand others because he is "stupid", so can "cleverness" save such people's lives?

Yang Xiu was a famous genius in the Three Kingdoms period and Cao Ying's masterpiece. He is a famous sensitive official and a famous wit who dares to offend Cao Cao. It was because of Yang Xiu's arrogance and repeated taboos against Cao Cao that Cao Cao finally found a reason to kill him. Later generations have a poem lamenting Yang Xiu, including two sentences: "What is wrong is only the cause of death, not the desire to abdicate." This is in line with Yang Xiu's point of view.

The death of Yang Xiu stems from his "wisdom".

Yang Xiu's IQ is really high, and it's no exaggeration to be brilliant. However, it is also true that his emotional intelligence is low.

It was because the IQ was too high and the EQ was too low that it finally killed him.

Some people think that Yang Xiu is "smarter than himself". In fact, Yang Xiu's cleverness is not really clever, because really clever people know how to grasp the psychology of others and safeguard their own interests.