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How to build good interpersonal relationships essay reference
Abstract: For a long time, school management has been in favor of institutionalized management, and lack of rational thinking about non-institutionalized management, classroom management is also the same. As the idea of "humanistic management" continues to emerge in the science of school management, interpersonal relationship is also increasingly recognized as a new point of view in the science of school management. This paper tries to find a new way to optimize classroom management through the interpretation, recognition and construction of classroom interpersonal relationship, so as to serve the reform of education and teaching.
Keywords: interpersonal relationship; management effectiveness; classroom management
Classroom management is both a science and an art. How to improve the efficiency of classroom management, so that the science and art of classroom management organically united, is a major topic for every educator, especially classroom teachers to think about, but also our new period of classroom management work should be pursued as the ideal goal.
How can we realize the idealized classroom management mode we seek? The author believes that the entry point is to improve interpersonal relations in the classroom, establish a "student-oriented" thinking, fully mobilize and play the majority of teachers and students to work and study the enthusiasm and initiative to promote the majority of teachers and students in the education and teaching process of reciprocity **** student, and ultimately achieve the optimization of classroom management.
1. Harmonious relationship between students
Students are the masters of the class, the harmony of the class is first of all the harmony between students, students are both learners in the collaborators, competitors, but also on the life of friends and partners. Good or bad classmate relations for the construction of a harmonious class, harmonious campus has an important impact, not only affects the ability of students to deal with interpersonal relationships, mental health level, but also affects the cohesion of the class group, centripetal force. The vast majority of today's students are only children, pampered, selfish and narrow-minded, arrogant and capricious, self-righteous, self-centered and other faults prevail, so internal class conflicts are inevitable. If not properly dealt with will certainly affect the classroom style, affecting the class harmony. I instill the concept of "cherish fate, value friendship, be kind to others, minimize conflicts, and be tolerant" in every student. To help each other between students, mutual care of good deeds more publicity, positive guidance. Create a democratic and equal educational atmosphere. Through the heart to heart class meeting to discuss students, criticism and self-criticism and other forms of guidance to students. Let students learn to respect, learn to understand, learn to unite, learn tolerance and friendship, learn to think differently, and to have others in mind, the heart of the collective as the highest norms for dealing with interpersonal relationships to regulate their own behavior, creating harmonious relationships between students.
2. Harmonious relationship between teachers and students
Teacher-student relationship is the most basic and important relationship in school education activities, and it is the core content of creating a harmonious class. Teacher-student relationship is harmonious or not on the whole process of education and teaching plays an important role in constraints. To achieve harmony between teachers and students, it is necessary to establish a correct teacher-student relationship. There is an old Chinese saying that "one day as a teacher, life as a father", which probably summarizes the traditional harmonious teacher-student relationship. The new teacher-student relationship is based on democracy and equality. In this relationship, teachers and students are equal in personality, mutual respect, mutual learning, teaching and learning. Teachers are the collaborators and guides of students' learning, and they are the friends of students. How to establish a new type of teacher-student relationship "also teacher and friend"? How to achieve harmony between teachers and students? I think the classroom teacher should always adhere to this concept of education: respect for students, to protect the legitimate rights of students, to create a democratic and equal space; appreciation of students, encourage students, to create a personalized development, every day upward space; care for the students, love and care for the students, to create a mutual love and support for the space. And should always pay attention to regulating the psychological distance between teachers and students, put down the administrator's frame, into the middle of the students, care for the students, listen to the students' voices, think about what students think, anxious students anxious to solve the problems in the learning and life of the students, and strive to do the students' mentor and friend.
3. Harmonious relationship between teachers
Harmonious class, inseparable from the harmony of the teachers. To create a harmonious class can not be separated from the unity and cooperation of teachers, relying on the class teacher alone is far from enough. Classroom teachers should create their own and classroom teachers, classroom teachers and classroom teachers between mutual respect, mutual understanding and friendship, unity and cooperation of the harmonious relationship. Strengthen the communication understanding and respect with classroom teachers. Listen to the suggestions of teachers, help them to build up their prestige, assist in improving teacher-student relations, resolve conflicts between teachers, and do a good job of coordination, and never favor one over the other. Only when we think together and work together can we maximize the effect.
4. Recognizing the "student-oriented" new thinking of interpersonal relationship management in the classroom
Humanistic management thinking gives inspiration to classroom management: In the process of classroom management, only by firmly establishing the idea of "student-oriented" can we give full play to the enthusiasm and initiative of each type of children, and ultimately achieve the goal of optimizing classroom management.
Treating people-oriented children, we must be realistic and affirm their strengths and advantages, so that they are full of confidence, and continue to forge ahead for better results; at the same time, we must analyze what they do, so that they can see their own shortcomings and deficiencies in front of the results, so that they always keep a clear head and effectively overcome the mood of complacency. In addition, it is necessary to teach them the general skills and techniques of interpersonal communication, guide them to take the initiative to contact other students, not to stray from the class group, and to reciprocate with other students***sheng, ****same development. For intermediate children, our methods are: first, use the advantages of intermediate children, reasonable arrangement of their work, so that they reflect their own value in the work, thus prompting them to transform in a good direction; second, absorb intermediate children to participate in classroom management, so that they in the process of practicing to enhance their confidence, recognize the role of inter-personal coordination, and thus consciously and voluntarily to get along well with others; again, carry out Again, we carry out a variety of after-school activities and encourage them to participate actively, so that they can feel the power of the group and the charm of unity in the activities. To deal with the dislike of children, we have to pay attention to the method, because this part of the children and the class group psychological distance, to the teacher and other students with rejection and resistance, and often in the "broken cans" in the psychological field, self-esteem is very fragile. Therefore, to help these children construct good interpersonal relationships, we must do the following: First, we must respect them and protect their fragile self-esteem; second, we should always use a "magnifying glass" to find the "flash point" on them, trying to make the dislike of children can see their "light and hope"; third, other students, first of all, the class teacher should take the lead in accepting dislike of children, eliminating their fear. Thirdly, other students, first and foremost the class teacher, should take the lead in accepting the disliked children and eliminating their fear. Through a variety of effective methods, the psychological distance between the disliked children and other students and teachers gradually narrowed, and further to achieve psychological "friction".
5. Specific methods to optimize interpersonal relations in the classroom
There are many ways to build good interpersonal relations in the classroom, and here are a few effective methods.
5.1
Situational inculcation method. The so-called mood inculcation method is to create a classroom cultural atmosphere, so that students in a harmonious atmosphere, feel the charm of the collective, and thus consciously and voluntarily in the heart of the class to produce a kind of centripetal force. This method has a subtle effect on the improvement of interpersonal relations in the classroom. Using this method, we must pay attention to the following points: (1) Strengthen the construction of class culture, and strive to create a harmonious cultural atmosphere. Specific measures include the development of class conventions, posting slogans reflecting the mainstream culture of the class, regular replacement of the class magazine, the establishment of a record book of good deeds and regularly summarize the assessment. (2) Strengthen the construction of classroom style. Class style is a reflection of the class spirit. Practice has proved that if the class spirit is positive, the interpersonal relationship will be harmonious, the cohesion of the group will be strong, and the collective will be able to realize its maximum potential in this state. It can be seen that strengthening the construction of classroom style is of special importance to improving interpersonal relations in the classroom is of special importance to improving interpersonal relations in the classroom. (3) Forming correct collective public opinion in the class. Public opinion is a kind of mass opinion, which has a certain normative effect on the words and deeds of every member in the class collective. In a certain sense, public opinion has an irreplaceable role in coordinating interpersonal relations in the class and encouraging positive spirit.
5.2
Strengthen mental health education. The physical and mental harmony of people is the basic condition of social harmony. With the economic and social development, people's work and life rhythm accelerated significantly, all kinds of competition is very intense, increasing mental pressure, some people will inevitably be psychological and spiritual impact, and produce different degrees of psychological entanglements and conflicts, resulting in psychological disorders, mental illnesses have gradually increased, many people silently endured the torment of mental illness.
According to the statistics of the relevant departments, people with various psychological disorders and mental illnesses account for about 20% of the total population. To establish harmonious interpersonal relationships and build a harmonious society, we must strengthen mental health education, advocate the concept of harmony, cultivate the spirit of harmony, and cultivate self-esteem and self-confidence, rationality and calm, positive and enterprising, healthy and upward social mentality. To carry out colorful recreational and sports activities, mental health education in the activities, effective regulation of people's emotions and psychology, to eliminate the sense of melancholy, loneliness, sense of loss and other bad emotions [3]151, so that their mental health, happy mood.
5.3
Promote traditional virtues and cultivate noble sentiments. The traditional virtues of the Chinese nation is the essence of the morality of the Chinese nation formed and developed in the long course of history, and is the sum of the manners of the Chinese nation, which is the core of the fine ideological and cultural traditions of the Chinese nation. To establish harmonious interpersonal relations, we must promote traditional virtues and cultivate noble sentiments. In the traditional virtues of the Chinese nation, honesty and trustworthiness occupy an extremely important position, integrity as a basic moral requirement, has been inherited in Chinese culture for thousands of years, to establish people in good faith, to establish the country in good faith, in good faith for development. Harmonious interpersonal relationship should be a relationship of honesty and friendship, honesty is the basic requirements for people to get along with each other, is the premise of friendship. Without integrity, there will be no trust and understanding between people; there is no friendly care, there is no way to talk about social harmony.
5.4
Criticism and self-criticism. Criticism and self-criticism is one of the three fine styles of our party. The purpose of carrying out criticism and self-criticism is to uphold the truth, correct mistakes and enhance unity. Engels pointed out that "unity does not exclude mutual criticism. Without such criticism it is impossible to achieve unity. Without criticism, you can not understand each other, and therefore can not talk about unity."[4] 423. within the people, from the desire for unity and harmony, through the development of criticism and self-criticism, right and wrong, eliminating barriers, correcting errors, resolving contradictions, so as to achieve a new unity, the establishment of harmonious interpersonal relations.
5.5
Strengthening and improving ideological and political work. Comrade Hu Jintao pointed out in the report of the 17th Party Congress, "Strengthen and improve ideological and political work, pay attention to humanistic care and psychological guidance, and deal with interpersonal relationships in the right way." [The words "humanistic care" and "psychological guidance" appeared for the first time in the report of the National Party Congress, a highlight that reflects the people-oriented purpose of ideological and political education and the innovation of keeping pace with the times. In order to establish harmonious interpersonal relations, we must adhere to the people-oriented principle of understanding, respecting and caring for people throughout the entire process of ideological and political work, focusing on both ideological and political education, as well as humanistic care and psychological guidance, avoiding the accumulation of undesirable mentalities, guiding benign changes in the social mentality, and helping people to achieve psychological harmony in a subtle way. We should pay attention to people's feelings and needs in various aspects, and guide people to strengthen their own cultivation, improve their spirituality, and perfect their personality. To combine the solution of ideological problems with the solution of practical problems[3]153, to do good and practical things for the masses, to reduce the worries of the masses, and to fully mobilize the enthusiasm of the masses, in order to enhance the cohesion of the unit and department, and to strive to improve the efficiency of the work.
References
[1] Shao Ruizhen: "Educational Psychology" Shanghai Education Publishing House
[2] Wang Jianhua: "The Theory and Practice of Ideological and Political Education" Central Literature Publishing House
Establishing Good Interpersonal Relationships Essay Part II
Abstract: Good interpersonal relationship is the basis for the healthy development of contemporary college students. First of all, college students must be guided to establish a correct concept of interpersonal relationships. Positive engagement and heartfelt interaction is an effective way for college students to establish good interpersonal relationships, and effective interaction cannot be separated from a positive mindset such as a sincere heart, a kind heart, a caring heart, an equal and respectful heart, and a tolerant heart. Improving personality cultivation is the key to establish good interpersonal relationship among college students.
Keywords: college students; interpersonal relationships; mentality; pathway
I. Improving the understanding of interpersonal relationships is the foundation for the establishment of good interpersonal relationships among college students
(I) Introduction
Interpersonal relationships (humanrelations) are the direct psychological relationship or psychological distance between people in the process of activities. Human relations reflect the psychological state of people seeking to fulfill their needs. According to statistics, in addition to sleep, college students spend about 70% of the rest of the day on interpersonal communication, which shows that interpersonal communication plays an important role for college students. College students are in the golden period of their life, their study and life can not be separated from interpersonal communication, and the healthy growth of college students can not be separated from interpersonal communication. Therefore, the establishment of good interpersonal relationships among college students is the need of college students' life, the need of going to the society in the future, and also the cornerstone of their future career development and life happiness.
(2) The significance of interpersonal relationship
Friendship, a bright light of college students' life. College students long for friendship, hope that the rich and colorful interpersonal communication, so as to enrich their knowledge of life, understanding of life, exchange of emotions, learn to deal with the world, establish themselves, and gain self-confidence. Interpersonal communication is a necessity for college students. Therefore, good interpersonal relationship has great significance. First, it promotes individual development. Interpersonal relationships play an extremely important role in the development of individuals. Marx has long pointed out that "the development of man depends on the development of all other men, directly and indirectly." College students in the process of interpersonal communication, "people in the mirror", you can understand their own strengths and weaknesses, but also through the attitudes and evaluations of others on their own, a comprehensive and objective understanding of themselves. Second, to obtain a variety of information. The process of establishing interpersonal relationships is first of all the process of communication between the two sides of the interaction, information exchange and communication is an important way to obtain knowledge. A person directly from the books to learn the knowledge is limited, even if it is the head of the poor, rich in learning, in the modern society, the tide of new information is only a drop in the ocean. Through interpersonal communication, we can directly communicate information, enrich knowledge, exchange ideas and improve people's understanding of knowledge in a more rapid way. Thirdly, it enhances physical and mental health. Good interpersonal relationship is very important to personal physical and mental health. Confucius once said, "It is not pleasant to have friends from afar." In the process of growing up, college students need to socialize with others and get spiritual support, get understanding and relief from friends, so as to get a sense of security, satisfaction, and improve self-confidence. On the contrary, dysfunctional interpersonal relationships often cause psychological imbalance, which can easily lead to physical and mental illness. Fourth, to adapt to social needs and build a harmonious society. Good interpersonal relationship among college students is to lay a good foundation for their future society. College students come from all over the country, they have different customs; college students come from different families, they have different temperament, personality, interests, hobbies and needs, learn to live in harmony with a variety of people, in order to adapt to more complex interpersonal relationships in the future to the community, to live in harmony with the public, to build a harmonious society. Family and all things prosper, the nation and the nation to live in harmony, the country is prosperous, the country and the country to live in peace ****, the world is peaceful. Fifth, promote academic progress and career success. "Learning alone without friends, lonely and little heard." College students communicate with each other, will enable them to produce new sparks in the collision of ideas, promote academic progress, increase their positive views on career, life, success, and help each other between friends, it will help career success. Throughout history, the success of many celebrities and aspirants is inseparable from their good interpersonal relationships. Li Shimin of the Tang Dynasty understood the truth that "water can carry a boat, but it can also cover a boat", so he cared for his subjects and was embraced by them. The success of Li Bai, who praised friendship, "The peach blossom pool is not as deep as Wang Lun's love for me", owes a lot to Wang Lun. The success of Marx and Engels is also inseparable from their mutual concern and help.
Second, heart to heart is an effective way for college students to establish good interpersonal relationships
Psychological research shows that a positive and healthy interpersonal atmosphere is an important condition that affects interpersonal relationships, which is a positive and effective way to actively engage in heart to heart interactions. Interacting with a positive mindset of sincerity, kindness, caring, equality and respect, and forbearance will help shorten the distance between people and enhance mutual communication.
(A) Sincere heart
Mengzi believes: "The acquaintance of people is valuable in knowing each other, and the acquaintance of people is valuable in knowing the heart." As the saying goes: "watering flowers watering roots, handing over the heart," which is the key to a good relationship, only handing over the heart in order to make people feel sincere. Sincerity is the bridge of communication between people, only with the heart for the heart, treat with sincerity, in order to make both sides understand each other, establish a sense of trust, and then form a deep friendship. Sincerity, that is, to be sincere in the world, sincerity, to speak the truth, do practical things, sincere attitude, people really, not hypocritical, not lying. Treat each other with sincerity. Sincerity can move the other party, so that the relationship is not so good, such as the famous historical "generals and", sincere heart can also eliminate misunderstandings, so that the relationship between people is more beautiful.
(2) equal heart
Equality, mainly refers to the equality of the attitude of the two sides of the interaction, each of us has its own independent personality, dignity and legal rights and obligations, personality of everyone is equal. In the interpersonal communication of college students, physical age is not a problem, social status is not a gap, family background should not be an obstacle, the gap between rich and poor should not be the weight of the scale, respect for seniority should not be words. The friendship will last long if you are equal in heart and treat everyone the same.
(C) respect for the heart
"Respect for people, people always respect; love for people, people always love". Respect for others, value others, will also gain the respect of others. Everyone has self-esteem, want to be respected by others, and respect for their own people have a natural affinity and sense of identity, give others enthusiasm, in fact, is to give others support and encouragement, can greatly enhance the other side of the self-affirmation. Comparing heart to heart, other people feel respect at the same time, will also respect the heart of the relative. Respect for the heart, is built on the basis of psychological equality, respect can bring benign feedback, throw me to the wooden peach, in return for the qiong yao. "The fire that warms others will also warm yourself."
(D) Tolerance
Tolerance and generosity, cheerfulness, magnanimity, broad-mindedness, is a higher realm for people in the world. "Tolerance is great, no desire is just", "generous cluster of friends", "big belly can tolerate the world's intolerable things", these are the benefits of tolerance and generosity, the performance of a lot of: to people on the friend Seek common ground while reserving differences, do not treat people with their own special personality or hobbies; can tolerate the faults of friends, do not remember the past; can humbly accept criticism, take the initiative to check, but not overly decorative, shirking responsibility; in small matters, not to be calculating, nagging; can listen to a variety of views, so that they are more sensible. Suffered "crotch humiliation" of Han Xin, to repay the grudges, turning enemies into friends; Duke Huan of Qi, regardless of personal enmity, appointed to shoot him an arrow of Guanzhong for the phase, achieved a generation of hegemony; Liu Xiu, Emperor Guangwu, "do not repudiate dissent, do not think of the old and the bad, love and tolerance for the masses, the knot of grace in the subjects," so that the Han dynasty rose; and so on. Han Dynasty; and so on, these emperors and generals of tolerance and generosity, it is worthwhile for us to think about and learn from.
(E) tolerance
This is an important attitude of good interpersonal relations. People get along with others, get into the endurance. "Gentlemen endure people can not endure, tolerate people can not tolerate, at the people can not be," "endure a moment of calm, one step back to the sea and the sky". When other people's harsh words, bad behavioral attitudes hurt themselves, to endure. Tolerance, to be clear, the classics have said, "the first people are not good, do not know morality, no words, no blame." This is because others have not been educated in this area, do not understand, so no wonder; endure, but also to take into account the overall situation, in order to collective unity, in order to family harmony, to endure, can let go of the time to let go, to forgive and forgive, may wish to advocate the "sufferings are blessings," the spirit.
Three, improve their own personality cultivation, is the key to establish good interpersonal relations between college students
College students in the process of interpersonal interactions, often reflecting a person's moral character, thoughts and feelings, personality temperament, education, attitude to the world and even the relationship between the mood, that is, the individual's own cultivation will be embodied in socializing, which requires that the college students should be enriched in their own inner world, from This requires college students to enrich their inner world, from instrument to speech, from image to knowledge, multi-directional to improve themselves. The personality qualities that are conducive to college students' interpersonal interactions are mainly as follows:
(a) Integrity and honesty
Integrity is to be decent, not to engage in crooked hearts. It brings friendship, trust, admiration and respect. Integrity of people to express their views, regardless of grudges, frank and open; dealing with issues, adhere to the principle of impartiality; for people in the world, upright, justice; treating people, decent manners, noble character. Honesty is the sister of integrity, only honesty, can make people feel at ease, get the trust of others. Zhou Enlai once said: "People who think they are smart often do not have a good end. The smartest people in the world are the most honest people, because only honest people can stand the test of facts and history."
(ii) be kind-hearted
Being kind to others is the essence of traditional Chinese culture and the traditional virtues of the Chinese nation, helping others is to help oneself, taking a loss is to take advantage of the social nature of human beings and ****existence generates the mutual attraction of human beings and the affinity need for love and compassion and friendship. College students in the process of interpersonal communication, to be goodwill, psychological often think of others, collective good, social good. Because you good, I good, everyone good is really good. Because of goodwill, there is a good attitude, there is good behavior.
(C) mouth to say good words
Interaction with others, we should say more good things about others, the use of smooth, cordial, elegant, appropriate language, more praise others, more appreciation of others. American psychologist William? James pointed out that: "praise can make the weak body become strong, can give the terror of the heart to calm and dependence, can let the injured nerves to get rest and strength, can give people in adversity to seek success determination." It was once reported that a peasant woman in Guangxi learned to speak "thank you", "you're so nice", "you're really great" and other words of praise for other people and some daily phrases in many languages, and as a result, many foreign travelers sought her out as a tour guide. As a result, a lot of foreign travelers came to her as a tour guide. Be good at saying thank you generously. Sincere thank you from the heart flashes the glory of humanity.
(D) the body to do good things
"Do not take the good small, do not take the evil small,". Do more good deeds and help others. Psychologists have found that to help and help each other to start relationships, not only good first impression easy to determine, and the psychological distance between people can be quickly shortened, so that good interpersonal relationships quickly established. The psychological effect of the so-called "snow in the charcoal", "icing on the cake" is also very much needed.
(E) optimize personality
In the interpersonal communication of college students, paranoia, obsession, conceit, suspicion, low self-esteem and other personality barriers to interpersonal communication. Therefore, transforming bad personality, cultivating and optimizing good character is an important aspect of establishing and developing good interpersonal relationships. China's psychologist Huang Xiting studied the personality traits of college students who have good interpersonal relationships: respect for others, responsible for their work, loyal and honest, enthusiastic and cheerful, helpful, independent and humble, with a wide range of interests, optimistic and humorous, dignified and refined, the good character traits have a considerable personality charm, easy to make people have a lovely sense of affinity, and thus greatly promote the development of interpersonal relationships.
References:
[1]He Jincai, Tang Wentjie. Mental Health and Development of College Students [M]. Hangzhou: Zhejiang University Press, 2005: 93.
[2]Marx, Engels. The complete works of Marx and Engels (Volume 3) [M]. Beijing: People's University of China Press, 2000: 515.
[3]Zhang Hongru, Cao Yuping. Psychology of contemporary college students [M]. Beijing: Capital University of Economics and Business Press, 2004: 259.
[4]Bao Wei. Psychological quality and modern life [M]. Changsha: Hunan University Press, 2001: 150.
[5]Bao Wei. Psychological quality and modern life [M]. Changsha: Hunan University Press, 2001: 151.
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