A complete book of etiquette from engagement to returning home

On the third day after marriage, the bride will go back to her mother's house with the groom and gifts, commonly known as "going back to her mother's house". The following is compiled for everyone: from engagement to returning home etiquette, welcome to read! Please stay tuned for more details.

Engagement etiquette

To a certain extent, both men and women agree to choose each other as life partners and are generally engaged. At this time, the introducer communicates the situation of both parties and agrees on the bride price (mainly clothes and money). When engaged, it is often the man who, accompanied by his elders, brings the pre-agreed bride price to the woman's house. This situation is also called "visiting at home". "Visiting children" is also called "paying bride price" or "paying bride price".

People generally pay more attention to "visiting children". During the "door-to-door visit", the woman's relatives, friends and elders were present, and several tables of banquets were set up. After the "bride price", the man will get the "kitchen money" for this table banquet. After liberation, the engagement ceremony was once very simple. Some men and women agree to be partners for life, take an engagement photo and exchange souvenirs with each other. Some men invited the lady, her parents and referees to their home, held a banquet, and gave her gifts and money after dinner.

Nowadays, the engagement process has been gradually valued, and some men and women hold engagement ceremonies separately. When visiting children, it is mainly the man who gives the bride price to the woman. In addition, both parties usually buy each other a set of high-grade clothes and shoes. The man gave the woman "three golds", namely, gold rings, gold earrings and gold necklaces. According to their own conditions, the old man also gave 99 yuan or 999 yuan to the future "daughter-in-law" as a "meeting gift", with the intention of giving it to the future "daughter-in-law". Now the quotation of "10 1" or "100 1" also means one percent or one thousandth. The woman also gave the man a gold ring. When engaged, the introducer is often present, and the bride price is handled by the introducer. Besides the dowry, jewelry and money should also be given at the wedding. )

In the future, if one party does not agree to "divorce" (that is, "divorce"), then the bride price will be treated according to the custom of "divorce": if the man proposes "divorce", he is not allowed to ask for the bride price and property given to the woman during the "visit"; If it is proposed by the woman, the dowry and property paid by the man must be returned in full at the time of "home visit". At this time, the introducer played the role of a notary here.

It should be said that from the beginning of "visiting", even if the marriage relationship between the two families is formally settled, it will generally not be easy to go back on our word.

After the engagement, both men and women can go to each other's house at will from dating behind their backs to getting along openly and fairly, and have frequent contact and deepen their understanding. Love has entered a new stage.

Wedding etiquette

When a man and a woman are in love, they reach the legal age of marriage. If both parties agree to get married, they can go to the medical and health department designated by the government for physical examination. After passing the examination, they can go through the marriage registration formalities in the civil affairs department of the government, get a marriage certificate, and then hold a wedding. Holding a wedding, commonly known as "holding a happy event", is the most grand and exquisite wedding ceremony. Although the government has repeatedly advocated thrift, it often does a lot of things.

Set a wedding date

The traditional etiquette is that the man looks for someone to "see the day", chooses "auspicious day", determines the wedding date, and then informs the woman directly or through an introducer. Once the wedding date is set, it will not be changed easily. This change is considered to be unfavorable to the man's parents. Nowadays, the date of marriage is often decided by both parties. Wedding dates are generally chosen on holidays, such as May 1 ST, July 1 ST, August 1 ST, November 1 ST, New Year's Day and other festive and memorable days. Because there are holidays, there is time. There are many days when the solar calendar and the lunar calendar meet in pairs, which means in pairs; There are also homophones for good luck, such as June 6th (June 6th), August 8th (development), September 9th (everlasting), May 17th (I want a wife), May 27th (I love my wife) and September 17th (I want a wife). Due to the influence of feudal superstition, some people also find someone to choose a special day.

Premarital preparation

After the wedding date is determined, it is necessary to purchase furniture, household appliances, decorate new houses, buy wedding dresses, choose wedding dresses and take wedding commemorative photos. Both parties designate the best man and maid of honor, notify relatives and friends, and the host (usually the man) will book hotels and vehicles, and hire the host and guest to make video recording, photography, salute, band, wedding venue and other matters.

Before the wedding, the following preparations must usually be made:

Four bride price: a piece of meat sent by mother; 4 green onions; 2 kg of vermicelli; Two bags of cotton and sugar. The four bride price is a gift that the groom must take to the woman's home when he picks up the bride. It takes a knife to leave the mother's flesh and blood and two ribs to show that although the daughter left her mother and got married, she was still connected with her mother and did not leave her mother. Green onions should take root and sprout, indicating that life is rich and children are smart and reliable. Pink and sugar indicate a sweet and long marriage. Among the four kinds of betrothal gifts, there are carp (2-4 pieces), rice flour (2 pieces), wine (2 bottles), sugar (2 packets), cigarettes (2 pieces) and tea (2 generations), which are not considered as four kinds of betrothal gifts because they must be taken from the mother's meat and green onions.

Red carpet (1): used when the bride changes makeup and sits happily.

Red ribbon (2): When the bride wears makeup, the bride and groom tie each other.

Red shoes (1 pair): The bride likes to wear them in the car.

Wedding flowers: flowers for groom, bride, groomsman, bridesmaid, witness, host and guests 1, flowers for wedding ceremony (parents of both parties), and some flowers for guests.

Flowers (3 bunches): The groom presented 1 bunch of flowers to the bride, and 2 bunches of flowers were presented to the bride and groom during the ceremony.

Wax-loving (4 pieces): used for bride's makeup and wedding night.

Whip (not less than 8 hooks): put 1 hook in the car, put it in the woman's house, and put 2 hooks in the new house, hotel and ceremony.

Salute (18-21): The bride and groom will fire their guns when they get off the bus or get married. (Generally, wealthy families have this arrangement.)

Happy characters: large size-two new doors and two hotel doors; Zhong-welcome car 1 car1; Trumpet and artistic words-a few, posted indoors in the new house.

Wedding couplets (2): used in new houses and ceremony venues.

Flower raising (6th generation) colored strips (6 barrels): used by the bride and groom when getting off at new houses, hotels and wedding ceremonies.

Head flower (several): the bride makes up.

Mother-in-law flower (1): The bride wears it for her mother-in-law.

Hairpins (several): spare when mother-in-law wears flowers.

Flower Basket (1): used for ceremony venue. (You can use the flower basket in the car)

Red paper (10 sheets): used to cover manhole covers and fruit bowls.

Fruit candy, cake, melon seeds, cigarettes: used for reception of new houses, rostrum of ceremony venues, and gift tables.

Double happiness cigarettes and matches (several): used by the bride and groom when toasting.

Le Ballon Rouge (20 cars): 2 trailers for 1 cars.

Photo albums (at least 4): used for photography of the whole wedding process.

Axe (1): The bride and groom change their makeup and use it when they are sitting happily. The axe is preferably mahogany, and red paper can also be cut. )

1-2 sets of gift books, pens and gift bags.

Red envelopes for the man's family: the bride changes her mouth, presses the kang, presses the car, changes shoes for the bride, hangs the door curtain, hangs the clock, lights the bride, rewards the dowry, and is used by newly-married children, car lovers, chefs, photographers, cameramen, groomsmen, bridesmaids, children offering flowers, owners and guests. Prepare some mobile phone red packets.

Red envelopes for the bride's family: the groom will change his mouth to light a cigarette, hold the bride's waist down, enjoy the happy car, give the bride gifts, and reward the chef when adding vegetables. The bride will give them to her sister-in-law and brother-in-law at the same time, and prepare 1 pack of coins to use when catching the word fu.

The woman has fruit candy cakes and melon seeds at home; 1 noodles, 2 poached eggs (for the bride and groom); 1 Hang the whip and like to enter; 1 cornucopia and 1 red scarf; A number of red handkerchiefs (if you throw a car, give it); There are 1 door curtain, 1 wall clock, 1 weight (for hanging door curtain and wall clock).

Souvenirs exchanged by the bride and groom.

Matters agreed by both parties in family communication.

Before the wedding, the man's family and the host should pay a courtesy visit to the woman's house to communicate the situation and solicit opinions.

Matters that need to be communicated and agreed by both families are as follows:

(1) Determine the number of people attending the wedding (led by an elder), the number of people attending the wedding and the number of children.

(2) How to get rewards when there are several vehicles to see relatives off.

(3) Agree on the time for seeing the bride off, vehicle route, bridal chamber (bridal chamber), wedding ceremony and agenda. Make it clear that the ceremony of changing makeup and taking photos in the woman's house and sitting on the bed in the bridal chamber should not exceed 1 hour; The ceremony lasts 20-25 minutes.

(4) Reward communication: the bride and groom exchange money and pay for the kang, the bride's shoes, the bride's car, the curtain and the wall clock, the bride's children, the dowry, the bride's gifts and the bride's food.

(5) Executive witnesses, wedding celebration spokespersons, children offering flowers, and flower flogging personnel.

(6) Return: 2 green onions and 2 waxes.

(7) The deacon of the woman's house and the guest of the man's house shall communicate with each other directly. Emphasize that the best man carries gifts for the groom and opens and closes the door for the bride and groom to get on and off; Bridesmaids assist the bride in making up and changing clothes; The groomsman and maid of honor laid a red carpet for the bride, lit candles, made preparations for exchanging tokens and toasting, and took care of gfd of the bride and groom at any time.

(8) Issues involving customary communication, taboos or precautions of both parties and other related matters.

wedding ceremony

On the eve of the wedding, the groom spends the night in the newly decorated house, accompanied by unmarried brothers or nephews, commonly known as "pressing the bed" and "warming the house".

On the wedding day, from the early morning, gongs and drums were played in front of the man's house, red couplets were posted on the door, and the word "Xi" was posted on indoor and outdoor doors, windows and furniture. Set up fireworks and firecrackers in the shape of "88" or "99" in front of or outside the gate. Early in the morning, the flower shop installed the bridal shower car. The word "Xi" was pasted on the windshield of the bridal shower car, and "Le Ballon Rouge" was hung on both sides of the door of the bridal shower car. The bride gets up early to make up and is accompanied by a bridesmaid to wait at home.

(1) The groom changes clothes. The groom changed his clothes in the new house, wearing red and flowers. The mother entrusted her son to a family. At the wedding (the groom's parents), both the host and the guests wear wedding flowers.

The wedding motorcade set off. The groom, led by his elders, accompanied by the best man, introducer, relatives and friends and the wedding host, took flowers, four bride price and money for shoes to the wedding reception by bus. One person is responsible for taking the flowers of the bride and groom, the flowers of the best man and bridesmaid, the flowers of the bride's parents, two red belts, a pair of red shoes, a red carpet, four wedding candles and a whip. The best man sat down to pad the groom with an axe and set off a set of firecrackers. If you have a drum team, please play together. Every village across the bridge along the way set off firecrackers. Close people deliberately detour to show their glory. The wedding team walked near the woman's house and set off firecrackers to inform her. The woman's family greeted her outside the gate, and the wedding service staff got off.

(3) the groom changed his mouth and called the door. The groom walked ahead with a gift in his hand and changed his name to "Mom! Open the door ",be sure to call it several times (called" hold your temper ",and so does the woman when she goes to the man's house). After the mother-in-law opened the door, the groom bowed to his father-in-law. Mother-in-law took the gift, changed her mind to reward her son-in-law, and then asked the guests to wait in the living room, where they were served with rock tea candy, and the introducer introduced the kinship between the two sides. When welcoming the guests into the house, the groom asked the bride to open the door and presented her with flowers.

(4) The bride changes makeup. The bride's parents wear wedding flowers. The best man and bridesmaid put on the red carpet, lit candles and put green onions. The best man put money on the red carpet, and the bride put on makeup on the red carpet. After the bride wears makeup, the bride and groom tie red ribbons and wear flowers for each other. The best man and the bridesmaid wear flowers for each other. The bride's family took a group photo with the bride and groom.

(5) eat happy noodles. The bride's mother cooks a bowl of noodles, puts two poached eggs, and the bride and groom share a bowl of noodles.

(6) The groom lights a cigarette for the elder of the woman's family, and the elder rewards it with money; The elders rewarded the bride with money to press her waist. (More picky people have this arrangement)

(7) Bride grabs happiness: The bride scatters coins on the red carpet, and the bride grabs money and puts it in a washbasin wrapped in red cloth, commonly known as "cornucopia". The bride carries the basin, and the mother entrusts her daughter.

(8) Happy Car Return. The groom gets on the bus with the bride on his back, changes the bride's shoes, the bride's brother picks up the old shoes, and the groom gives a red envelope. The wedding staff brought back the red carpet and two love waxes and two green onions. The woman's family rewarded the wedding car with money and set off firecrackers in return. Along the way, the bride's parents, rickshaw drivers and other relatives accompanied her to her husband's house. When a girl gets married, the woman's family will usually accompany several large dowry items, such as high-end furniture and household appliances. All dowries should be tied tightly with red cloth strips and arrive with the car.

wedding ceremony

(1) Welcome car to pick up new relatives. The happy car goes to the man's house to set off firecrackers, the bride and groom get off the bus, and young men and women present flowers and spray colored strips to the bride and groom; The man's family received a new relative and a dowry; Pay the driver, pay the car.

(2) The bride changed her mind and called the door. The bride changed her tune in front of the new house and called "Mom! "Open the door, even called several times. After the mother-in-law opened the door, she gave her daughter-in-law a red envelope with a cornucopia. There are also cases where the bride changes her mind, her mother-in-law receives a cornucopia, and the bride and groom give their daughter-in-law a red envelope when they get off the bus. )

(3) The daughter-in-law wears flowers for her mother-in-law. After Dai Xihua, the daughter-in-law gave gifts to her in-laws, and her mother-in-law rewarded a red envelope. (There are also people who collect cornucopia and Dai Xihua to enjoy red envelopes. )

(4) Curtains and wall clocks for new houses (new houses); The bride's brother died, and the man's family gave him a red envelope.

(5) the bride is blessed; The bridesmaid lays a red carpet, the best man puts an axe under the carpet, two sisters-in-law arrange the bedding, and the bride gives two sisters-in-law red envelopes; Brother-in-law pulled the bride out of bed and the bride gave her brother-in-law a red envelope.

(6) The bride lights cigarettes and offers tea to the elders of the man's family, and the elders give money to the bride. (More picky people have this arrangement)

(7) the elders of both sides meet and recognize their relatives; The groom's parents give money to the newborn child and dowry money to the woman's family.

(8) The man's family takes a family photo. Friends, relatives, guests, and newcomers take a group photo.

wedding ceremony

(Arrange the bride and groom, sound engineer, photographer, cameraman, firecrackers, flower sender, marriage certificate, keepsake and drinking utensils; At the wedding ceremony, witnesses, leaders of the bride and groom, relatives and friends, and guests' representatives wear wedding flowers and take their seats on the wedding podium.

(1), the wedding celebration begins, music is played and firecrackers are set off;

(2) present flowers to the bride and groom;

(3) The witness issues a marriage certificate to the bride and groom and delivers a marriage certificate speech; (The bride and groom bow to the witness, and the witness issues the marriage certificate to the bride and groom)

(4), hold a ceremony to worship the church: (1) to worship the high hall; Second, worship guests; Three couples worship)

(5) exchange of tokens;

(6) Raise a glass and drink;

(7) Congratulations and thanks:

The host (the bride's parents) made a host speech;

Congratulations: speeches by leaders of the bride and groom, representatives of relatives and friends, and guests;

The officiating person (the groom's parents) gives the officiating speech and a thank-you speech;

The bride and groom talk;

(8) Have a drawing room.

Hold a wedding banquet

The wedding is over and the festive banquet begins. The new parents have their own new seats, and the new seats are in the right position. At this time, the bride will open an account. During the dinner, the band played music, the guests sang and entertained, the chef added vegetables to the new relatives, and the new relatives rewarded the chef.

At the wedding reception, the bride and groom, accompanied by the host and the groomsman and bridesmaid, propose a toast and light cigarettes to the guests. When toasting, the bride and groom propose a toast to the bride and light a cigarette in order of seniority. When toasting other guests, if there are many guests, the host requires one or two representatives from each table to be lit by the bride and groom. After the couple broke up with the guests, the man's family saw them off at the gate of the hotel.

have a family reunion dinner

After the guests left, the groom's house was surrounded, the bride toasted her in-laws, and the man's house had a reunion dinner.

In the evening, you should light the wedding wax brought back from your mother's house and put the green onions in the new house. The bride and groom want to eat jiaozi and noodles. Jiaozi is called Descendants jiaozi, and noodles are called Longevity Noodles (some are also called Comfort Noodles). Then I started to make trouble in the bridal chamber. The traditional custom of making trouble in the bridal chamber is that the bride and groom's sister-in-law and aunt make bedding for the couple, and at the same time throw dates, chestnuts (meaning that your son has a baby early), peanuts (meaning that the girl's son arranges flowers), soybeans (meaning that there are many children and likes golden beans) and wooden piers (meaning that the children grow strong) on the bride and groom's bed. Now, on the wedding night, there are many programs for young people and the bride and groom to play together. They are very creative and interesting. Often stay up late into the night until the bride and groom repeatedly beg for mercy. Home for civil servants:

Huimen etiquette

On the third day after marriage, the bride will go back to her mother's house with the groom and gifts, commonly known as "going back to her mother's house". Because this is the first time that my daughter has come home after marriage, and it is also the first time that a new son-in-law has officially visited her parents-in-law's house, so the woman's house is more grand in reception. At the banquet, the groom sits first, accompanied by the close relatives and friends of the woman's family. There is no limit on the number of days of residence when you return home. The woman's family often entertains guests and friends during her daughter-in-law's "going out of the province to return home".

After one month of marriage, the bride will go back to her family's "home" for an unlimited number of days.

On the first Spring Festival, the groom will bring gifts and his wife to his parents-in-law on the second day of the first month, which will not exceed the sixth day of the first month at the latest. The bride and groom should prepare gifts for the bride's immediate family. Elders and relatives usually hold banquets and give money to new people when they come back.

Matters needing attention in wedding

1, the wedding personnel and wedding vehicles are singular when they go and singular when they return (intended to be paired). When you arrive at the woman's house, go back to the new house, turn inward (plan not to go out), and don't take the repeated route (plan to get married this time).

2. Four bride price gifts are hung in red packages, and axes and weights are wrapped in red cloth.

3. When the bride and groom wear red ribbons, they should not tie knots.

4. Before the ceremony, the bride and groom get off the bus and immediately get off the bus (this time they plan to get married and get the car).

5, like wax, don't blow it out (meaning that life is old, life and death are together, don't blow it away).

6. When the bride grabs the blessing, try to catch it, but don't catch it completely (meaning to leave the blessing).

7. When the happiness car returns to the happiness car, crosses the intersection or crosses the bridge, the bride waves a red handkerchief outside the window (meaning to add happiness to happiness).

8. Cover the manhole cover near the new house with red paper.