How to communicate with parents who have more feudal ideas?

There are many reasons for the generation gap. To sum up, they are mainly divided into physiological, psychological, social development, role differences and other reasons. Physiologically, teenagers are in the developmental stage. Their physical strength and intelligence develop rapidly. They are good at sports and dare to innovate, but they lack endurance. Adults' physical and mental development has reached its peak, and they have a comprehensive and mature understanding of life and society, attitudes and The concept has been basically fixed and lacks change. Psychologically, adolescents in adolescence have an increasing self-awareness and a need to think independently. They are prone to impulsivity and influence from others. They desire independence and recognition from adults and society. On the contrary, adults are fully mature psychologically. Their personalities also tend to be stable, and their hopes for their children continue to increase. They are accustomed to using their own lifestyle and way of thinking to demand their children. Nowadays, the puberty of some children coincides with the menopause of their mothers. Mothers in menopause are prone to mood swings and mental stress. Coupled with the complicated work and family burdens, they become "flammable and explosive" bodies with heavy psychological burdens. . From the perspective of social development, the two generations grew up in different social environments and have different abilities to adapt to environmental changes. A parent's worldview and outlook on life may be far different from what a child thinks. In addition, the two generations have different abilities to adapt to environmental changes. Changes in social concepts, social environment, nature of work, lifestyle, interpersonal relationships, etc. have a greater impact on the previous generation. They cannot adapt to the development of this era quickly, while Teenagers in this era can quickly integrate into this era and accept new things quickly, which leads to friction between the two generations. Furthermore, the roles played by the two are different. As parents, we have to bear certain social responsibilities and fulfill our obligations to raise and educate our children. They have high expectations for their children and hope that their children will be obedient and capable. Teenagers, on the other hand, are in a position of being educated and protected, and their demands are easily ignored, especially the doting of their parents, who are often regarded as shackles by them. There is a kind of ability called communication - bridging the generation gap requires parents to make more efforts. Poor parents in the world, who doesn't want a father to be loving and a mother to be kind, and for their children to be obedient and promising? In order to have a harmonious family and shorten the generation gap, parents need to make more efforts, especially mental preparation. Acknowledge the generation gap: When facing the generation gap, don’t avoid it, but face it head on. In fact, there is no need to care about the generation gap in life. Everyone has their own preference for the so-called vegetables and carrots. The ideological generation gap needs to be collided in communication, and the individuality can be stimulated in the collision. There should be no hurt feelings between the two generations. Otherwise, not only will communication be impossible, but the gap will deepen. Timely communication: Conversation is the best and most direct way of communication. Parents should take the initiative to create conversation situations, create a communication atmosphere, and "exchange hearts" with their children. This kind of conversation must be based on equality between both parties. It is best for parents to participate as friends. They should not use a feudal paternalistic attitude and reprimand their children condescendingly, otherwise the sense of distance between them will increase. Loose requirements: Appropriately lower the requirements for children. Having too high demands on children will cause psychological pressure on the children, causing them to regard the family as a "concentration camp." Parents should strive to create a relaxed and harmonious environment for their children, and should not evaluate and demand their children according to their own likes, dislikes and standards. Mutual respect: Don’t give your children excessive love, but give them an “emotional private space.” Adolescent teenagers long for independence and have a certain ability to criticize and evaluate things. Therefore, they do not want to take orders from adults, but like to criticize and resist authority and tradition. They urgently need to be respected by their parents and the people around them, and their independent intentions and human dignity are recognized. Excessive protection will make children irritable and resistant, and revenge and rebellious psychology will become increasingly serious. Learn to accept: When dealing with our children, we should learn to make the best of the situation on the basis of acceptance and tolerance. In family life, parents must learn to accept each other's attitudes and opinions. This kind of acceptance is not passive, but after truly understanding whether the other party's opinions and attitudes are reasonable, then you can sincerely give up your own opinions and accept the other party. Or, it would be even more pleasant to learn from each other's strengths and integrate the opinions of both parties. Because they are not deeply involved in the world, teenagers often have an idealistic attitude towards things. They are easily frustrated when encountering setbacks and are easily influenced by others. They consider problems one-sidedly and even act on impulse. They lack rationality and have unclear boundaries between right and wrong. Parents must understand these changes in their children and adjust their roles in a timely manner, changing from an "authoritative" and "nanny-like" relationship to a "friend-like" relationship. Seek common ground while reserving differences: If certain differences between two generations are extremely difficult to reconcile, then parents should seek common ground while reserving minor differences, understand and respect their children's living habits, interests and hobbies, and never impose their own preferred model on the other party. . Keeping pace with the times: In modern society, technology is changing with each passing day and information is changing instantly. Teenagers do not have old ideas and models. With their sensitivity, identification and acceptance of new culture, they are bound to be ahead of their parents. Parents should take the initiative to learn, keep pace with the times, and strive to establish a common language with their children. In order to find out the reason for his child's obsession with the Internet, a father went online with his son and discovered the fun in it. After the "playful father" gained recognition from his son, he "education through play" with his son and established a good communication channel.