What is the essential reason for the lack of etiquette culture among college students in today's society?

China has enjoyed the reputation of "ancient civilization" and "country of etiquette" since ancient times. However, the etiquette education of college students in China is obviously lacking, and their civilized accomplishment and behavior are worrying. This paper analyzes the causes of college students' etiquette anomie, and puts forward its own views on the significance and ways to strengthen college students' etiquette education. Keywords: Etiquette Education and Etiquette Cultivation of College Students The so-called etiquette is the code of conduct used to restrain oneself and respect others. It is a way and means to express one's respect and understanding of others through specific behavior and language. It is the sum total of people's code of conduct in long-term social life, influenced by historical traditions, cultural education, customs, religious beliefs, the development of the times and other factors, with the main goal of establishing a harmonious relationship between people. It is not only the external embodiment of a person's inner cultivation, but also a way and skill of interpersonal communication. China is famous for its ancient civilization and etiquette. In ancient times, "etiquette" once became a means of social adjustment together with "law", and etiquette was also one of the precious treasures of China traditional culture. However, at this stage, the etiquette cultivation of Chinese college students is hardly optimistic: all kinds of rude, rude and uncivilized phenomena often appear on campus. The author believes that strengthening college students' etiquette education in the new period has far-reaching social etiquette education significance, which is conducive to establishing good interpersonal relationships between college students and others, forming a harmonious psychological atmosphere and promoting college students' physical and mental health. The communication activities of any society are inseparable from etiquette. The more human beings progress and social life becomes more socialized, the more people need etiquette to adjust social life. Etiquette is the premise of interpersonal communication and the key to communicative life. With the growth of age and the change of living environment, the self-awareness of contemporary college students has made new progress, and they are very eager for real friendship and emotional exchange. College students are generally far away from their parents in their hometown, live a collective life, and are on an equal footing with other students, losing their previous dependence on their parents' "blood relationship" and "unconditional". Therefore, it is necessary for college students to get friendship through interpersonal activities, adapt to the new living environment, develop from a "dependent" person to an "independent" person, and successfully enter the society. In fact, during college, whether you can establish good interpersonal relationships with others has a very important impact on a person's growth and study. Longing for friendship and emotional communication is an important psychological feature of college students. But there are also many college students who show the tendency of "self-isolation" to varying degrees. There are often emotional experiences of "loneliness" and "no friends". There are many reasons for this. There are two common reasons. On the one hand, I didn't really understand what friendship is, and I didn't really get out of the interpersonal communication mode of "dependence on others" and "inequality" formed in the early interpersonal communication process. In the process of interpersonal communication, I show the tendency of "attaching to others", "using others", "taking the individual as the center" and "seeking perfection and blame", which deviates from the fundamental principles of friendship "selflessness, equality and respect". On the other hand, they lack social skills, are not good at expressing their feelings and ideas, are not good at understanding others' feelings and ideas, and lack the same hobbies, which leads to frustration or narrow communication scope. The result of long-term development is loneliness, lack of friends, and some psychological obstacles, which are not conducive to the healthy development of psychology. Let college students learn the basic norms and knowledge of social etiquette, help students master communication skills, accumulate communication experience, learn to follow the principles of mutual respect, honesty and sincerity, and moderate words and deeds in communication, so that they can quickly approach the communication object and feel your familiarity, understanding and respect for them. Practice shows that good interpersonal communication helps to improve college students' self-confidence and self-esteem, reduce frustration, relieve inner conflicts and anguish, vent anger, depression and pain, and reduce loneliness, loneliness, emptiness and praise. These are very beneficial to the physical and mental health of college students, and will also enable college students to avoid the generation of bad emotions to the maximum extent. If they have bad emotions, they can effectively persuade them to leave. At the same time, social etiquette itself is a special language. If college students learn and master the basic knowledge and norms of social etiquette, they can successfully open the door to various communication activities and establish harmonious interpersonal relationships with them. In this way, it is not only the main way to form a good social and psychological atmosphere, but also has an extremely important psychological health care function for college students. Through social etiquette education, we can further improve our etiquette quality, cultivate our practical ability to deal with rewards, develop good etiquette habits, have basic civilized education, and let the flowers of civilization bloom everywhere. If everyone speaks etiquette, our society will be full of harmony and warmth. Thus, the fundamental goal of social etiquette is to educate and guide all citizens to consciously abide by the socialist politeness and moral norms and the corresponding forms of social etiquette, improve people's awareness of civilization, develop people's habits of civilized behavior, promote the formation of good social customs, and achieve a high degree of harmony and order between people and society.