164All defense mechanisms are lies we tell ourselves to avoid pain.

The first article of "Habitual Avoidance - What Are You Afraid of" "Freud revealed the human pain mechanism and summarized it into an objective law, named "defense mechanism". Psychologist Donald Melzer

Explaining defense mechanisms: “All defense mechanisms are lies we tell ourselves to avoid pain.

” I still remember that when I first transferred from a traditional insurance company to an insurance intermediary platform, my superiors encouraged me to go out and socialize more. However, because I had no sense of belonging to the new environment and a deep fear of performance, I unconsciously felt that I was not active.

, I find a bunch of high-sounding reasons for not taking the initiative or taking action, such as the fact that my children are still young and I have to focus on taking care of them, for example, my husband doesn’t want me to work so hard, etc. If I feel at ease with the current situation that I don’t want to go out, I don’t.

The difficulty is that when I see the outstanding people around me doing well in their professional fields, my heart is constantly in turmoil, and negative emotions such as anxiety, entanglement, and self-blame are always entangled in me.

The colleague sitting in the other corner of the office is probably a more proactive person. After hearing our conversation, she pointedly pointed out: "Teacher XX, he thinks this situation is very good now.

Why are you talking so much to her?

Instead of just listening to her talk about all these things, it would be more valuable and meaningful to go out and meet more customers.

" Her words really stimulated me: You are an outsider and you don't understand my situation, why do you say that! But at the same time, I am extremely clear that when emotions arise, it is also when God comes to give me a gift.

It's up to you whether to open the gift or not. It's normal to have your own defense mechanism, but if it causes trouble in my life, then I need to re-experience and think about it. How did it come about?

What direction do I want to go in? What do I say at that time? I may not get better, and it will inadvertently lower the energy of others. Lying to myself can help me become myself.

The person you want to be? The answer must be no. After that time, when you feel pain inside, you will first check if there are any other undiscovered defense mechanisms.

It helps me understand more and more about myself, and I become clearer and clearer. This is the biggest gift that Teacher Li Guocui has given me. Okay, that’s it for today’s first article. I hope you’ll read it.

Your article is inspiring.