The child is born to their own mom to wait for the month, or the mother-in-law to serve?

Many people will face this problem when they are pregnant, and there are many such examples around Jingmai, where the couple are working in Beijing, and they are pregnant, and need to be taken care of by their elderly family members, so whether it's the mother-in-law or their own mother? In the end, the mother-in-law and the mother to come together, most of them will have a different degree of conflict; set to let the mother-in-law to come, some serious to the mother-in-law before the full moon to leave; set to let the mother to come alone, will be slightly better.

In fact, this issue is really a big problem, need to analyze and consider the couple in the pregnancy sensible, and then decide, or it is easy to make the month do not do well, the family is also unhappy.

On the whole, Jingmama think? It depends on the individual circumstances? , depending on who is more suitable for the mom and mother-in-law.

After all, there are a lot of influencing factors, such as the health of the elderly, the availability of time, whether it is too far away, etc., of course, we should also ask the elderly wishes, and they are discussed before deciding.

On the matter of the old man coming to wait for the baby, Jingmai combined experience to give the new parents the following suggestions.

1, if the conditions allow, it is best to be their own mother to come.

Husband's a colleague, the first ten days is in-laws serve, every day quarrel, can not get along, in-laws were angry away, the middle of the mother came a few days, the results of her father accidentally injured hospitalized and rushed back to take care of her father, the last ten days really can not help, the husband still have to go to work, and temporarily find a sister-in-law to save the day.

A total of 30 days a month, the results of her sitting a month, the whole with the war like, the whole family is disturbed.

In fact, Jing mother around there are really many such examples, mother-in-law and mom at the same time to take care of the month, and finally the two old people have been unhappy; also some of the mother-in-law to take care of the month, but not to the full month of the mother-in-law to give up and go away. The first thing you need to do is to get your mother-in-law to come to the table and to take care of you, and then you'll be able to get to the table.

Beijing mother advice:

Postpartum mothers, already because of the decline in hormones, prone to emotional problems, coupled with the birth of the baby, frequent breastfeeding, poor rest, can not go out and so on, it is even more prone to emotional depression. From this point of view, family members are to think more for the mother, avoid anger during the month.

If your own mother takes care of you, your mood will be different and you won't think too much about each other, you won't be able to count on each other; many mothers-in-law take care of you, in fact, there is nothing wrong with you, because you think too much, communicate too little, and make the whole family very unhappy. From this point of view, if your mom can come, it's best for her to take care of you.

2. You have to be grateful to the old man who came to take care of you.

Cousin's aunt was not in good health when she was having her baby, so her mother-in-law came to take care of her, who was almost 70 years old at the time. The mother-in-law is older, not so clean, and sometimes the practice is a bit traditional, not skimming the oil soup and do not add salt, cooking every meal is a big stew.

But in spite of this, she is still very sympathetic and grateful to her mother-in-law, telling me that it is not easy for an old man of her age to take care of her when she is pregnant, so she tries to do as much as she can, and she tries to take care of the children by herself at night, so that her mother-in-law can take a good rest in the other bedroom.

Beijing mother advice:

Mother-in-law take care of the month, eight or nine out of ten will be contradictory, but if from the beginning of the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are correct mindset, a lot of can be avoided. As a late generation, whether it is their own mother or mother-in-law to take care of the month, we should be grateful. Especially the husband, but also during the month, to play a full role in communication and coordination.

Many couples who work in big cities have their parents come from their hometowns to take care of them, leaving their familiar surroundings and coming to their children's side to take care of them, the mood is happy, but it will take time to adapt to life and bond with their children, and it's not easy to think about it.

3. It's best to have a sister-in-law if you have the means to do so.

A colleague's last month, his mom took care of the month, and his mom took care of her in the same way she would have taken care of her, and during the month, he couldn't wash his hair or take a bath, he couldn't eat salt, he couldn't eat fruits, and he ate eggs three times a day. However, my mom was stubborn and felt that she was doing it for her own good, and there was nothing wrong with that. In the end, it took a lot of effort to get through, and it was hard to get through to the full moon.

Elderly people take care of their children, usually according to the traditional way of taking care of the children, but the children agree with the science of taking care of the children and the science of parenting, so it is very easy to take care of the contradiction.

King mom suggested:

This problem, you can hire a sister-in-law to solve, after all, the sister-in-law is professionally trained, and more experience, they have them in the middle of the coordination and care, it will save a lot of work.

But we need to remind one thing is: please ask your wife to be reliable, it is best to look for an acquaintance who has been introduced to you. This will save you a lot of trouble, and sometimes what is recommended by the organization is not always good.

4, during the month, the family division of labor should be clear.

A friend, after getting married, did not live with her mother-in-law, during the month is the mother-in-law over to take care of her, she is also considerate, in advance of the sister-in-law, the child naturally sister-in-law to take care of more, and then she found that her mother-in-law is very lost, so that her husband and her mother-in-law to communicate with the mother-in-law, only to understand: her mother-in-law feel useless, come to take care of it also can't help.

Then she called her mother-in-law, her sister-in-law, and her husband together in the evening, and gave them a clear division of labor: the sister-in-law was mainly responsible for taking care of the children, the mother-in-law was mainly responsible for making soup and cooking (she is usually a very good cook), and the husband could help take care of the children when he got off work.

Finally, we got the words out of our mouths, and things naturally worked out. My mother-in-law cooks dinner every day, and teases the kids with my sister-in-law, so everyone is happy, and she's become more relaxed.

Beijing mother advice:

Must arrange a good division of labor in advance, the old man is responsible for what, the sister-in-law is responsible for what, how to coordinate the husband, etc. In fact, all the original intention is the same, are for the good of the mother and the baby;

The discovery of the problem should be communicated in time to solve the problem, don't hold back the sulking, or each other guessing, this will only aggravate the conflict, and is not conducive to the success of the project, but also to the development of the project. This will only exacerbate the conflict, and is not conducive to family harmony, so that both sides are harmed, and no one is good.

King mom rant so much, I really hope to be able to give to the new parents-to-be some advice, so that the new mother to sit properly, after all, pregnancy and childbirth is really not easy. The new mother will be able to do a month of peace of mind and comfort, the new mother's physical recovery, the baby breastfeeding are beneficial.