What's it like to have a husband with a different personality mindset?

I feel that I am an emotional, impulsive person, feel that others are not positive enough. 17 years just started a business, work, family big and small things are grasped by themselves, feel so tired. My husband's family didn't help, and sometimes I reflected on it, is it really because I didn't let them do it? However, it is clear that they do not come to help ah, especially my husband, like to play games, watching him play games I am disgusted. Obviously I am very busy here, as if I did not see. Things do not say never take the initiative to do. The simplest of the original placed in the door of the garbage bag are not by the way downstairs.

But, life, sometimes will collide with a different spark, I will ask myself, really someone will think so, with the age of many is to rely on their own sense, sometimes not the same as why is not my lucky?

I also deliberately online to search, the following from the thawing of an article:

The same marriage, the same thing, the same claim, if by the husband and wife of different people to tell, the message is often not quite the same. The same thing can be said about a couple of different people, but the message is not quite the same.

Why is it that "the man says the man is right and the woman says the woman is right"? In my opinion, this is not necessarily a subjective and deliberate action, but there are several important objective reasons:

First, men come from Mars, women come from Venus. Whether we recognize it or not, men and women are not quite the same in their way of thinking, but it is very objective.

Secondly, most couples in real marriages have complementary personalities. And almost every disagreement and quarrel is basically due to a challenge to the balance of complementary personalities.

Third, the best couples are subconsciously bound by their families of origin. The influence of this family is not only in the personality of the individual, but also in the growth of the self and the family of origin, and ultimately affects the emotional reliance of the couple.

Fourthly, there is a saying that the benevolent see benevolence, the wise see wisdom, everything itself is multi-faceted and multi-dimensional. In addition to the dimension of the human mindset mentioned above, there will be two dimensions in time and space. That is, the same thing, at different times, standing in different places to see, the results are often different.

First, an example. In the reality of marriage, we often encounter such a problem. Husband and wife, due to a small matter had a dispute, after the dispute the man chose to leave home, while the woman stayed at home and cried and cried.

Why is this? In addition to the fact that women tend to value family and marriage more than anything else, it's also because women and men don't think the same way at this point in time.

Women will think:

Well? You are not even willing to fight with me now, you certainly do not love me, began to hate me, think outside the womanizing ...... me aggrieved, do not allow me to nag a few words? You a big man can not be a little open-minded let me a little? You said you would love me for the rest of my life? You're a liar! I want to divorce you!

But in fact, men often think like this:

Women, is trouble! This is also tube that also tube, sesame seed point of small things, have to be on the line, have to be divided into sub ugly c and d, have to nag you in the ear all day long, I am busy all day back at home is not a quiet ...... Well, since you like so much to make a scene, then you'll make a scene to go? I can't afford to make a noise, but I can't hide?

In these two ways of thinking, the woman is always focused on the details, accustomed to the warmth of the euphemistic "lower thinking", accustomed to along the time and the development of things for the smooth thinking.

They will think about how we were, how we are, and how we are going to be in the future. They may even think that since we are already married, there is nothing more to say between the two of us.

Based on this way of thinking, women tend to be more obsessive and serious about their emotions than men, and are more willing to show their closeness to a stable relationship in front of outsiders than men. They don't even mind revealing their problems and weaknesses in front of other people, especially the man they love.

This mindset of women, while seemingly positive to the improvement of gender relations, is both emotional and righteous. But in reality, in the marriage, but often show a capricious mania, sensitive suspicious and trivial pessimism, and most often can not withstand the reality and the test of time, and ultimately not able to do.

Men, on the other hand, are not quite the same. They are accustomed to the objective rationality and value of the interests of the premise of "superior thinking", accustomed to a kind of results-oriented, results-oriented reverse thinking.

They think, "You can't argue with me, but I'm not going to get anywhere if I argue like this, so I'm going to go out for a while, and come back after this.

Why is this so? Because, men are particularly troublesome, are particularly concerned about status, rights, freedom and dignity. They often do not have enough patience for marriage and spouse, they do not like to expose their own problems, not willing to show weakness, will be particularly good face, and even less willing to accept the so-called psychological counseling.

Then again, very often, women always complain that men only talk and do not do, saying that they only know how to talk a lot, do not know how to feel sorry for women, will not comfort women. Why is this so? Because men do not know, in fact, women more often, not need a result, but only an emotional listening and companionship, or emotional recognition. And the more uninterested a straight man is, the more likely he is to be "impressed" in this regard.

Based on this, many marriages in fact do not have much of a problem, only that men and women are not born with the same way of thinking, and both men and women lack a kind of change for each other, so that the way of thinking towards compatibility of the enlightenment and perseverance.