Traditional Culture Encyclopedia - The 24 Solar Terms - Self-regulation 8 coup to be the master of emotions
A happy mood can be the driving force of career and life, while a bad mood will affect physical and mental health. So, how to keep a clear hea
Self-regulation 8 coup to be the master of emotions
A happy mood can be the driving force of career and life, while a bad mood will affect physical and mental health. So, how to keep a clear hea
A happy mood can be the driving force of career and life, while a bad mood will affect physical and mental health. So, how to keep a clear head when you are emotional? I will teach you eight ways of self-regulation, learn to control your emotions rationally and be the master of your emotions.
1, avoidance method
When people are in psychological difficulties, the first and easiest way to take is to avoid. Avoid and avoid external stimuli that lead to psychological difficulties. In psychological difficulties, people's brains often form a strong excitement center, and avoiding relevant external stimuli can make this excitement focus give way to new excitement centers caused by other stimuli. The excitement center moved and got rid of the psychological dilemma.
? Do you mind not listening? It is said that this is the truth. For example, trivial matters at home make you? Fly into a rage? Or? Are you depressed? Go to work at work; People who are terminally ill may wish to go to the hospital to visit critically ill patients; Facing the deep trouble of a hopeless relationship, it is an effective psychological self-help and an objective avoidance method to escape with great wisdom and courage.
In addition, we can also adopt the subjective avoidance method, that is, we can strengthen the potential mechanism of human instinct through subjectivity and try to forget or suppress our unpleasant experiences. Subjectively, to realize the transfer of excitement center, attention transfer is the simplest and feasible subjective avoidance method. When you are miserable, concentrate on doing something meaningful and naturally avoid psychological difficulties.
2. Transformation method
Not any objective reality can escape. Sometimes, the same reality or situation, if viewed from one angle, may cause negative emotional experience and fall into psychological dilemma; From another perspective, we can find positive meaning and turn negative emotions into positive ones.
According to legend, an old lady had two sons: the first one sold umbrellas and the second one dried salt. The old lady worries about her two sons almost every day. What are you worried about? The old lady said that every sunny day, umbrellas are not easy to sell on such sunny days. So I'm worried about my eldest son. Every cloudy day, the old lady whispered, It's raining on this cloudy day. How can the salt be dried? So he is worried about his second son. The old lady's worries came and went, and she was haggard and finally fell ill.
The two sons don't know what to do. Fortunately, a wise man suggested that you should be happy for your second son. It's easy to sell umbrellas on cloudy days. You should be happy for your eldest son. If you change your mind like this, you won't worry! ? In this way, the old lady really turned grief into joy, broad-minded and healthy. It seems that when examining, thinking and evaluating an objective reality, learning to change the perspective and look at the problem from another angle will often make people feel the painful psychological dilemma disappear.
3, masturbation method
Aesop's fable says that the fox can't eat grapes, so he says the grapes are sour. You can only get lemons, just say that lemons are sweet and don't feel bad. Psychology is borrowed, and some kind? Rationalization? Explain the reasons of the facts, turn the malignant stimulus into benign stimulus, and comfort yourself psychologically. What is it called? Sour grapes and sweet lemons? Psychology.
Yes, the so-called reason for masturbation is just? Justify yourself? , but it does have the function of maintaining psychological balance and realizing psychological self-help. In the unit, you can't get a job title, and it's not worth it. This time, you can't get the title. Besides, you can do it without a professional title. If you have a real performance, you won't be fall in price. Why fight for a false name?
Lovers break up, or marry such a heartless person, maybe it will be bad luck to marry her early? Bye. Isn't it just to avoid future trouble? If you lose 200 yuan, it will be a year-end award, not to mention? Go to wealth to avoid disaster? Isn't it a great blessing that the whole family is safe?
This is not? Spiritual victory method? Really? That's right. The law of spiritual victory should not be underestimated. There are some unpleasant things outside. If you can change, of course, you should work hard for the good. If it is a foregone conclusion, we should comfort ourselves, accept ourselves and admit the reality, which is many times more painful than depression.
4. Humorous methods
Humor is one of the most helpful self-help strategies to get rid of psychological difficulties. It is said that the great philosopher Socrates had a very violent wife. One day, Socrates was talking to a guest when his wife suddenly came in and made a scene, throwing water from the washbasin on Socrates. How embarrassing is the situation? This is unbearable for a man with a little blood, but Socrates said with a smile, I knew there would be heavy rain after thunder. ? His wife couldn't help laughing at an embarrassing remark.
In the middle of British Prime Minister Wilson's speech, someone in the audience shouted: Shit! Garbage! ? This is obviously the content of his speech. But as a capable politician, Wilson smiled and pretended to be confused: Shit? Garbage! Public health? Gentlemen, I'm about to talk about this social problem. ? In this way, instead of getting into trouble, he won applause.
Laughter is a spiritual disinfectant, and humor is a ladder to get out of psychological difficulties. When career and life are frustrated and communication is deadlocked, humorous behavior and humorous language can often turn difficulties and embarrassment into ease and nature, thus relaxing mental tension, easing atmosphere, releasing emotions, relieving anxiety and getting rid of difficulties.
Step 5 keep a low profile
People will instinctively improve their life expectations. This naturally has its positive significance, and it is the psychological motive force of personal enterprising and social progress. But? Extremes must be reversed? Treating life with unrealistic expectations may be the psychological source that some people spend precious time in depressed psychological difficulties every day and can't enjoy the happiness and happiness of life all their lives. The higher the expectation, the greater the psychological and emotional conflict, which is a conclusion of social psychology.
Yu? Officer. Read, at? Money? Way, in? Things? Desire, lower expectations; So should a career. Although,? Aim high? It has been praised by people, but what is the society like without people? Although,? Soldiers who don't want to be generals are not good soldiers? People have always appreciated it, but no small team can form an army. Where's the general
There is only one sun in the sky and only one Everest on the ground. Although the stars are not as dazzling as the sun, they are equally radiant; Although the mountain is not as high as Mount Everest, it is still full of vigor and excitement. ? Without the fragrance of flowers and the height of trees, I am a grass that no one knows. With the realm of grass, I bid farewell to my psychological predicament.
6, catharsis method
Due to the influence of social culture, people seem to give more affirmation to restraining self-emotion. And give more negation to venting self-emotion. In fact, it is against psychological science. Psychology believes that when a person is frustrated, he uses the power of will to suppress his emotions, which is manifested as laughing and laughing under normal circumstances.
Although this kind of practice can relieve anxiety, it can only relieve the superficial tension, but it can't hold back the inner emotional turmoil. Not only can it not solve the problem, but it will also fall into a deeper psychological dilemma and bring greater physical and mental harm. Anger, like imposed restraint, is like a time bomb, which is always in danger of destroying itself or others; If grief is suppressed and not vented with tears, it will not only endanger physical and mental health, but even die.
Just like a sultry summer, only a heavy rain can clear the air, just like a clear Wan Li, the psychological pressure in trouble can only be released to win a clear psychological sky.
According to social effects, catharsis can be divided into reasonable and unreasonable. People who are good at psychological self-help always choose reasonable ways to vent their pain: first, rational venting. For example, tell your close relatives and friends the grievances and pains in your heart, or talk to yourself and resort to words to let the bitter water in your heart leak out.
The second is the catharsis of sensibility and rationality. It is said that there is a sandbox filled with fine sand in the office of an American president, which is used to vent his anger when necessary. This is really a wise move. We might as well cry and shout like this, and let our anger erupt on appropriate occasions. This is also done by the wise and the strong. Because this is the best immediate self-help strategy under extreme psychological difficulties.
7. Compensation method
? No one is perfect? A person inevitably has some defects in life or psychology, thus affecting the realization of a certain goal. People will take various measures to make up for this defect, so as to alleviate and eliminate psychological troubles. This is called compensation in psychology.
One kind of compensation is to replace the failed goal with another goal. Seiji Ozawa, a famous Japanese conductor, once specialized in piano. When he hurt his hand and affected the sensitivity of his fingers, he was very upset for a while. Later, he did not hesitate to switch to conducting and became famous in one fell swoop, thus getting rid of his psychological predicament.
Another compensation is to rely on new efforts, in order to remedy a weakness, make it from weak to strong, and achieve the original goal. The Greek politician Desai Seigas was unable to speak because of weak pronunciation and mild stuttering. He made up his mind to practice eloquence, put pebbles in his mouth to practice speaking and shouted at the sea. In the end, his language disadvantage was made up and he became a famous speaker, and his inner tension and anxiety were naturally eliminated.
Faced with some weaknesses or shortcomings, if you just sigh, you will only taste bitterness. The positive countermeasure is to find another way to really get out of the psychological dilemma. ? Lost in the east corner, harvested mulberries? Is the best interpretation of this road to self-help.
8, sublimation method
Goethe, the writer, was lovelorn when he was young and tried to commit suicide several times. But he finally took the broken feelings as the material, got inspiration from the burning ashes of love, and wrote a masterpiece that shocked the world? Young Werther. Really? A blessing in disguise is a blessing in disguise. .
Difficulties and setbacks are not what people pray for, because they bring people psychological depression and anxiety. People who are good at psychological self-help can sublimate this emotion into a kind of strength and guide it to develop in a direction that is beneficial to themselves, people and society. When they are satisfied with their success, they also get rid of their psychological depression and anxiety and achieve a positive psychological balance.
Ancient King Wen, Zhong Ni, Qu Yuan, Zuo Qiu, Sun Zi, Bu Wei, Han Fei, Sima Qian, etc. Because they saved themselves through sublimation in the disastrous psychological dilemma and shaped the image of the strong. When people encounter setbacks, it is useless to hold their breath or despair blindly, and anti-social revenge is even worse. This is all punishing yourself for other people's mistakes. The correct attitude is: turn setbacks and failures into motivation, rise from psychological predicament and be a strong man in life.
? When asking for relief, don't ask others for help? . These are the last words of Sakyamuni before he died. We don't have to be Buddhists, and we don't have to refuse help from others. But when we are troubled by psychological difficulties, we must first learn to save ourselves.
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