Thoughts on the Third Road NLP Sixth Anniversary Forum (3,000 words in length, prone to numbness in squatting)

On July 7-9, a two-day and two-night anniversary celebration was held in the Auditorium of Tai 'an Thousand People's Association. The five tutors made a wonderful sharing and felt a lot. It took me a week to sum up and review, which just gave me more experience.

DAY 1 Taste Smart Life-Xie Feng

1, be gentle and slow. —— Dean Xie Feng

Just as Easy Efficiency advocates "high efficiency, slow life". Life is life, not getting on the bus quickly. Spring is coming, enjoy it, summer is coming, enjoy it. Eat well when you should eat, and sleep peacefully when you should sleep; Being with family is a brand-new companionship, and enjoying solitude is a safe enjoyment.

I remember listening to a lecture given by Bi Shumin. She asked: Do you know the names of trees and flowers around 1 km? Oh, don't say names. In many busy years, I looked up and found that it was winter and spring. I didn't even notice what buds he picked and when she opened them. There is no life in the busy life, not even myself.

Slow down, it doesn't matter if you are young and can't become famous. Why bother?

20 17 is really a slow year for me. Slow down, in addition to discovering the scenery of the 24 solar terms, it is so beautiful and rich; Found parents who are getting younger and younger, and they need to be concerned so much; There are lovely children (not mine). Every time I see them, they are different ... there are family members to clean up, people who know themselves and friends who are too busy to forget. ...

Shh ... listen to cicadas in the middle of the night. Listen to the frogs.

Try it: eat every bite slowly, chew every bite until 24 times, and eat without talking ~

2. "Shut up".

It's not the mouth, it's the brain that stops thinking and makes it quiet. True silence is to stop talking to yourself. When our inner voice can't shut up, we can't hear each other's real voice. Through study and practice, I experienced the state of suspension. Leave some space gently. Delayed reaction. —— Dean Xie Feng

It is especially difficult for me to "shut up". Whether driving or sleeping, my mind is as colorful as a movie, and I often question whether the light just passed is red or green. In this state, I really can't hear the real voice of the other party, because you don't say that my brain has told me for you, and it is enough for me to blame you directly when I am angry. You don't need to explain, you are a, b, c, oh, oh, so I once had a group of colleagues labeled as "irresponsible" by my brain, lazy, procrastinating, dealing with the Japanese, deliberately confronting and so on. That's what I finally thought. What I sent out will definitely come back, and as a result, I am "lonely".

Fortunately, a wave of colleagues reminded me that I was aware of my own problems and went to find the root cause of changing myself. Rather than serious problems such as breaking up, divorce, and child rebellion.

When running, cleaning the house and cooking ... sometimes I think about it, my mind is blank. I like these things that I almost didn't do before, and they bring me a lot of benefits and fun.

The wisdom of life lies in changing your mind. —— Dean Xie Feng

Select and accept the account.

Life is a game of choice, no matter what you choose, it means giving up. Therefore, the key is not how to choose, but whether you are willing to accept this debt in the future.

It's like going to eat when you're hungry. Whatever you order, remember to pay the bill.

The pain lies in choosing a and considering B.

Ideas, persistence, results.

There is no right or wrong thought. If persistence becomes obsession, there will be obstacles. Obsessed with results? Hehe, everyone's life has only one result. Are you in a hurry to rank? Eg. Being obsessed with children's achievements and how much money you earn are fruits, but they are not the final fruits. Hitting the center is our goal. Don't cry if you miss once. Every fruit is the reason for the next fruit, and the process of continuous accumulation is growth.

Bodhisattva is afraid of cause, but ordinary people are afraid of fruit.

4. career.

This matter can benefit all beings and exceed the length of your life. —— Dean Xie Feng

These tutors and the dean of the branch who met in nlp are really doing something based on love, and they are convinced that this matter has far-reaching and long-term significance. I really have too many things to do, and I often calculate the interests of small organizations and individuals. Take your time, it is not so easy for a yogi, let alone a yogi.

5. Respect your parents.

1) Respect your ancestors by respecting your parents. Recognize one's ancestors and return to the Sect.

China's family culture is very rich. Up to now, I have no feelings for my family in faith, but my father's surname is Cui and mine is Cui. Cui just writes in a different way, and the family is just a wedding, no different from the neighbors.

Maybe this is the indifference of family style. However, when analyzing the family relationship, I found that from the disharmony between grandparents to the family of four of my father's generation, the relationship between husband and wife and parent-child relationship are bumpy and even on the verge of breaking down. What is even more frightening, however, is that if we continue to "play freely" without learning to detect changes, nine children in our generation will not be able to escape the spell.

I am glad that I met nlp, which can keep my small family from derailing and repeating the fate of my parents. If after many years, I can do well, set a positive example for my family, and strive to bring my big family back to the track of harmony and happiness, so that my children and grandchildren can live in harmony.

2) Accepting our parents is actually accepting our past. It's time to let your parents go.

Many people think it's a joke. There are those who don't accept their parents and those who don't let them go, hehe, everywhere. How many times have we used what we have learned to educate our parents and criticize old habits that he shouldn't have in his life, and we always can't control our emotions. When we heard someone criticize you, "You are just like your father …", we were very angry. That's what I am anyway. I once gnashed my teeth angrily and asked myself: Why do you want to give me such a bad-tempered and mischievous father, so that I have such an unhappy childhood and an unstable family ... I used to prefer him to die silly, as long as it was not like this.

In this way, I became dependent on him, worshiped, feared and moved, resisted, accused, educated and neglected, with tangled contempt, hatred and despair ... 27 years later, I climbed my father's mountain and saw that he was really so tall and majestic.

I see that my strengths come from him, and I hate his shortcomings most. I don't want to admit it, but really, his influence on me flows in my blood and every cell, in every minute of my past and in every moment of my future. My denial of him is also a denial of myself. I don't admit it or accept it.

I always feel that I am an injured innocent child in my childhood family, oh! Look, so is he, especially when he is out of control. He is completely a child who protects himself with scars. So he repeated his father and mother, and I repeated him. Understand him, I understand myself, accept him, and I accept myself.

Respecting parents does not mean that we agree that he likes his methods.

The teacher told his own example: my father-in-law and old colleagues are angry, and it takes a tough battle to get this truth back. No one in my family can stop me, the old man said angrily. You all don't come with me, but speak for others! The teacher said to her father-in-law, "Dad, you are right. We must fight for this tone! " ! But you know what we want? We hope that dad will stay with us healthily. "The old man instantly understood and said," Hum! You don't understand me, so you understand me. "

The highest respect between husband and wife is:

Respect each other's families, do things for each other's families and achieve each other.

My husband (current fiance) is a model of this great wisdom and great mind. I am very grateful to my in-laws for creating such a harmonious and happy family, so my husband is kind, loyal and considerate. There is really nothing more valuable than giving his children a harmonious family.

He learned that his father's lifelong regret is that as an only child (not counting his aunt), he has no son and grandson, and he is bent on sacrificing his daughter's happiness and is deeply helpless. An old gentleman, who has a house and a deposit, is not bad at all, and risks being easily mistaken for inserting the door backwards. He is willing to let one of our children be surnamed Cui in the future, and try to allocate boys ... (Special thanks to my husband's brother, who gave birth to a son and a daughter to satisfy my father-in-law's heart, to the benefactor's nephew Niu Niu, and to his parents-in-law's broad mind and understanding)

More than that, considering various family factors, my husband agreed to sell the house in the south and live in Hedong. Although my parents prepared it for us, my parents have lived in the village community for five years, and it is always easy to be mistaken for inserting the door backwards. He has to adapt to the living habits of my family. But my great husband never refused, even though he could have said no.

My mother often praises him behind his back. Once, she heard my husband say "Mom, I'm at work" after work. She secretly shed tears. Yes, why not shed tears? Having two daughters 27 years ago made her cry. Today, his children will always be with him!

For me, my husband is extremely willing. I casually revealed my favorite items, so he saved money to buy them for me as a gift. I like not only eating, drinking and having fun, but also expensive things-attending classes, and my 30 thousand husband agreed to let me go without blinking, so I felt like going to school.

My husband has done too many things for me, too numerous to mention. My parents are very grateful for everything they have done for my family. He not only made me, but also made my parents and my family. Don't thank you for your kindness Love your husband.

7. Children are the mirror of the family. —— Xiaoletu Youth Mentor

CCTV produced a documentary-Mirror. Some "problem children" are sent to a special institution for education, so that they can return to a normal obedient state ... as Dr. Zhang Xiang said: every child is a good child. The child was born with a blank sheet of paper. Who is responsible for becoming such a rebellious and unfilial child after more than ten years? Parents, as their children's first teachers, are also the teachers who have the greatest influence on their children's lives. How can they be qualified to blame children, teachers, society and fate? The child is a copy of his parents, and the original is problematic. What's the use of revising the copy? Only fatigue and despair.

Teaching by example is greater than words and deeds, and there is no need for teaching by example. The relationship and interaction mode between parents is the future husband-wife relationship, social relationship and self-relationship of children.

8. Five-star brain environment. Wipe frequently, and don't create dust. We should have a sense of introspection, clear up negative emotions, thoughts and even thoughts in time, and shield thinking traps.

9. others' achievements and self-worth.