How to prepare for being a new mom

"Marriage" and "childbirth" are of great significance to traditional Chinese people, but these two stages are also important journeys for their own orientation and role change. After adapting to being a wife, are you ready to be a mom? Premarital communication is very important to adjust the relationship between husband and wife positioning, without warning, the mother is pregnant, and have to re-adjust themselves to accept a new role, a momentary adjustment is not good under the circumstances, a lot of problems have arisen. "Premarital communication is very important," said Lin Xiuhui, executive director of the Love Family Cultural Foundation, reminding new parents of the importance of communicating with each other beforehand about when they are ready to have a child join the family and about parenting issues. In addition, the most important thing is whether or not you are looking forward to the birth of your child, and whether or not you can accept your father or mother, and whether or not you can quickly adapt to parenthood are quite relevant. Adjust the mood to meet the new life after the birth of a new mother, not only the body has not yet returned to normal, but also have to be distracted to take care of only wailing baby, often leading to emotional instability, and even produce "postpartum anxiety disorder. Lee Hsin-chien, a psychiatrist at the Taipei Medical University Hospital, specifically clarified that the real diagnosis of "postpartum anxiety disorder" is actually not many clinical examples of mothers, many mothers have only minor emotional problems, as long as they rely on some of the methods of stress relief, it is possible to let new mothers as soon as possible, the joy of adapting to their new roles, and to get through this awkward emotional transition period. This is an awkward emotional transition period. Mr. Lin added that after giving birth, mothers have to face all kinds of new shocks, such as the sense of loss that the baby is no longer closely connected to them, loss of attention, etc., which can easily give rise to the problem of poor emotional adjustment. "The buffer period of postpartum to do the month, it is the new mother to adjust the mood, the body's important stage." Postpartum emotional performance a, "anxiety": some new mothers, due to their own physical, personality, environmental and other factors, will produce anxiety, when the degree of pressure they can withstand than the average person can withstand, that is, the so-called pathological anxiety. Second, "melancholy": the causes of melancholy may come from three aspects; (1) physiological melancholy: after giving birth, the mother's body hormones and other physiological state will have drastic changes, physiological in order to adjust to these changes, and may appear melancholy situation. (2) Changes in the surrounding environment: The family's attention is shifted from the original pregnant woman to the newborn, and when one feels that one's own needs have been neglected, it is easy to produce mood swings. (3) Psychological depression: perhaps the mother is very happy when the process of pregnancy, the child once landed, turn to face some of the minutiae of life, changing diapers, soak milk, coaxing the baby not to cry, etc., if the mother has not yet adjusted to the good, it is very likely to produce emotional distress. Emotional changes, if they are minor, as long as the pressure to get rid of, for the postpartum adaptation to life will not have too much impact. However, there are a small number of mothers, from the original expectation of a new life, to the subsequent suspicion of not being able to do a good job as a mother, always feel that they are not doing as well as others, and lose interest in the things around them, so that the emotional problems affect the physiology, and even insomnia, loss of appetite, etc., so that the body has a major warning signals, which is known as the so-called serious "postpartum anxiety disorder "This is also known as severe postpartum anxiety disorder. "This phenomenon should not be taken lightly," Dr. Lee solemnly appealed, although it is not common in the clinic, the most fearful of severe depression patients appear "baby abuse", or even "infanticide" of the Extreme cases. "Mothers smothering baby boys, beating baby girls, and so on, are not unfamiliar to us in the news, and many of them are due to new mothers suffering from postpartum depression, and it is difficult for them to adjust their moods, so they vent their negative emotions on the innocent little lives. The most important thing is to take care of your body," said Dr. Lee. Postpartum due to the pain of wounds and loss of physical strength, so mothers should try to let their bodies get proper rest during the menstrual period. "Not only do you have to take care of your child, but learning how to take care of yourself is also an important topic," says Executive Director Lin Hsiu-huei, who especially reminds new mothers to learn how to take care of themselves before they can have a good physical and mental state, and in turn, have the energy left over to take care of their children. Experienced helpers: Most mothers have their babies taken care of by their family members during their menstruation period. Not only do they have the opportunity to fully recuperate physically, but also, through the leadership and teaching of experienced mothers-in-law or mothers-in-law, they are able to get better benefits from their mood adjustment and rest. Dr. Lee reminds that during the menstrual period, it is best to be accompanied by experienced family members and elders, otherwise it is likely that the mother's habits do not understand, or because of the lack of experience in bringing up a child, but their own anxiety affects the mood of the mother. Third, the pipeline to relieve depression: in order to prevent new mothers from improperly transferring negative emotions to the baby, a good pipeline is quite necessary. "The object of the outpouring is important," suggests Executive Director Lin, and this object should not be limited to one's own family, as long as the other party can accept your outpouring and listen to your needs, such as coworkers, friends, and so on. Fourth, practical support: the use of resources for supporters is also a key point, "Give couples a space to moderately adjust the relationship between husband and wife," Executive Director Lin suggests that, although there is an additional child, ask your mother-in-law or a good nanny to help bring up the child, so that mothers get proper rest after childbirth, and mothers and fathers to go to the movies and shopping together. This is a good way to bring couples closer together and to spice up their relationship at the right time. Fifth, do a good job of their own time management: Lin executive pointed out that postpartum mothers suddenly more than a lot of roles, especially now, women, at the same time play the role of the workplace on the charge of the strong woman, once the emotions of poor expression, will produce a worrying situation. Moderately share out some of the responsibilities or is to ask for assistance from others, in order to allow themselves to get a break, the opportunity to adjust their footing. Sixth, no longer hold high standards: postpartum mothers are not physically and mentally fit to do too much labor, do not be afraid of other people can not do well, treat yourself as a superwoman to see all the things on their own, "lower standards, or the use of alternative ways," Lin executive suggested. Lower your standards or utilize alternatives," advises Mr. Lin. "Show appropriate weakness" and "ask for help" to get your husband involved in more practical matters, so that he can enjoy his right to be a father. In addition, Executive Director Lin would like to remind wives of mothers that when husbands look at their wives, who are suffering from all kinds of discomforts due to pregnancy, but find that they can't do much to help, the husbands will feel a deep sense of powerlessness and frustration, and then the mothers should look at the situation with empathy and encouragement instead of unreasonableness, so that the husband can learn to take care of the child, and communicate with and coordinate the way of taking care of the child in order to make each other more harmonious. This is the only way to make each other more harmonious. Support from others *Husband: Support from others is an important way for a woman to get through her postpartum worries, especially her husband, who is the closest to her, is even more important. "Don't let the baby be your wife's only one," says Dr. Lee. Little baby by two people **** with the creation of the child, not the child all things are handed over to his wife is responsible for, together to participate in the joint record of the child's growth and change, timely comfort and support to the mother, do not let the child was born, but in turn, become a test period of the feelings of husband and wife. ※ Elders: Elders treat new mothers "the most taboo not to take the daughter as a mother," Dr. Lee specifically suggested that, whether it is a mother-in-law or mother, in their eyes, the mother in labor is still their own children, has been giving advice. This will make the mother's heart frustration, but also detrimental to the new mother to adjust the mood of motherhood. Recognize that you are only an "assisting" role, support the new mother's views and ideas, as soon as possible, so that she can be clearer about the concept of child-rearing. Friends: Visiting at the right time is important. When the mother's body or the baby is not feeling well, friends should try not to disturb their rest. Appropriate verbal support: Don't give new moms unsuggestive words or advice that you think will be helpful, as these may cause emotional frustration or anxiety. Let new mothers know how to get help or assistance when they need it, without over-involvement, but I'm always there when you need me. This is the right attitude that friends and family around new mothers should have, Dr. Lee said. Related articles recommended postpartum new mother must study (Figure) do a high EQ new mother new mother how to wash the baby's hair? As I am a mother of twins, they are now 3 years and 5 months more> Ask the Experts