Knowing their hearts can save them from their mistakes

Knowing its heart and then can save its loss

Yichuan County Secondary Vocational School Ji Yunjiao

Concerns about home education began in 2020 during the epidemic prevention and control of the closed city, the child does not properly online class, do not write their homework properly, online class and classmates talk nonsense and so on, a variety of problems. I was very distressed, how to solve it? I searched for a lot of lessons to listen, to learn, to take notes. Until the end of the epidemic, I joined the Yichuan County Guoxue Culture Promotion Association, and followed the teachers to learn a series of public service courses on family education, such as the way to teach children, which eased my anxiety a little. I realized that there are many Chinese concepts, ideas and methods of educating children in the excellent traditional Chinese culture. I have made further efforts to become a lecturer after my own study, and have been to the community women's federation to teach classes on family education. 2021 winter vacation, I self-funded study and obtained the certificate of family education instructor, and then followed the study of family education practical class, that is, to solve the problem of family education in a number of cases.

With the previous foundation, when I saw the school group to let parents and teachers learn family education class "to the adolescent mental health lectures", I was very interested in, carefully and conscientiously listened to and made several pages of notes, shared to the circle of friends, want to call more parents and friends to effectively use these very good educational resources, through learning to make their own parent-child relationship harmony, family harmony.

Ms. Chen Mo's lecturing style is what I like, she has fewer words on the courseware, but it's very precise, and the key point is that she talks about a lot of cases. When I hear the cases, it is as if they are talking about me, very much a sense of immersion. For example, children nowadays have a high level of moral judgment and follow rules. My kindergarten kiddo has repeatedly told me to remove the windshield from my electric car, as it is not good for safety. We all read it in the safety education class, and the teacher said that you can't put a windshield on an electric car. Although Xiaobao reminded me many times, I just did it perfunctorily every time, and eventually I didn't remove the windshield. As a result, on one of my children's way to school, the windshield constrained me from controlling the car, and I fell down, injuring both the children and the adults. If I had followed the rules and removed the windshield, I could have avoided this injury. Children are more disciplined than adults.

Another example is the unprecedented academic pressure, contemporary children face anxious teachers and teachers, forming a high sense of competition. Mr. Chen Mo said that human life is divided into three levels: 1 material (food, clothing, housing and transportation), 1 spiritual (art, beauty) 3 soul (cosmology). Suddenly I remembered, my big baby is not like this? When he was in second grade, he cried when he couldn't write well and rewrote, fighting with himself. At first I thought it was a good thing for children to be demanding of themselves. I didn't realize that my slow and methodical Dabao was lacking in nerve elasticity, the result of being pushed by me. If I hadn't studied this lesson, I would never have known my faults, and how could I have spoken to my child's heart? How can I speak to my child's heart? Knowing his heart can save him from his faults! We are learning from Mr. Chen Mo is the process of knowing the child's heart.

There is also a high level of discourse, no sense of authority, the child has a lot of information, thinking power on. Parental status alone suppression, has pale in comparison. Teachers to Dabao issued awards "erudition" star, I do not think, the little kid where there is erudition? Yesterday morning community morning reading, public service reading teacher storytelling, talking about the process of mosquitoes sucking blood, Dabao blurted out that only female mosquitoes suck blood, male mosquitoes do not suck blood. I was shocked that I didn't even know that my child knew that! I was curious and casually asked the male mosquitoes do not suck blood that eat what? Seven or eight children and two teachers are silent, Dabao said the book said male mosquitoes suck tree sap life. Look, children have more information than parents. I also increasingly feel that children ask a lot of questions, I can not answer. This is the era forced parents to learn and grow ah! Otherwise, the child asked this parent does not know, asked that parent does not know, how to form a sense of authority?

Another example is the weak sense of reality, seeking a sense of existence. Due to the increasing miniaturization of the family, resulting in a lack of playmates, children are often alone in playing with toys, this is a low-level game, a more advanced game is a group game. There is trauma healing within group play, which is exactly what children lack. We're okay in our county, kids can still play in groups, albeit not much. The problem with a weak sense of reality is that kids today are not afraid of death, they are afraid of suffering! This is a key topic to pick up at random and well worth studying. As a teacher, I have discussed with my colleagues that today's children are "not afraid of death, but afraid of suffering", and I feel helpless and deplorable about this. But it is "not afraid of death, afraid of suffering" cause do not know, do not know the reason, if you can not treat the symptoms, can not solve the problem from the root. After studying Mr. Chen Mo's class, I realized that the reason for "fear of death, fear of suffering" is a weak sense of reality. If I know the reason, I can solve the problem. I'm going to study this topic in the future.

To summarize the main content of this lecture:

Characteristics of today's urban students:

First, a deep sense of loneliness, inexplicable sadness, leading to depression.

Second, the heavy emotional burden, can not return love, deep self-blame.

Third, the unprecedented academic pressure, the face of anxious teachers and teachers, the formation of a high sense of competition.

Fourth, high discourse, no sense of authority, a large amount of information, thinking power.

Fifth, weak sense of reality, seeking a sense of existence, high self-esteem.

Six, high level of moral judgment, rationalized cognition, strong sense of justice.

vii. Narrowing of socio-sexual gender differences and changing attitudes towards marriage.

VIII, high personalization requirements, private space, sense of boundaries, self-worth realization.

Nine, the third cage rat, helpless, entangled.

In short, parents in the parent-child relationship, family relations in the confusion, confusion and not from the teacher, it is confusing, the end is not solved. There is a need to learn from the confusion. The first thing you need to do is to understand the child's heart, and what you say, the child will love to listen to. If you know your child's heart, you will be able to save him or her from his or her mistakes. How do you know your child's heart? Come to learn the parent classroom home education!

Thank you to Mr. Chen Mo for his wonderful teaching, to the host Luoyang City Bureau of Education for its educational sentiments, and to the Yichuan County Education Bureau for its competent organization and the vigorous promotion of each school. Home and school **** education, family harmony, social harmony, talent!

July 6, 2022