marriage customs

Three Books and Six Rites are the basis of traditional weddings in China, which were determined as early as the pre-Qin period. The so-called "Six Rites" are the six procedures that you must complete to get a wife. Every marriage must complete these six steps before it can be officially recognized. The six etiquette are accepting gifts, asking names, Najib, accepting gifts, inviting guests and welcoming relatives. The "Three Books" are the documents that should be possessed when practicing the Six Rites, including the letter of appointment, the letter of engagement and the letter of welcome, and are the written records to ensure the validity of marriage in ancient times. Modern people emphasize simplicity and convenience. The traditional etiquette of three books and six rites has been simplified, and some of them are mixed with western wedding customs. Three letters of appointment A letter from a man to a woman when she is engaged, which is used to confirm the engagement. A letter from a man paying tribute to his wife when giving gifts, detailing the items and quantity when giving gifts. On the day of the welcome book and the wedding, the man gave the woman a list of books. These three books are notes for men and women to greet each other in the whole wedding procedure. The contents are auspicious, praise and congratulations. In ancient times, when the man met the right person to get married, he would ask the matchmaker to send the bride price to the woman's home and ask for marriage, which is what we call marriage proposal. After parents ask the bride's name to accept the proposal, they will give the date of birth (that is, the eight characters of the year) to the matchmaker, and the matchmaker will write the eight characters, name, place of origin and three generations of information of the prospective bride on red paper (called "Yu Tie") and give it to the man's home to show good or bad luck, that is, the eight characters now mentioned. Naji, also known as Wen Ding, asked the fortune teller to calculate whether the horoscopes of both men and women matched to decide whether the marriage was auspicious or not. This procedure is called marriage. If there is no contradiction between men and women, we can discuss the terms of engagement. So in ancient times, fortune tellers had the greatest authority over marriage, and the success or failure of marriage depended on his words. Also called gift, parents of both men and women negotiate all conditions. According to the agreed conditions, both men and women send the betrothal gift (commonly known as bride price or tea gift) to the woman's home, and the two sides exchange engagement letters and posts. Only in this way can this contact be considered positive or recognized. Invite men to ask fortune tellers to choose a good day, and also have their own search for "children" to find a good day for marriage. When the auspicious day is chosen, it is to inform the daughter's family to prepare an invitation for her daughter's wedding. On the wedding day, the groom took the marriage certificate to the woman's house to marry the bride. Giving gifts, also called receiving gifts, is a relatively complete and valued traditional etiquette preserved in the Three Books and Six Gifts. It is usually held one month to two weeks before the wedding. On that day, the man's family will invite two or four female relatives (who must be well-off, that is, husbands, children and parents-in-law) to act as matchmakers and bring bride price, gift money and a lot of gifts to the woman's family. In order to get the meaning of pairs, most gifts are even, packed in five Chinese gift boxes, plus a mailbox, forming six gift boxes. In addition to giving the bride price, the man will choose two or three auspicious days first, and let his wife set the wedding date on the day of the bride price. After the bride price of the man is delivered, the female guests of the man's house will open the gift box, select some gold ornaments for the bride to wear and say auspicious words. After that, everyone congratulated each other and congratulated each other, and the gift-giving ceremony was completed. Gift-giving precautions: Gift-giving has evolved into a written rule today. That is, the man's family prepares gifts and various gifts for the woman's family as an engagement ceremony. Usually, the number of gift cakes, gifts, gifts, etc. As a gift, it is even, which means in pairs. Coconut has its meaning in the ceremony. If parents are alive, use two pairs, otherwise use one pair. Eight kinds of Beijing fruits, lotus seeds, lilies, dried longan, dried litchi, red beans, mung beans, peanuts and peaches. Tea, because tea trees cannot be transplanted, must be planted with seeds, so tea is given as a gift. The woman received a big gift and needed a gift in return. Usually give the above items, a pair of lotus roots, a pair of heads and a pair of pomegranates, and give greeting towels according to the number of boyfriends and relatives. I gave my son-in-law two pairs of suits (materials), a belt, socks, a wallet (containing money) and Li Li, which read: "Five generations under one roof, a hundred children and a thousand grandchildren". After receiving the dowry, the woman's family should send it to the man's family the day before the wedding at the latest. In the past, Cantonese people liked to send dowry with camphor wood to show their durability. Dowry can be divided into "sending makeup" and "welcoming makeup". "Make-up" means that the woman's family sends the dowry to the man's family. In addition to people with makeup, the woman's family will also invite several relatives and friends to take care of it together. The bigger the number, the thicker the woman's house. The dowry is carried to the man's house, and the man will invite relatives and friends to meet. This is called "welcome makeup". The man's family has read the dowry records (the catalogue of the number and types of dowry items) and can't remove makeup until he knows the total number of dowry tables. At this time, the man's family must give red envelopes (benefits) to makeup artists, servants and makeup remover to get the meaning of good luck and prosperity. It symbolizes that a couple has officially entered the adult stage, and they want to form a new family and shoulder the mission of spreading branches and leaves. Jackets are divided into groom's jackets and bride's jackets. The wedding was held the night before the wedding week. First choose the auspicious time, and then both men and women will hold a ceremony at home. Usually, the man will go to work about half an hour earlier than the woman. When reaching the summit, both men and women need to take a bath first. People who are "blessed" (commonly known as "blessed men/blessed women", are the elders of both men and women's families, and need parents and children to be alive and husband and wife to be harmonious) bathe themselves with pomelo (pomelo leaves are said to be able to cleanse dirt). And put on a brand-new one.