I want my second child to have my own name, not to refer to the in-laws, is it feasible?

There is nothing wrong with that. In the old days, you could take your husband's surname with you! With your own surname, you are an only child can also be, if not the only child best not to engage in this specialization.

If you want to have a second child with your own name, without reference to the views of the in-laws is not feasible, I think the first thing to look at your status in the family, that is, your in-laws a family of your degree of importance; in addition, can you with your name, is by your in-laws of the degree of openness to decide.

Although it's your child if you take your father's name or your mother's name, it may not be the same for your in-laws. So, it's better to talk to them first and get their opinion. If they don't agree, you can also come to an agreement with your husband. If you can't reach an agreement, then don't have a baby!

My family's second child is with my last name, at first it seems to be mentioned with the in-laws, they did not take a position and did not oppose, with the other half of the agreement, the child will be with my last name. My attitude is very clear, the second child does not take my last name, you can choose not to have. Having one child with the father's last name and another with the mother's last name is better than not having one at all. So, they don't care.

In summary, the second child with your last name, or with the father's last name, in-laws there is to respect a little, and with the other half of the other half is also to reach an agreement. Only in this way, the second child in the end with whom the last name of the problem will be solved!

On the issue of the child's surname, the Internet has been debating, there is no standard answer. This is especially true for families where both parties are only children. So, whose surname should the child actually take?

There are so many ways to say whose last name the child should have.

One is the public order and custom. The first one is that the child has to be born with the father's name. This is our tradition, has been handed down to the present day, is still in compliance with the continuation, but also the most mainstream argument.

Second, the contribution to say. Mainly one-child families, the woman believes that marriage is also out of money and effort, especially the national two-child policy liberalized, the first child with the father's name, the second child should be with the mother and baby, which is also for the woman's contribution to the compensation. There is also a big market for this kind of talk.

Third, the freedom to say. Now that marriage is free, taking the surname should also be free. Their own children, as for the father's surname or with the mother and baby are their own freedom, others have no right to interfere, the child's grandparents and grandma and grandpa can not interfere. There are a lot of names that are not surprising.

The above three statements seem to be reasonable. I don't know what to say, but I think it's a good idea. I think, we name should respect the name of the protagonist, to consider his feelings, whether to use the heart. Although the child is small, but in every day growing up, the name is not good, affecting the child's mental health. Especially today's high divorce rate, it is easy to give people misunderstanding. For example, if the father's last name is Wang and the mother's last name is Li, usually the child's last name is also the father's last name. If the last name is Lee, others will mutter that the child is remarried family, how with the father is not a family name. The first thing you need to do is to get a good deal on your own, and then you'll be able to get a good deal on your own, and then you'll be able to get a good deal on your own.

So, it is recommended to take the father's name. Besides, if you don't tell the elderly directly with the mother's surname, the elders will not be happy. The rice is good for the man and woman who are in love, but for the elders, it may be a disease-causing dry rice, which is not a mature and stable young parents should do.

Based on the current trend of public opinion in society and the family culture dominated by Confucianism, we suggest that you do a good job of thinking about your husband and his family, and really don't want to communicate with your in-laws, so you can communicate through your husband. There are several reasons for this:

First, your husband is the one you want to join hands with for the rest of your life, and he has half of the children, so even if you don't refer to your in-laws' opinions, you should communicate with your husband. And when communicating with your other half, you should carefully observe his reaction, maybe he thinks it's not a big deal, but cares a lot about his parents' right to know and their opinions, so it's very necessary to consult your in-laws. There is no need to make your husband uncomfortable by offending your in-laws, which will in turn affect the relationship between the couple.

Secondly, if you don't want your in-laws to have an opinion because you are afraid of things changing. You can show what kind of role you have for the child, and why you want to do so, to reason, to move. And, you can seek the assistance of your husband to accelerate the acceptance of the in-laws on this matter.

Third, even if the couple has made a good decision, you can also walk the field, do surface work, so that the elders feel your respect for them, in-laws if reasonable, will feel that you treat them as a real family, return the same amount of respect and understanding. In addition, if outsiders and relatives ask, in-laws are not ignorant, may affect the outsider's view of you, in turn, on the marriage and family relations to complete a bad shake.

The above is my answer, if interested in me, welcome to follow @mufasa roaring .

Can it, have a child is for yourselves nor for your in-laws, your children you and your husband can decide, as long as your husband does not object, then there is no problem .

Hello, legally speaking, you can ask the child with the mother's last name, but from the custom, the general children or with the father's last name more, it is recommended that if you want to follow the mother's last name, communicate first, so as not to affect the harmony of the family

My family's oldest child was born, my husband's troops, I was in the mother's home, it has always been my parents to take care of me and the child, including the money is my father, in order to take care of me and the child, my mother orchard all the way, I have to take care of me and the child. The first time I saw this, I was in the middle of the night, and I was in the middle of the night, and I was in the middle of the night, and I was in the middle of the night. Gave 50,000 yuan to my father, my father did not take the back of my angry only to receive 30,000 yuan, back to Guangzhou, I and my children can not afford to parents, especially children, every time I heard my father and mother voice, crying, once shopping, I went to withdraw money, the card inside the suddenly more than 50,000 yuan, do not have to think, sure that my father to give, I cried on the side of the road at that time, very sad, passers-by asked me what happened, I said nothing, I miss home, in two years, I was very happy, I was very happy, I was very happy. Homesick, after two years, we opened a wholesale department in Guangzhou, at that time I was also pregnant, mother-in-law and I shopping and I said, the big baby has always been your parents to take care of, contribute money and effort, the second with your last name, I said dad will agree to it, mother-in-law said, I will talk to your father at that time, at that time, I felt hopeless, because the old family especially patriarchal, but also as a matter of fact, the back of the mother-in-law and I and the father-in-law together at breakfast, mother-in-law and I have When my father-in-law and I had breakfast together, my mother-in-law said that your father agreed, said that if it is a son, it will be with your family name, it is a daughter can be, as long as your family agrees, I said mother-in-law, no matter what gender, with my family name can be, our family to men and women like, my father never because the family is a daughter, there is such an idea, honestly, my family's conditions in the village is quite good, many people at that time, let my father to recruit a son-in-law in the rural areas are not good conditions, many people married to a man in the countryside. Rural conditions are not good, many people can not marry a wife, do the door son-in-law too much, and my father said, they find it, I do not have such an idea, the second was born a son, my in-laws are happy not, I did not mention the surname of this matter, my father-in-law to help the baby's name, said that the baby is now small, and so on a little bit bigger, we have a large family together to go back to your home trip, to be honest, the heart of the heart is quite touched, I think that this is something, you have to say to the parents-in-law. I think this, you have to talk to the in-laws, do not have to be unpleasant for a last name, anyway, no matter what the last name, is your child, when you certainly have an opinion on you.