Is there a custom in China's traditional culture to inform the family of the wife's death?

In the traditional funeral culture of China, whether the wife dies or the husband dies, the family should be informed. This folk custom is called "reporting to uncle". Here I talk about a series of procedures of "reporting uncle" and uncle attending funeral in traditional funeral culture.

The dutiful son reports to his uncle.

After the old man died in the old society, he should first report to the people in the family, select the responsible person from the family, and arrange the whole funeral with the responsible person as the main body. "Reporting to Uncle" was arranged by the person in charge.

Generally, the eldest son of a dutiful son goes to his uncle's house with one or two cousins. If there are no sons, only daughters, then the eldest daughter will go. When reporting to your uncle, you should count the number of people in his family, and then bring rice, vegetables and wine according to the number. When I arrived at my uncle's house, I was very particular about entering the door. Generally, I will go to the oldest surviving uncle's house, and the rest will be arranged by this uncle. If the uncle arranges for his son to report to every in-laws home, he will have to come to the door. Generally, my uncle doesn't make such an arrangement and goes directly to his house.

In the past, filial families thanked their uncles by wearing mourning clothes, hats, straw ropes around their waists and bare feet. There are still such customs in some places, but there are some modifications in barefoot. I used to walk barefoot all the way, but now I usually go barefoot to my uncle's house, because now young people are delicate and can't walk barefoot, which wastes time.

When the dutiful son enters an uncle's house and sets off firecrackers, he must go into the hall to bow down to the uncle's ancestral tablet, and then bow down to the uncle's house one by one according to his seniority, including those younger than himself. The folk saying is that the more people bow down, the less the sins of the dead old people, that is, they are alleviating the sins of the old people. In the past, the dutiful son had to kneel at his uncle's house even if he met a dog.

After receiving the filial son, my uncle's family must cook for him immediately, and never let him go home without eating. When the dutiful son goes back, he will send one or two rice, which is called "Mi Liang", a red envelope, a "rich bag", two pairs of chopsticks and two bowls, which are called "giving people bowls and chopsticks".

The family "looks at life"

After receiving the "report to my uncle" from the filial family, the uncle who received it informed other immediate family members to go to this uncle's house for dinner to discuss how to "see the work" and mourn. Watching students, also called watching students, is a part of funeral culture. In the old society, it was a great blow to visit the deceased, so it was euphemistically said to visit the relatives of the deceased, such as the surviving spouse of the deceased. If the spouse is gone, it is called seeing the living, which is to comfort the living relatives.

The conditions of the elderly are not as good as those of the elderly. Now the old people go to the hospital when they are sick, and the hospital can't cure them, so they leave them at home to die. In some places, cremation is carried out and taken directly from the hospital to the funeral home. Everyone knows the cause of death. In the old society, there was no such condition for the elderly to get sick. At most, doctors were invited to see them at home. At that time, the traffic was completely on foot, and even the neighbors did not know the cause of death of the old man, let alone the people in my uncle's family. Therefore, in the old society, to be clear, it was actually a necessary procedure for my uncle and his people to "dissect" together.

When my uncle's family comes to see the works, usually only five or six representatives are sent. If the deceased is a woman, then there are more women, and if it is a man, there are more men. You don't need to bring any gift letters except some fragrant paper when you look at the works.

The main task of watching the living is to take away the clothes of the dead and look carefully. One is to see if there are any symptoms of poisoning, and the other is to see if there are scars on your body. Only in this way can we judge whether the deceased died well and whether he was abused before his death. When reading the works, the family of the deceased old man should also have a close relative present, or there should be a respected person in the village.

Living in the old days is a means to safeguard the rights and interests of the deceased. First, the bride's family protects the personal rights and interests of married women from being abused and dying in the man's house. Second, when married women are old, they will protect the personal rights and interests of married women and the old couple and prevent the old couple from being abused by their children and dying.

Nowadays, watching live broadcast has lost its former meaning and become a traditional etiquette.

Mourn one's family

The bride's family mourned for the married woman or son-in-law. Some places are also called "eating tofu", which means attending a funeral. In the old society, if the deceased died abnormally after seeing the living at the bride's house, then the family would open a ancestral hall and the whole family would eat "human tofu" at the deceased's house, and the next thing would be more troublesome. If the deceased reaches the end of his life, his immediate family members will invite a drum band, carry a special suitcase and go to mourn with generous gifts. The filial family received the uncle's family with the highest etiquette. Everyone who attends my uncle's funeral will attend the funeral. Generally, it will not be sent to the cemetery, but it will turn back quickly on the way. There is an old saying that "the faster my uncle turns, the faster my nephew delivers."

China has a vast territory, and funeral culture is also a local custom. Sometimes, the same village, different surnames, funeral customs are different. The customs I mentioned above are mainly in the south, even in the south, and the funeral customs vary from place to place. But one thing is the same, that is, whether a married woman dies or her husband dies, it must be reported to my uncle's house, unless there is no one at my uncle's house, which was and is now. This is human nature.