Very funny copy to send to friends

I. Why are you nearsighted? In order to look down on the world's affairs, that's why your eyes are blurred.

II. Laziness is a very strange thing, it makes you realize the truth: trying hard doesn't always lead to success, but not trying is easy.

3. One day asked his wife why so many good people did not choose. Bias choose me, wife: because the first time you come to your home, your home what all your mother said, your father fart dare not put one, people say this gene will be inherited ...... Oh, you win!

Four. One day when dad and hubby drink together nagging, there has never been much emotional intelligence dad suddenly said to hubby: if you that day if you do not love my daughter, you give me to say. At that time I was very touched: that you want to take me home dad? My dad said to my husband: I let her remarry, can not do my son-in-law, do my brother ......

V. Afraid of being used by others? As long as you become a loser, no one can use you.

VI. Today received a customer tour, visited a temple, the customer worship read: pray for blessing me to meet a good marriage soon. I told him awkwardly, this is the Temple of Literature enshrined in the Confucian saint, is to seek academic achievement. The goods listened to think about continuing to pray: that please bless me to marry a female college student it! I KAO, or you bull!

VII. Traditional culture has been seriously lost, the ancient women could all write poems. The modern woman can't do it anymore, she can only do the right thing.

Eight. My mom had two daughters, I look mediocre, my sister looks like a flower, asked my mom: how so unfair? My mom replied: the first batch of goods, not much experience, the quality of more or less almost.

9. Friends party, I packed up is going to go out, mom said my back shirt wrinkled, let me stand there and so on, she helped me deal with. I'm so smart that I've been in the gutter, forgetting that I just bought a radio iron for her mom a few days ago! Now the back of a hot piece of burns, my mom also said aggrieved: thought you skin thick enough, not afraid of hot ......

Ten. My family is a democratic family, son since the school class, every time you get up, will cry and cry do not want to eat breakfast do not want to go to school, grandma is always a long and earnest persuasion, grandpa looked at the newspaper with a face of helplessness, mom hurriedly cleaned up, and I am the coaxing of the son of the eyebrow. Finally, the whole family held a meeting and felt that this is not the way to go on, the final result: beat, the child is always crying at school, most likely it is itchy skin, beat it will be fine!

Xi. The day slowly warmed up, sent his girlfriend back to the dormitory. She suddenly said: look, look, look. I looked at the original a girl in the dormitory to change clothes, looking at her eyes to share the joy, I am entangled, this Nima is a brother, or wife ah?

12. daughter-in-law traveled. About a few buddies drinking at home, the family's old dog has been outside the door "grunting" barking, presumably want to come in to pick up the bones to eat, I heard some annoyed at the door of the buddies shouted: go, open the door to put the old dog in, the results of the door opened, found that the old man is angrily stood outside the door ... ... ...Dad, can you listen to my explanation? Dad ...... Dad you don't go ah!

13. My nephew likes to play in my room. I always thought it was because I was usually good to him, he likes me, until the day I heard him and his friends between the conversation: go, go to my aunt's room to play, the living room dirty grandma and to scold me, my aunt's room is messy as a pigsty, dirty or not anyway can not be seen ......

Fourteen. That summer, saw my ex-boyfriend with a ......90 points beauty hand in hand shopping, I impulsively chased up and cried and slapped him, then turned around and left! Behind him came his anxious call: honey, you listen to my explanation! I fantasized that he said it was his cousin or relative, while stomping his feet and shouting: I do not listen to me I do not listen to me I do not listen to me ...... while turning back, but it turned out that he was chasing that 90 points in a desperate attempt to explain.

15. When I was a child, my family raised chickens. Mom said fattened to kill the stew, rabbit fattened to kill and eat, pig fattened for New Year's slaughter, one year New Year's Eve, my mother pinched my face and said fat, I was on my knees, a snotty and tearful, said: I often do not wash my feet, and in the morning do not wash my face, stinking death is not good ah! But my mom smiled badly and said that wait for the night to wash clean, not and you guys blow, night bath my mom and my sister two people also failed to press me in the bath tub, the desire to survive is too strong ......

15. my cousin dog year Wang to high fever. I refused to go to the hospital, I went to coax him: the hospital nurse, are single it, you go to pick the most beautiful one as a girlfriend! So cousin went to the estimated New Year's Eve, a beautiful nurse did not have a, auntie has a number of, playing the bottle of the cousin said: I looked at half a day, the blood test of the aunt, is the most beautiful in the aunt of the one ......

XVII. In the morning, the bath has just opened, first came a female customer, but she went into the male bath. When she was naked, the male janitor came in and told her that this was a men's bath. The female customer was very angry: why wait for me to get naked, before you tell me this is a male bath? The male administrator: I have to confirm it thoroughly, who knows whether you are a man or a woman ah!

Eighteen. I high school once went out to play all night, sneak home, eat breakfast, mom look at my face poor, she asked me how, I said uncomfortable. Mom freaked out, can not distinguish dragged me to the hospital, and then mom to register, I was too sleepy, 'bam' a crooked lying in a chair fell asleep, confused to hear my mom crying and shouting doctor: doctor, my daughter can not be, are in shock ......

19. At home waiting for takeout. Someone knocked on the door, I was busy to open the door, as soon as I opened the door to go out to pick up the takeaway, do not want to be tripped by the threshold, directly to the takeaway little brother pounced on the ground, the little brother was scared, stammered: big ...... big brother, I ...... I have a normal sexual orientation, like the female!

Twenty. Daughter and small friends chatting in the living room. I insist on running every morning, I insist on memorizing words every morning ...... to my daughter when said: I insist on stealing an ice cream every morning! Hey! Should the old saying, really good children are other people's families ......

Twenty-one. Today I saw the goddess online, I sent a message to her: in? Ten minutes later, the goddess replied: in the pull, what's the matter? I'm not sure what I'm talking about, but I'm not sure what I'm talking about! The goddess actually replied to me! I held down the excitement of the mood to reply: that you first pull, pull finish and then chat, I'm not in a hurry ...... an hour has passed, the goddess of how not yet finished pulling.

22. With my husband went out. Far from seeing a grilled squid stall, I said: husband, see squid I want to eat, how to do? Did not wait for me to finish, my husband immediately ran to the stall that, still in his thoughtful touched when he ran back, and then whispered to me: I said to him that the city management will be coming in a while, so that his grasp to go ......

Twenty-three. The neighborhood is an old neighborhood, all the facilities are very old. A summer fly more than simply can not enter, one day I am squatting in the toilet, I heard a young man outside the side of the buddy sings and walked in, simply a comedian! Seeing so many flies actually laugh at themselves and say: all up, do not delay me to give you dinner!

Twenty-four. In the game team group chat, there is a man and I want to meet, I refused. Then he said: I have your picture, I have your location, I can find you! At this time my best friend came out and said: don't be so childish, her beauty face over the photo even her mother does not recognize, you can find her?