Northern Jiangsu marriage customs and habits

There are four procedures for proposing marriage, visiting relatives, getting married, and making a contract. First by the male parents to invite the media door to propose marriage, after obtaining the consent of the female party to post "respectfully arrested". The female side by the visit said "respectfully", the male side that is, please fortune-teller marriage, such as the fate of eight suitable, that is, the matchmaker "back to the good", set the date. The main condition for choosing a spouse was "the right family", and it all depended on "the order of the parents and the words of the matchmaker", and the parties concerned were not allowed to participate in the process, especially the female party, who could only "follow the chicken when marrying the chicken and the dog when marrying the dog". Private dating and free love are against etiquette, and are not only forbidden by parents, but also condemned by society. Early marriages are more common, and there are even bad practices such as consanguineous marriages, rushes, child brides, and marriages with the fingers in the womb.

Na Hire

When a marriage is arranged, the bride price must be paid in order to show that the agreement has been made. After the betrothal, the man must give his parents-in-law gifts at the Dragon Boat Festival, Mid-Autumn Festival and Spring Festival, with no less than four gifts for each festival. In the old days, Qintong grain market prosperity, business travelers gathered, into some of the unique customs, and for the local rich families to follow. "Back to the good" appointment, the male party has to send a gift to the family, called "holding sheep and wine": by a person holding a white sheep wearing a red waistcoat, corner of the red silk tie to lead, followed by a quart of wine, wine altar on the sticker "hi, hi! The wine altar is labeled with patterns such as "Joy", "Mandarin Ducks Playing in the Water", and "Dragon Breeze Presents Good Luck". Another 40 quintals (or 16-24 quintals) gift boxes, containing hazelnut, pine, Fei, chestnut, lychee, cinnamon, lotus seeds, jujubes, long rice dumplings, sharkskin, and jewelry, fabrics and so on. The woman's family back shoes, hats, clothing and other things, some also returned rice paper, ink, ink stone, ink stone, lake pen and gold rings. Before marriage, the matchmaker "call", set the "bride price" and wedding date. Bride price depending on the family of men and women by the two sides of the agreement, but the old world is concerned about the show; there are greedy for money and gifts to yield, there are also unbearable and "change the marriage" or even "bride kidnapping" people.

Weddings

were regarded as a lifelong event. There is a sedan chair, package open door seal, on the sedan chair, receive the sedan chair, worship, sitting in the rich and powerful, haunted the new room, back to the door and so on a number of procedures, not only ceremonial ceremonies, and spend a lot of money. Lanterns and colorful, sound and play music, ancestor worship, worship God, organizing banquets, pay guests and thank the matchmaker, lively and extraordinary. Before the girl out of the cabinet to "hungry marriage", on the palanquin to "brush the palanquin"; the bride on the palanquin to carry the "I Ching" (the rural areas with "three official scriptures ") to ward off evil spirits, that is, after the sedan chair is not allowed to open their eyes, can not open their mouths. When the girl on the sedan chair, the mother routinely cry sedan chair, Qintong area crying words: "windy, scrape the storm, the matchmaker's box right away to, a handful of beads sprinkled to the east, you have to call the mother-in-law after calling the public; a handful of beads sprinkled to the south, you have to eat the cake to eat after the group; a handful of beads sprinkled to the west, I do not know people pots and pans high to bowls of low; a handful of beads sprinkled to the north, the daughter tonight to leave the night. The pea blossoms and fries, the mother raises the daughter for nothing." Some places to give the bride "pressure", sedan chair to the door deliberately not let the newcomer into the door. Baimi around the door in the room hanging sickle "kill Wei". Go to sleep, the groom intentionally press the shoes and clothes on the bride's shoes and clothes. Women also have to deal with the method, that is, before the sedan chair, the bride's shoes for the high base on the table, indicating that the steps to high; sedan chair carrying an elastic pocket, such as the other side of the "pressure", the bride will be the mouth of the bag is tightened, said not to listen to the aunts and sisters-in-law of pro-talking. Jiangyan area in the bride to sleep, first by the groom to solve the 3 buttons, and then by the bride stripped; groom to wrap the bride's waist, and before the bride went to bed in the waist within the white fruit dates and rice cakes and so on sprinkled on the bed, so that the child to snatch, in order to show that early to get a son, the bride and then undressed to the groom. The groom should be inside the pocket of the gift of gold, to the bride. The day after the wedding, the in-laws threw the bride a piece or a pot of flour, try the bride sewing, cooking skills. The newlyweds are not allowed to visit each other's homes within one month of the wedding.

Since then, the procedure has been simplified, some enlightened people in the city, including rural areas, advocating civilized weddings, by the celebrant, witnesses, introducers and guests to congratulate the bride and groom to accompany the bride and groom to perform the rituals of the old customs are exempted, and won the approval of the community. The anti-Japanese democratic government even vigorously advocated self-identical love, marriage autonomy, and new marriage arrangements, opposed feudal arranged and bought and sold marriages, and outlawed bigamy and concubinage, which was y supported by the masses. After the founding of the People's Republic of China, the cadres took the lead in organizing new marriages, and held a tea party to let the newcomers briefly fall in love, sing songs and tell jokes, which was both simple and lively, and the city followed suit. Rural professional matchmakers gradually disappeared, although there is a medium, but there must be a man and a woman for each six, sedan chair gradually for the cart, bicycle or wooden boat instead of the wedding ceremony is greatly simplified, asking for a dowry or large-scale wedding by public opinion criticism. To the late 60's, the government advocated late marriage, the new wedding gradually become the trend. Many young people chose to get married on holidays such as May 1, National Day, New Year's Day and Spring Festival. Some villages do not organize collective marriages. Early marriages were greatly reduced, and "bride kidnapping" and "child brides" disappeared. Into the 80s, with the economic development, people's lives improve, the wind of big fuss began to rise, especially in recent years, the competition for comparison, the wind of the big extravagance is flourishing. Dowry from the old 3 big (watches, bicycles, sewing machines) to the new 3 big (color TV, refrigerator, washing machine), some young people in the city also want to pursue carpets, sofas, stereos, VCRs and other high-grade goods. Rural areas in addition to the new furniture, but also to create a new house. Weddings are more and more big, easily 10 tables and even dozens of tables; banquet grade continues to improve, pig six bowls have been a few plates and dishes, a few fried a few burned instead of fish maw, hooves and other must-have. From the furniture to get married, have to spend more than ten thousand yuan. There are people who worship along the old customs, to the ancient pride. This is a free love marriage, preferring to invite the media to welcome, in order to "marry"; sedan chair has long been extinct, but have to sedan car; some of the old customs have long been abolished, but also in some of the wedding ceremony to repeat. Newly married men and women rely on their parents because of their low income, and many families spend years of savings and even debt to organize their children's weddings.