Someone help me make up a funny skit in English.

1. Xiao Ming, who likes to learn English, is looking for a chance to speak English day and night.　　One day, he accidentally bumped into a foreigner while walking, and he said, "I am sorry.　　"I am sorry, too." The foreigner replied.　　"What are you sorry for?" the foreigner asked.　　"I am sorry five..." said Ming.　　2. A Chinese teacher and an English teacher are often at odds with each other, so they often find chances to make sarcastic remarks about each other.　　One day, the enemy wanted to crash, the two words do not talk, scolding, the language teacher took out a note, told the English teacher to read.　　Above said: "dark room up to spring Zhu, pool number do river clothes". The English teacher could not help but read, read halfway to understand the bait. The English teacher thought; you say I am a big stupid cow, vegetarian monk. See I do not catch you. Just smelled down a ringing sound so not moving color, also took out a note, let the language teacher to read, to be read to half, can not help but blush, complacency, a moment no longer.　　Just see the above writer: peace war found (fart is what I put). 3.　　3. a junior high school students English textbook found the following horror words: dad dead bus mouse mom dead 爷死yes 哥死girls 妹死Mis goose姑死 big病故ju juice舅死死死光school 4. Shaanxi people in New York Chinatown opened a restaurant, the son when the waiter, mom tube money, dad do chef.　　One day, the store came a foreigner, ordered a set menu, eaten half, " bam ", the soup bowl hit.　　The son ran over to look at it and said: "The bowl is hit." The foreigner thought: "one dollar! " The foreigner thought: " one dollar,.... ..."　　Mom heard the sound and came over to see a broken bowl on the ground, and asked: "Who hit it? She saw a broken bowl on the floor and asked, "Who hit it?" The foreigner thought, "Three dollar? ..."　　The son said: " He hit it." The foreigner thought: " ten dollar? He hit it!" The foreigner thought: "ten dollar? ... ..."　　Mom says, "And one more bowl. "The foreigner thinks: "Hundred and one?! ... ..."　　Dad was chopping vegetables in the kitchen when he heard the noise outside and rushed out to see what was going on. In his haste, he forgot to put down the chopper.　　The foreigner's heart raced and his blood pressure skyrocketed when he saw his dad standing in the dining room with a kitchen knife in his hand, but what broke his heart even more was his dad's words.　　The dad said to his son, who was ladling soup on the stove, "It's hot! " The foreigner: " ten thousand?!!!!