Stand-up comedy lines

Don't get caught up in what you're doing, but look at how many junkies there are: book junkies, theater junkies, wine junkies, and money junkies. I'm not sure if you're going to be able to get a good deal on a new product, but I'm sure you'll be able to get a good deal on a new product! I'm not sure how much I'm going to be able to do, but I'm sure I'm going to be able to do it," he said.

My second uncle used to work as a jeweler in a jewelry store, and what did he do? I'm not sure what I'm talking about, but I'm not sure what I'm talking about," he said! The first thing you need to do is to get a good look at the pearls, onyx, jade, diamonds, and the glasses, and you don't know how many degrees they are, but you can see them from a distance, as if you were wearing a hat!

One day, he went to eat six bowls, what do you mean eat six bowls? It is to attend a wedding, not only to eat but also drink some wine, dizzy to go home, walk to the south gate there, it Qing! I didn't pay attention, but I fell on my head and lost my glasses. I touched them in the winter, even with the ice and snow! What the hell? Ice cold stick hard, pick up a look --- emerald! There is a slap long and short, an inch wide, this jadeite to over five, the master of the jade, worth the old silver la. By the light of the moon he took a good look at the center of the white is Fei, both sides of the green is Cui, Buddha Cui! How do you call it Buddha's Cui? You stand up this piece of jade, like the Buddha's light behind the Buddha, so it is called Buddha's Light Cui, how can this place have such a treasure? In the past, there was a Prince's residence at the South Gate! I'm not sure which prince dropped it. I deserve to be rich! I turn it into money, wipe back to run Cuihua gold store to go!

The jewelry store at that time, there is a collection of work at night, although the night on the grille, it left a small window, so big, my second grandfather to the window in front of the door to beat: "the shopkeeper! The shopkeeper! I'm sorry! I'm delivering some 'specialties'!" The term "precious goods" is used to describe rare treasures. An old man was on duty inside, and when he heard "precious goods", he turned on the light! Turn on the light: "Coming!" Put on his clothes and go down to the ground, snap! Pull open the small window: "What kind of goods?"''

"Emerald!"

"Bring it to me!" My second grandfather carefully, from the pocket to pull out this jade! I'm not going to be able to afford it if you drop it! You can't afford to pay for it if you drop it!" The old man gently took it, walked over to the counter, turned it over to look at it, tuned it over to look at it, and snapped! And turn on the headlights, open the drawer out of a magnifying glass, inside and outside to look at half a day, and then walked to the small window

side: "Who's pretty goods?"

My second oldest was delighted: "Mine!"

"Stick your head in!" That small window is only so big, big head can not reach in, thanks to my second grandpa small head, the upper side of the stretch, the bottom of a slip, squeak! I got in! The first thing you need to do is to get your head out of your ass, and then you'll be able to get your head out of your ass, and then you'll be able to get your head out of your ass! I'm not sure how much I'm going to pay for this. The guy said, "Why does it taste so bad? I'm not sure how much I'm going to be able to pay for it.

Guess how much the old man paid? A hand to give this big number --- pop! This big mouth, my second grandfather can not even hide! His head was stuck!

"What are you doing hitting people!"

"What's wrong with hitting you? You're up here in the middle of the night, tossing me around, and you've got some pretty jade! What is this?"

My second grandfather took a closer look at the frozen cabbage

The traditional monologue

The first time I saw this, it was the first time I'd seen it.