Taking traditional culture as an example, why is there a tragedy of "lovers not getting married"?

I personally believe that in China's thousands of years of feudal society, young men and women marry at the behest of their parents. In addition to the traditional constraints, they also pay attention to the reasonable mix of family and children's marriage. Therefore, the marriage of young men and women is not free,? There are a lot of tragedies in which "lovers are hard to get married".

I will illustrate this tragedy only from stories or legends in books. For example, the love story of Dong Yong and the Seven Fairies in the fairy tale is well known. Dong Yong is said to have no father or mother. The Weaving Maiden is immortal. Immortals are supposed to be free, but when he fell in love with them, they could not marry. It is the gods who are the most powerful. She enlightens the earth god, who enlightens the acacia tree to matchmaking, which removes Dong Yong's excuse for not having a matchmaker. The sky and the earth say no, the clouds and the earth have no matchmaker. This is the testimony that a marriage must have a matchmaker. The latter part is the fate of her parents. The weaver's marriage has no parents' lives. In addition, the Jade Emperor in the sky, the love story of the Cowherd and the Weaving Maiden ended in tragedy.

Another example is the love story in Dream of the Red Chamber. Young men and women read, recite poetry and live together in the Grand View Garden. The two young no-guesses, when they were children, talented women, instructed each other. However, the two young men and women, under the orders of their parents and the words of the matchmaker, did not dare to cross the thunderbolt! In the end, the marriage of Jia Baoyu and Xue Baochai is the only respect Jia Baoyu's family has for the orders of Jia Mother. A pair of lovers parted in the best possible way, leading to the tragedy of love that makes it difficult for lovers to marry.

In feudal society, marriage was not only ordered by parents and matchmakers, but also constrained by feudal ethics. This is the argument that a daughter-in-law has been a mother-in-law for many years. In feudal society, daughters-in-law were disciplined by their mothers-in-law. Even though some lovers became family members, some were separated by their mother-in-laws. The love tragedy between Lu You and Tang Wan in the Song Dynasty illustrates this point. Of course, there are other reasons that make it difficult to have a lover. I won't talk about them.

After the founding of New China, the people's government implemented the marriage policy of freedom of love and independent marriage. Young men and women broke through the marriage cages of feudal society and old China, making lovers happy at last, and the era when it was difficult for lovers to get married was gone. This is social progress.