What etiquette do Chaoshan people need to get married?

Chaoshan Marriage Custom With the development of the times, Chaoshan people's weddings are becoming more and more fashionable, and many young men and women have long since got rid of the marriage custom of "parents' orders and matchmakers' words". However, traditional weddings still exist. Propose, also known as propose. That is, the matchmaker proposes to the man, or the matchmaker introduces the woman to the man first, and then proposes to the woman after the man approves. Get married. Here are two links. After the two sides agreed to get married, the matchmaker wrote the woman's name, birthday, place of origin and ancestors on the Geng sticker and sent it to the man. If nothing unexpected or unlucky happens in the man's house within three days, such as throwing bowls and basins, it is called "three days is good" With this good sign, the man agreed to exchange posts with Geng. After changing the Geng post, please ask someone to divine and get married to confirm whether men and women are born together or together. Engaged. Enter the engagement stage after marriage, that is, the man prepares the gift and the woman is engaged. Gifts are usually a pair of gold earrings or a gold ring, as well as a gold necklace, sugar and noodles, which are all symbols of engagement. When the woman is engaged, she should give candy and cakes to her relatives and neighbors, inform them of their engagement, and then engage in bride price. Hire, also known as rent. In the past, the bride price of rich people was gold and silver, colored satin, pig and sheep wine and fruit; The poor are betel nuts and chicken wine. Chaozhou people regards betel nut as an auspicious symbol and a distinctive employment gift. Modern bride price includes physical objects and cash. There must be more than four items: sugar, noodles, Daji (Chaozhou orange), gold and silver jewelry, cloth, cakes and so on. , but they must not be odd numbers, but even numbers. Cash, also called bride price money, is divided into one, two and four, but they are all multiples. During the engagement, the woman should return the cake and food in the engagement, and give back "mandarin ducks and bananas", oranges, pig hearts and so on. Yuanyang and banana are two bananas that coexist, symbolizing a hundred years old; The orange homonym "Ji" symbolizes good luck; The pig's heart (half left in the woman's body) symbolizes concentricity. At this time, the two sides will also solemnly distribute cakes and food from each other's gifts to relatives and neighbors to report the wedding. Friends and neighbors should also congratulate them in return. Invitation date, after the engagement ceremony, choose the date of marriage and tell the woman, including telling her when to cut the wedding dress, when to "pull a face", when to take a shower and when to get married. Most of the invitations are invited in the dark, and the hipster custom still retains the wedding custom of welcoming the bride in the dark, which is really an ancient heritage. The wedding ceremony is the ceremony for the groom to marry the bride at the woman's house, and it is also the most important procedure in the wedding. There are two kinds of wedding banquets: one is the groom's wedding banquet, and the other is that the man invites a "lucky man" to meet him. At this time, the bride often burst into tears, which is called "crying marriage". On the one hand, I cry for being away from my parents. On the other hand, it is said that only tears can make my parents rich. When the sedan chair comes to the door of her husband's family, they will set off firecrackers to welcome her. The groom kicked off the sedan chair, rolled up the curtain, pulled off the wishful thinking on the bride's head and put on airs on her forehead. Kicking a sedan chair and tying a greeting message are intended to give the bride a fright: everything must be as her husband wishes in the future. This is a hint of husband's power. Then the bride stepped over a pile of burning "fire smoke" under the threshold with the help of the bridesmaid. After the bride entered the room, accompanied by the "mother-in-law" invited by her husband's family, she "married" the groom, entered the bridal chamber, and served tea to her elders and peers in the main room. At this time, the green mother will recite carols beside her. On the bride's wedding day, her family will give her husband lily soup. May the bride please everyone in her husband's family. The next day, I sent the bride a soup of fungus and pig heart, hoping that the bride would not forget her family and relatives. Only for the third time can I stay at my parents' house for a few days and talk about my feelings of missing my parents. Girls here also have the custom of giving money to their sisters when they get married. The "sister money" is given by the groom who came to marry to the younger brothers and sisters who sent the bride on the road. Generally, 4 yuan's score is 4.8. Give your sister money to a man and a woman to show "good". 448 points, meaning "the world is good" and "the world is not divided (separated)". The groom should hold a solemn ceremony of "fixing the bed" when decorating the new house. When I was in bed, I asked the fortune teller to choose a date, and the orientation of the bed was also particular. When you are in bed, you should do "four sentences" for good luck. When the bride wears heavy makeup and gets on the sedan chair, the bride's family will pour a basin of water on the sedan chair and say, "When the water is poured on the sedan chair, the bride will become new." Send my best wishes to the married bride. However, of course, it is no longer a sedan chair, but bicycles or motorcycles and cars. In the past, the bride had to have two pairs of wooden shoes in her dowry, which not only facilitated her daily life, but also meant "growing old together" or "following suit". After the bride enters the door, she has to get up early to cook and cook a bowl of fragrant rice by herself. The old man, the old woman and her husband's brothers and sisters got up and invited them to taste some. It is said that this bowl of sweet rice, sugar should be brought from her family, and when cooking, you must mix your own saliva into the rice soup. Of course, saliva mixed with rice soup has to be made quietly, and people who eat it don't have to ask more. This custom means that the husband-in-law eats fragrant rice with the saliva of the bride, and the bride and the whole family can live in harmony. During the three days of their wedding, the bride and in-laws should avoid meeting each other. On the fourth morning, the bride will go to the public well where her new home is located to fetch water. Before pumping water, put a handful of brown sugar and soil brought by her family into the well. This is to make the bride not "acclimatized" and live in harmony with her neighbors. In recent years, a folk activity that has arisen in the bridal chamber is to worship the god of wealth at midnight. No matter where, the climax of the wedding is "holding a wedding". The same is true of Chaoshan. The sachet was embroidered by the bride in the boudoir before marriage. People should judge the bride's dexterity, clumsiness, diligence and laziness from the skill and quantity of these embroidery crafts. If you want to see the bride's face, you must say "four words" of good luck before the bride will put down the fan that covers her face. There are also some humorous hooligans who use the method of first restraining and then promoting, or first restraining and then promoting, so that a bride does not know how to answer. In the past, there were many special wedding customs in Chaoshan area. With the progress of society, some of these marriage customs have been eliminated, and some still have names, but their forms have completely changed. Finger marriage (also known as early marriage): an old friend or close relative, a man and a woman, two pregnant babies are designated by both parents as future husband and wife, which is called finger marriage. When both men and women grow up, whether they like it or not, their parents choose a day to get married. This is called "changing rooms"

Etiquette of Chaoshan daughter-in-law:

Teach family rules when getting married: when a woman gets married, in addition to the great truth and knowledge of being a daughter-in-law taught by her parents and elders, there is also a ceremony to let her daughter sit on the water tank before getting on the sedan chair. This custom implies that a daughter should be "open-minded" like a water tank, open-minded and not haggle over every ounce.

Know the rice jar: Listen to Weng Gu introduce the location of the rice jar and the number of people cooking porridge at home.

Collecting tank: Listen to Weng Gu telling me where to draw water, where to hang buckets and bucket hooks, and how to keep drinking water hygienic.

Stir the rice jar: stir with a wooden stick to show the daughter-in-law that there is no cooked rice in it, indicating that it cannot be wasted.

Make a fire: teach your daughter-in-law to make a fire and cook. It is customary for the bride to cook instead of aunt Weng or sister-in-law when she enters the door. Even if the rich family has a maid to cook, it will take 12 days, or four months a month to do it well.

Eat standing up: When the bride is new here, she should respect the old and love the young, start eating standing up, and give meals to her elders. After staying for four or twelve days, the parents advised the daughter-in-law to sit and eat or not to add meals to the elders to avoid this gift. Also, you can't stand on the threshold and sit in the purlin; Hold tea according to the level of guest and host.

Washing clothes: men's clothes should be washed first, women's clothes should be washed first, elders' clothes should be washed first, younger ones should be washed later, dark clothes should be washed first, and light clothes should be washed later.