Traditional Culture Encyclopedia - Traditional stories - What is filial piety?
What is filial piety?
Filial piety is gratitude. Gratitude is a kind of strength, gratitude is a kind of responsibility and gratitude is an obligation! "The Book of Songs" and "Er Ya Zhong" say: "Parents are filial when they do good deeds". Mencius also said: "To be a dutiful son, the biggest thing is to respect your loved ones". In other words, to support and serve parents wholeheartedly, respect and care for the "shun" of the elderly means to obey and act according to the wishes of the elderly, mainly in the way of providing for the elderly, living habits and hobbies. It can also be said that "Shun" is the concrete embodiment of "filial piety".
Children are born and raised by parents. Feed them from birth, nurse them, wash them, and take care of them when they are sick. If it is an incurable disease, they are willing to give their lives for their own safety; A little longer, teach basic life skills, provide reading, care about its growth and never stop. Parents' love for their children is lifelong, which can be described as: family affection is priceless and deep. Children are always in debt in front of their parents.
Filial piety of children to their parents is a basic morality and the foundation of social morality. Filial piety is human nature. The true meaning of filial piety is: "report its source, respect its life and seek its development."
Parents should do: "respect and care, obey their wishes, eat and live without loss, keep their clothes clean and warm, and see a doctor if they are sick." Let parents "live with self-esteem", "live healthily", "live happily" and "live profitably". "Gold is not enough, and no one is perfect". Parents' faults should be gently persuaded, patiently and gently pointed out, and parents should never be rudely reprimanded and accused, let alone maliciously ridiculed.
What is filial piety and how to do it is true filial piety?
Filial piety has many meanings, from economy to spirit. But modern filial piety doesn't mean buying something or eating a meal. What is more needed is caring for parents from the heart. Maybe it's just to help the elderly comb their hair, maybe it's just to pinch their parents' shoulders, or even just to say hello, but this kind of heart will move parents and children together, so it's good to have a heart.
What the elderly need now is spiritual support. The living conditions are good, the economy is no longer worried, and the feeling of always feeling happy when children bring things back with some money no longer exists. It is better to just see if the child has gained weight or lost weight and be willing to cook for him. These will give the old people a pleasure that they can't get economically, and this feeling from psychology will be more lasting and more real.
I didn't realize the needs of parents for children before. It was not until my son went to boarding middle school this year that I suddenly lost a lot, and I realized that my parents must have such a loss for me. We are always immersed in the "busy, busy, busy again" life, but we don't know where the real meaning of life lies. What we need is not more money and more world recognition, but actually just a knowing smile from our family. When you put your parents in the same position as your children, knowing your parents' smiles will also bring you pleasure.
After the reform and opening up in China, people's lives have been greatly improved. With the process of social aging, the elderly no longer worry about the economic situation, so the way of support will undoubtedly change. The competition in modern society is very fierce. Time, competition and choice are often mentioned, which will affect the relationship between parents and children. In fact, the parent-child relationship in modern China has changed, and it is no longer completely bound by tradition, especially after women left their families and family revolution 49 years later.
In the commodity society, the change of this relationship is more intense, which requires us to adjust the traditional way of life. When the basic material needs are met, people will have more pursuits and spiritual needs will appear, which is also a sign of social progress.
The symbol of modern society is rationalization. Whether it is social arrangement or interpersonal communication, maximizing interests becomes a rational choice, but family ties cannot be rationalized. Even if you say that you can put your parents in a nursing home, someone will take care of your daily life and diet, and there is medical security, but people are emotional animals, and there will still be emotional elements in this rational arrangement.
How to be filial is a problem that modern people need to face. It is impossible to support parents completely according to the function of providing for the aged provided by the family. We should change a new way, which not only embodies the rational side, but also allows people to take care of their lives. At the same time, take care of family relations.
We should consider some problems existing in education in recent decades. Instead of advocating traditional "filial piety", people really need to know that people have spiritual pursuits besides economic pursuits, which you can't ignore. In the process of modern education and socialization, there is a lack of moral and ethical education. Without this concept, people will be too busy to shirk the responsibility of filial piety, in fact, they just ignore the meaningful part of life.
Many westerners don't pay so much attention to "filial piety", but it's not that they don't pay attention to family ties. They live more comfortably than we do. Modern China people are in such a hurry that they lack the simplest but most important family fun, such as teasing grandchildren and licking calves, and we often ignore the most basic and ordinary enjoyment of people. We should reflect on how to live and live more meaningfully. Knowing these most common but important feelings, the so-called contradiction between the two generations is no longer a contradiction.
Support for the elderly is no longer food and clothing, but spiritual needs. For example, many children are against sex. In fact, the physical needs of the elderly are not great, but more of a spiritual dependence. Therefore, giving parents a spiritual dependence is also a way of support and a kind of filial piety.
What is filial piety? How do you usually show filial piety to your parents?
Filial piety is the traditional virtue of the Chinese nation. In this winter vacation, "filial piety homework" let me know a lot, let me know that it is not easy for my parents ... When I poured tea for my parents and hung my legs to comb my hair, my parents were so happy that their faces were written with joy. Although they know this is the homework I have to do at school, they are still very happy. In retrospect, I did too little for my parents. But my parents gave me everything selflessly. Suddenly, I felt very ashamed. On the day I waited on my parents, I thought how much my parents wanted to stop for a minute and eat my steamed rice at that moment. They all praised me and said, "My daughter is so nice! Yes, I cook so well myself, not to mention my parents. My parents gave me a lot of encouragement when I communicated with them. Yes, I will work hard to get into my ideal university and realize my dream of becoming a famous director. In the near future, I hope to see my name in some TV series to make my parents happy. When I grow up, I must respect my parents. Even if I am busy at work, I will spend more time chatting with my parents twice every three days. Because I know that this is what parents all over the world want most after their children succeed. In short, I must make my parents happy and make them proud of me. Everyone knows that our parents have given us selfless love, but not many people really learn to be grateful for this close relative. In this world, my parents love me the most. They gave me flesh and blood, nurtured me and taught us to know ourselves and the world. Be a useful person. Father's love is a mountain, great, solid and broad. He taught us to be strong, to remember tolerance and to know how to control ourselves. Motherly love is the sea, warm, selfless and delicate. You taught us how to treat everyone and everything in the world with love Just cherish the happiness in life. When my father finished the topic, I still didn't understand. These are all from them. From now on, I will honor my parents with a grateful heart, not enjoying the love my parents brought me as before, but the care I brought them.
What is filial piety?
Meng Wenxiao. Confucius said: No violation. Fan Chi told me, "Sun Meng asked me about filial piety, and I said," There is no violation. Fan Chi said: What is it? Confucius said: the things in life are courtesy; Death, ritual burial, ritual sacrifice. Meng asked about filial piety. Confucius said: Parents only worry about their illness. Ziyou asks filial piety. Confucius said: filial piety today means that it can be raised. As for dogs and horses, both can be kept; Disrespect, why not? Xia Zi asks filial piety. Confucius said: color is difficult. If something happens, the disciple will handle it; There is wine and food, sir; Is it filial piety?
These four chapters are related, so they are explained together.
Meng Wenxiao. Confucius said: No violation. Fan Chi told me, "Sun Meng asked me about filial piety, and I said," There is no violation. Fan Chi said: What is it? Confucius said: the things in life are courtesy; When you die, you should be buried with ceremony and sacrificed with ceremony (Meng asked Confucius what filial piety was. Confucius said: You can't violate it. Later, when Fan Chi was driving for Confucius, Confucius told him about it and said, "Sun Meng asked me what filial piety is. I answered him: don't violate it. Fan Chi asked: What does this mean? Confucius said: when parents are alive, they should serve according to etiquette; When they die, they will be buried and sacrificed according to the ceremony.
According to Confucius' own interpretation, "non-violation" in this chapter should mean non-violation of etiquette.
As for why Confucius used two paragraphs to explain it, it did not violate it. Some scholars believe that Meng Nuoxian, Meng's father, is polite, so Confucius can be considered filial as long as he does not violate his father's will. But the general father's words and deeds are not consistent with etiquette. At this time, children should not be filial to their fathers, but should be filial to their courtesy.
Meng asked about filial piety. Confucius said: Parents only care about their own illness (Meng asked Confucius what filial piety is. Confucius said: Let parents worry only about their children's illness.
There are three interpretations of this chapter as follows: 1. Parents are only worried about their children's illness, so they must try their best to do everything well; 2. Parents only worry about their children's illness, and children should take care of themselves; Children should only worry about their parents' illness, and don't worry too much about others, otherwise they will make their parents uneasy.
I think the first meaning is broader, so I will explain it in detail as follows:
The implication of this chapter is that diseases are beyond people's control, and people have strong control in other aspects, so children must try their best to behave well in other aspects, so that parents will not worry about their children because of things other than diseases.
In fact, from the current medical point of view, there are still some causes or the degree of disease that we can control ourselves. For example, some infectious diseases have their own regional characteristics, so if you can't go to these places, you should try to avoid them (Taber's article "Don't enter dangerous countries" still has some similar meanings). If you must go, some preventive measures should not be omitted. Malaria, for example, can be prevented by taking medicine before going. In addition, some infectious diseases are related to personal behavior, so it is certainly possible and necessary to avoid dangerous behaviors, such as sexually transmitted diseases. There are also some chronic diseases, such as hypertension and diabetes. And you should take the medicine regularly according to the doctor's instructions, because it has a considerable relationship with the control of the disease; Proper diet is as important as exercise, and it can also be controlled by yourself. There are also some healthy behaviors, such as a balanced diet, maintaining weight, etc., which are also closely related to health. We should also pay attention to these.
From this perspective, the real meaning of Confucius' chapter may be understood as: children should try their best to do whatever they can do well, so that parents will not be disturbed by their children.
Ziyou asks filial piety. Confucius said: filial piety today means that it can be raised. As for dogs and horses, both can be kept; If disrespectful, why not? Ziyou asks Confucius what filial piety is. Confucius said: Today's filial piety is to be able to support and take care of parents. But the dogs and horses at home are also kept and taken care of! If you have less respect in your heart, how can you tell the difference between the two?
"As for dogs and horses, both can be kept" has two interpretations: 1. Dogs and horses are also raised by people; 2. Dogs and horses can also serve people; But according to the second explanation, it seems that the word "you" is not needed.
Xia Zi asks filial piety. Confucius said: color is difficult. If something happens, the disciple will handle it; There is wine and food, sir; I used to feel filial (
Xia Zi asked Confucius what filial piety was. Confucius said: It is the hardest thing for the younger generation to keep respectful and cheerful. Something, young people do; When there is abundant food, it is eaten by elders; Can this be considered filial piety?
There are also two solutions to the color difficulty in this chapter: 1. What the younger generation looks like (see the picture above for details); 2. The appearance of elders: It means that you can know what your parents think before their appearance has changed.
The Analects of Confucius has the word "filial piety" in chapter 14. Among them, Confucius said that there are six chapters (5+ 1, reproduced as one chapter) related to the definition of filial piety, that is, learning is added to the four chapters of the political chapter. Confucius said: the father is there, watching his ambition; Father didn't. Observe his actions. Three years without changing your father's ways can be described as filial piety. Chapter 6(5) belongs to "two ends and four corners" heuristic teaching.
To sum up the meaning of chapter 6(5) is: when parents are alive, get along with them respectfully; Keep a happy expression; Behavior should be in harmony with righteousness and propriety; In addition, we must try our best to do everything well and try our best to reduce parents' worries about themselves; After the death of parents, the funeral ceremony should also be combined with ceremony; And we should always remember them and imitate their words and deeds, so that we can all do it. This is filial piety.
What is filial piety?
In the traditional sense of China, people think that it is the greatest filial piety for parents to have grandchildren, even grandchildren, or to have a good house to live in and a good meal to eat. In fact, I think the most important thing is to let parents have a healthy body, so that their old age will be less painful and healthier. I think this is the most important thing.
My parents have worked hard for nearly 30 years to support our family. It's hard. They don't expect much from us, just hope that we can live well. The only thing I want is to go home often and speak my mind. This is the greatest happiness. But because of work or our own life, our children have no concept of parents' needs in their own eyes. All they can think about is their own life and their own pursuit. As we all know, your ideal is based on your parents' efforts, but when you realize your ideal, you forget to pull it. Your parents may have given up many ideals and dreams because of you. They are old now and have nothing to pursue. They just want their children to live well. However, as children, we should have feelings with them and care about our parents who have worked hard for us for nearly 30 years. Therefore, I sincerely hope that young people born after 1980s can spare some time to spend more time with their parents, often go to the hospital for physical examination, buy something they like to eat, live together, spend as much time with their parents as possible, and don't forget their parents for their own careers and for a little money. If you don't live in the same city as your parents, always tell them what you are happy about, and don't be discouraged by their outdated knowledge.
No matter how much money you have in the future, family ties can't be bought with money. Don't leave too many regrets for your future. Cherish what you have now, and look for it after you lose it, which will leave you with eternal pain!
If children hate their parents, how can they say that they are a disadvantaged group compared with their parents? What can children do to their parents? I think parents have a responsibility to their children. Children hate their parents, and parents can teach them, not beat and scold them. How can parents hate you if they love their children? Now it seems that filial piety is one-sided, and children are good to their parents, not to their parents. This is feudal thought. Besides, many parents don't want to raise children now, and raising children to prevent old age is out of date. In short, it's up to them to raise or not when the children grow up and become financially independent.
Parents are good to their children. How can children be bad to you when they grow up? If parents don't love them, it is impossible to ask their children to be filial. Girls have the right to choose how to develop after they settle down. If they don't listen to their parents, they will only be destroyed. What is this filial piety? It's like a plant growing. If it looks bad or crooked, you can guide it from the side and make it return to a good direction. As long as we guide it and let it grow and develop naturally, it will grow well. I don't mean you can just play around without seeing it clearly. It's definitely not good to come out like this Although not as good as wild trees, they grow naturally. He will also know where to go. Now is the time to develop personality. One-sided so-called filial piety obliterates people's personality. Filial piety is always acceptable because it does not meet the requirements of the times.
What is filial piety and unfilial?
I can't help myself, the road is optional.
Filial piety and unfilial, in fact, it is difficult to have a specific definition, many things are not as simple as you think.
It's hard to say. You'd better not think about these questions for a while. You should think about yourself first, for example, if you have a job or finish your studies, then find a job yourself, have your own capital and get married yourself. Filial piety is mainly when parents are old. At that time, you did what you felt. Be filial to those who are willing to be filial, and stay away from those who are unwilling. There is no need to abuse them or anything.
When your parents are confused for a while, if your parents haven't come to their senses, you'd better stay away.
It is very important to thoroughly observe the humanity of some of your parents. As long as we understand the human nature of our parents, everything will be easy. As for your father's gambling, gambling is certainly not good, but gambling is not necessarily inhuman.
If you have yourself, don't have pressure, learn to get rid of it and relieve it. None of this means anything to you. Learn more Tai Chi, Yoga and Zen, observe more social occasions, get to know more mentors and friends, and mature yourself first. When you are mature, everything will be easy. You are not mature yet.
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