Chinese traditional wedding etiquette and customs

1, three books: according to traditional Chinese etiquette, refers to the process of rituals and recruitment of instruments, respectively, "book of engagement" - the book of engagement, the exchange of betrothal; "book of gifts The "Book of Gifts" - a list of gifts detailing the types and quantities of gifts to be exchanged at the time of the ceremony; and the "Book of Welcome" - a book to welcome the bride, to be used on the day of the wedding to receive the bride at the door. The "welcome book" - the book for welcoming the bride, which is used on the day of the wedding to receive the bride.

2, six rites: refers to the marriage from the marriage proposal, matchmaking to the marriage, the completion of the marriage procedures. Respectively, "Nacai" - commonly known as matchmaking, that is, the male family asked the matchmaker to go to the woman's home to propose marriage, the woman's home promised to discuss the marriage, the male family prepared gifts to go to the marriage proposal; "ask the name of the" - commonly known as the combination of the eight characters, the bride on the day of the wedding, the bride used to receive the door. --The male family asked the matchmaker to go to the female family to propose marriage, and after the female family agreed to discuss the marriage, the male family prepared gifts and went to propose marriage; "Ask the name" - commonly known as the combination of eight characters, ask the matchmaker to ask the female party's birth year, month and day, and name, in preparation for the ceremony of the combination of the marriage; "Naji" - that is, the male family divined the auspicious omen, and then prepared gifts to notify the female family, the marriage Naji" - that is, after the man's family divines an auspicious omen, he prepares a gift to inform the woman's family that the marriage has been preliminarily agreed upon. - choose an auspicious day to complete the marriage, the old selection of auspicious days are generally more bimonthly double day, do not like to choose three, six, November, three has a loose sound; do not choose six because you do not want the newcomer only half a lifetime of marriage; November implies the meaning of endless. "Pro welcome" - the wedding day, the man with a welcome book personally to the woman's home to welcome the bride.

3, bed: a few days before the wedding, choose a good day, in the new bed will be bedding, bed sheets, and then laid on the dragon and phoenix quilt, was sprinkled with a variety of fruits, such as peanuts, jujubes, cinnamon, lotus seeds, etc., which means that the newcomers have a child early. The person who carries the bed, the person who makes the bed and the person who spreads the joyful fruits are all carefully selected "good fortune" - parents alive, siblings, marriage and harmony, children, naturally, I hope that such people can bring good luck to the newcomers.

4, the cave: the old provisions, the groom's peers brothers can make the new room, the old people believe that "the new man does not make no hair, the more the more hair," and can be for the new man to drive away evil spirits, after the wedding, as good luck.

5, dowry: the woman's family accompaniment, is the woman's family status and symbol of wealth. The dowry is sent to the husband's family no later than the day before the wedding. In addition to the clothes and accessories, dowry is mainly some things that symbolize good omen, such as: scissors, meaning the double flight of butterflies; spittoon, also known as the children and grandchildren barrels; vase, meaning flowers and riches; shoes, meaning old together; ruler, meaning good land and so on. Of course, the customs and preoccupations are different from place to place.

6, on the head: men and women have to carry out the pre-wedding ceremony. Is also a good day, men and women in their respective homes by combing the head, a comb, a side to say aloud: a comb to the end, two comb comb to white hair, three comb comb to children and grandchildren all over the place, four comb comb to four silver shoots all standard Qi. The "head" is a very elaborate ceremony. Comb to use a new comb, to help "on the head" of the person must be "full of blessings," that is, the person is the six relatives are full, children full of people.

7, red umbrellas: the day of the wedding, by the bride's sisters or bridesmaids to help in the door of the bride's home, standing in the open air, sisters or bridesmaids in the bride's head open a red umbrella, meaning "open branches and spreading of leaves", and to the sky and the top of the umbrella to sprinkle rice.

8, the exchange of geng genealogy: male and female families exchange genealogy, as a proof of betrothal. After the matchmaker proposes marriage, if the eight characters of the man and the woman's hour and morning do not collide, the two sides will change the genealogy.

9, over the Wending, over the gift: the male family will choose an auspicious day, with some gifts to the female family, gifts are generally three animals, wine gift, etc., and formally presented the letter of engagement. After the "Wending" ceremony, the "Dali" ceremony will be held, which is the most solemn and important ceremony of the engagement; because after this ceremony, it is like the formalization of the marriage contract. As with the "Wending" ceremony, the man's family will choose an auspicious day and bring the bride price and various gifts to the woman's home, while the woman's family will also prepare gifts in return. The gifts are all even-numbered in order to symbolize "good things come in pairs".

10, crying marriage: According to the "Records of Rites", "Confucius said: the family of the bridegroom, three nights without resting the candle, thinking of separation. In ancient times, because transportation is not as convenient as in modern times, it is very difficult for daughters to see their families after they get married. As a matter of fact, a married woman could not return to her mother's home to visit her family at any time, as is the case today; she needed to get permission from her husband's family to go back to her mother's home. In addition, there is also a theory that the weeping marriages originated from the fact that women were not able to have free marriages in the ancient times, so they would use the songs of weeping marriages to complain about the unfair marriage system in the ancient times.

11, cover the head: the bride will usually be three feet long on one side of the square red scarf on the head, the red scarf called called "cover the scarf", commonly known as the red head. The red scarf is called the "cover scarf", commonly known as the red head. Usually it is the man who lifts the red head of the woman (for example, Ren Quan and Li Bingbing). There are two ways of describing this wedding custom: one is that it is a cover for shame; the other is that it originated in ancient times as a marauding marriage, which meant that the bride could never find her way back to her home after she had her head covered.

12, welcome the bride: ancient marriage, the man must go to meet the bride. The "kiss" is the most solemn of the six rites of passage. Without the groom to meet the bridegroom, there is no bride to get married. Ancient welcome, there are on foot, there is also a car, the more common is to use the eight sedan chair to meet the bride. Sedan chair people must be physically strong, meet other people's sedan chair, absolutely can not meet with them, must go around. Meet the bride back, but also to find a way back, to take the meaning of not going back. If the way through the temple, shrine, grave, wells, rivers and other places, must be married by the man's hand Zhang red felt will sedan chair cover, as the "evil" meaning. If you meet a funeral procession on the way, the person welcoming the bride will say, "Today is auspicious, meet Bao Cai! Because the harmonic of the coffin is "Guan Cai", that is, to see the meaning of the treasure, this is said mainly for the sake of good luck.

13, worship: also known as "worship heaven and earth", is a very important ceremony in the wedding. "Baitang" does not belong to the ancient "three books and six rituals", this marriage custom is very popular after the Song Dynasty, after "Baitang", the woman will formally become a member of the male family. "During the ceremony, the officiating master of ceremonies will say loudly, "Bow to heaven and earth, bow to the hall of heaven and earth, bow to the husband and wife, and enter the bridal chamber together." In fact, bowing to heaven and earth represents honoring the gods and goddesses of heaven and earth; bowing to the high hall represents filial piety; and bowing to the husband and wife represents respecting each other as guests.

14. Going out: Going out means that the bride leaves her mother's house. When the auspicious time arrives, the woman must be carried on the palanquin by the eldest sister; it is said that if the bride's feet touch the ground, it will bring bad luck. The bride's sister-in-law is not allowed to see the bride off when she leaves the house because the character for "sister-in-law" is a homonym for the character for "broomstick," so it is believed that it is bad luck for the sister-in-law to see the bride off when she leaves the house. Nowadays, when the bride leaves the house, the bridesmaids hold red umbrellas to protect the bride, in order to spread the leaves. As the bride and her sisters walk, they sprinkle rice over the sky, on top of the umbrella and on top of the float to "feed the golden chickens", meaning that the chickens will not peck at the bride after they peck at the rice. Finally, before boarding the float, the bride bows to her friends and relatives to show her appreciation.

15. Passing through the door: Passing through the door means that the bride formally enters the man's house after leaving the woman's house, and pays her respects to her husband's aunt and other elders of the man's family. Legend has it that the nuns can't see the bride and groom directly in the hall, because it would be a clash of opposites. Therefore, when the woman enters the man's house, the aunt will come out from her room to meet the newlyweds in the hall. The bride and groom will then pay respect to heaven and earth and then to their ancestors. The bride and groom will then kneel down and offer tea to the Auntie. The aunt will say some blessings and give the bride jewelry and gifts. The bride will put on the jewelry and gifts as a token of appreciation. The bride and groom then offer tea to other elders and relatives.

16, Sanchao back to the door: that is, return to the Ning, Sanchao refers to the third day after the wedding, the bride accompanied by her husband, with the preparation of roasted pig and gifts back to the mother's home to pay tribute to the ancestors, and then return to her husband's home with her husband; according to legend, in the pre-Qin Dynasty, there has been such a custom. Returning to one's mother's home means going back to one's parents to tell them that she is safe. In ancient times, transportation was not as convenient as in modern times, and if a woman's husband's family was far away from her mother's family, she might not have the chance to go back to her mother's family after she was married to her husband. Therefore, returning to her mother's home may be the last chance for a woman to set foot in her mother's home. Because of this, people attach great importance to this wedding custom of returning home. When returning home, the man's family needs to prepare: a roasted pig, two boxes of cakes, a pair of wine, two sticks of bamboo, a pair of chickens, lettuce, two baskets of fruits, onions, two boxes of noodles, chicken lanterns, pork belly and pork each of two catties.

17, urge makeup: is the male family to send people with gifts to urge the female family as early as possible for the bride to set makeup rituals. Song Dynasty, three days before the welcome, the male family to send makeup flower buns, pin gold cover, flower fan and other things to the female family, the female family replied to the gold and silver double victory in the Royal, Luo Hua Pu head, green robe, boots and other things.

18, send makeup: is a few days before the welcome, the female family will send the dowry to the male family rituals. The dowry is often loaded with boxes and cages, there are also families to show off the dowry, the dowry with a square table one by one, in a line of a column sent to the male family. The dowry usually has boxes, bedding, jewelry, clothing, silk, literature and gold and silver utensils, etc., there are also fields and houses, stores, pawnshops as a dowry. Zhejiang area, there is a dowry called "children and grandchildren bucket" (a large bucket with a large cover, for the bride to give birth to use), the bucket with red eggs, happy fruit, called "send children", there is a blessing. Shaoxing area, and send "daughter wine" as a dowry, that is, in the daughter of the full moon or a few years old, that is, brewing several altar buried in the ground, to be the day of the daughter to get married, take out as a dowry gift sent to the male family.

19, paved room: is the female family sent to the male family to lay the new room rituals, sometimes at the same time and send makeup. Song Dynasty, the day before the pro-welcome, the female family sent to the new room to lay the tent, bedding and other utensils in the room, and prepare gifts to warm the room. Then to close women or from the marriage of women to guard the room, no outsiders are allowed to enter, in order to wait for the newcomer. The person who paves the room must be a "good wife" who has good fortune and longevity and is from a wealthy family, so as to take good luck. This custom is still popular in some places in modern times.

20, wine feast: wine feast is almost every newlywed couple wedding ceremony is essential, passed down to today, "to eat wine" has become the folk wedding short. The main significance of the banquet, which may be simple or simple and of different sizes, is that the marriage of the bride and groom is recognized by their friends and relatives. Therefore, it is also the most socially significant part of the wedding.

21, the joint wine: connected by a line, the bride and groom each hold one, relative drinking ceremony. The wine cup is divided into two, symbolizing the couple's original two bodies; with the line connected to the handle, it symbolizes that the two are connected through marriage; together, it symbolizes that even though the couple has two bodies, they are one heart. Newlyweds at the feast **** eat a tripod prepared dishes, drink a cup, symbolizing mutual respect and love between husband and wife, intimate. Because of the profound significance of this ceremony, so later in the wedding are less of this program, of course, with the change of the times, the name is different, the utensils have also changed, the form of drinking is not the same.

22, haunted room: in modern times, this is the newlyweds in the wedding night in the new room to accept the congratulations of friends and relatives, playful rituals, the folk have "three days after the wedding no size", "haunted hi hi, the more the more hi," said. All over the "room" has a different way, method, the degree of trouble also have elegant and vulgar points, sometimes over the top, often to the host and guest of both sides to bring embarrassment and unhappiness, but because it adds a warm atmosphere to the wedding, so later in the wedding is often less than this program.