What is the background of the differences between Chinese and western family education concepts?

Due to the different historical traditions and social and cultural backgrounds, there are great differences between Chinese and western family education concepts. From these differences, we can find many ideas and practices worth learning from parents in China.

(A) pay attention to daily life behavior and habits

● Western parents: teaching from childhood to daily life.

Western parents attach importance to educating their children in their daily behaviors and emotions, respecting others in their inner feelings, and cultivating behaviors and habits in their daily lives.

● China's parents: neglected the "education of being a man"

However, parents and kindergarten teachers in China are often divorced from the reality of children's psychological development. For example, in kindergarten, they put forward the education of patriotism, revolutionary heroism and great idealism, ignoring basic behavior habits and good interpersonal communication, which are suitable for children's development stage.

We have been talking about education step by step, which is not only applicable to intellectual education and knowledge education, but also to moral education in doing things. At present, our children's moral concepts are indifferent and their social development is poor, which is not unrelated to parents' neglect of the most basic "life education" for their children.

Let the children learn to be independent

● Western parents: Let children learn to be independent by themselves.

Western parents generally believe that children have the ability of self-reflection and education. Children should work hard, live by themselves, get happiness from their efforts, get all kinds of knowledge and skills from their hands. Let children do what they can, which is respect for children.

For example, in the west, there are many cases where a father or mother walks in front and a toddler follows. They think it is very important to cultivate children's independence.

● China's parents: protect various levels of doting.

China's parents are afraid that their children will bump into each other, so they often hold or pull their children.

(3) Let children develop naturally

● Western parents: Let children develop freely.

Westerners have a relatively weak desire for their children to become famous and start a family. Instead of painstakingly designing their children's future, they pay attention to their free development and strive to cultivate their children into social people who can adapt to various environments and have independent survival ability.

Their family education is based on cultivating children's pioneering spirit and becoming an independent person.

Based on this concept, many families in western countries attach great importance to children's self-exercise since childhood. They generally believe that children's growth must rely on their own strength, so they should cultivate and exercise their self-reliance and independent living ability from an early age.

For example, let children know the value of labor from an early age, let them repair and assemble motorcycles themselves, and share the work of mowing the grass, painting the house, simple carpentry repair and so on. In addition, I have to go out to do odd jobs, push the lawn mower in summer, shovel snow in winter and sweep leaves in autumn. The labor such as delivering newspapers that western children have been engaged in since childhood is itself the tempering of the spirit of hardship. In the cold winter, when children of the same age in China are still asleep in the hot bed, western children have already got up and delivered newspapers door to door.

This may seem "cruel" to the doting parents in China, and it is this seemingly "cruel" education that has created the independent and self-reliant life skills of western children. In this subtle process, children gradually grow into citizens with independent viability and social responsibility.

China's parents: High expectations only focus on learning.

Many parents in China are eager for their children's success, so they go beyond the high requirements of their children's actual level, encourage their children to pull out seedlings to encourage them, and hate iron to produce steel, which is pervasive in their families.

In the process of children's growth, in addition to paying more attention to life, parents are most concerned about their children's learning. In order to make children behave well in school, parents will not let their children do things other than study in the future. It seems that studying well is everything, but they seldom pay attention to their independent living ability, social adaptability, mental health, moral sentiment and civic awareness, and some even ignore them completely. From birth to adulthood, parents prepare almost everything for their children, such as cooking, washing clothes, cleaning, saving money for their children to go to college, go abroad, get married, raise their children and so on.

Although our parents want their children to be talented and happy, such family education can neither make them talented nor happy, because social competition is not only a contest between knowledge and intelligence, but also a contest between will, mental state and being a man.

Pay attention to spiritual communication with children.

● Western parents: communicate frequently and attach importance to mental health.

Western parents pay more attention to the cultivation of children's healthy psychology, so they attach great importance to emotional communication with children and care about their psychological needs.

Parents regard happy education as an important educational content. They often discuss problems with their children, and children are willing to discuss things with their parents when they are unhappy.

Psychological research shows that healthy psychology is very important for children's success and the shaping of healthy personality.

● China's parents: they are more concerned about physical needs and ignore psychological needs.

However, in real life, many parents in our country do the opposite. In daily life, they basically focus on children's physical needs, pay little attention to or even ignore children's psychological needs, and ignore the cultivation of children's healthy psychology and the tempering of character and will.

In this way, to a certain extent, children's psychological endurance is too low to bear the pressure and setbacks in life. Even a trivial matter can make him depressed, decadent, give up on himself, run away from home at will, and even commit suicide and be world-weary. Such incidents are common in the media in recent years, and most of them are the result of the low level of family education, more precisely, the tragedy caused by parents' negligence in cultivating their children's healthy psychology.

Children need respect and understanding.

● Western parents: respect and understand children's psychology and choices.

Western parents generally believe that children are independent individuals from the day they are born, with their own independent will and personality.

Neither parents, teachers nor relatives and friends have the privilege to dominate and restrict his behavior. In most cases, they can't make choices for their children. It is to make children feel that they are their own masters, and even under what circumstances, parents should carefully consider, respect and understand their children's psychology.

● China's parents: dominant, demanding that children obey their own wishes.

Most parents in China require their children to be obedient and obedient.

(6) Encourage children to innovate and explore.

● Western parents: encourage innovation and exploration.

Western parents "encourage innovation", while China parents are often "satisfied with cloning". The former encourages children to surpass their predecessors, while the latter teaches children to stop in front of their predecessors.

Western parents believe that children have the same independent research and hands-on ability as adults, and can create an environment and atmosphere conducive to cultivating children's creativity with a tolerant attitude. They often take a positive attitude towards children's exploration behavior, encourage children to put forward different opinions in life and actively explore problems.

Even if parents think that children's behavior has no positive effect, they will not interfere too much, but let children gradually realize their own problems in their own exploration and correct them.

● China's parents: often satisfied with "cloning"

Most parents in China hold a negative attitude towards their children's exploration activities. They often regard children's own "exploration activities" as "nonsense" and stop them.

For example, if an American child dismantles an alarm clock at home, most parents will praise the child. If not, many parents will install alarm clocks with their children, and even encourage them to disassemble and reinstall them. However, if children in China remove the alarm clock at home, even if they can put it back, I'm afraid few dare to tell their parents.

Under the strict discipline of parents, children often have creative sparks in generate.